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Julia Locy May 2016
My thoughts are scattered in a million places. I feel my chest constrict with every single breath that I take. The constant stabbing in my heart coincides with every beat that it takes. The stabbing is consistently getting stronger and stronger as time goes on and becomes so overwhelming I feel as if i should cry out in pain.

I feel the ever present black cloud hovering over me at all hours of the day. It ***** the energy out of me. I can’t seem to tell if that black cloud is just my past, or if it is you.

When you left me standing in my drive way that cold rainy evening in April could have collapsed from the feeling in my chest and the pit in my stomach. As you drove away it was as if I was unraveling. The memories started pouring through my mind like a bright light. Flashing before my eyes like segments and scenes of a movie. The smiles danced past my eyes, and your smile seemed to be seared in my memory. Thinking of all of the time and secretes we shared. I had let you in and knew I handed you a knife, that you now lodged in my heart, and now it is threatening to rip me apart.

The only time I get relief from this is in those moments I open my eyes in the morning. For those few brief seconds I am light hearted…. for those few brief seconds I am actually okay…. but you ruined that for me because mere seconds later I feel everything crash down on me and start to crush me. The pressure is so painful that I shed silent tears and come to terms with the fact I can’t do it. My heart is more than aching and I feel my insides begin to press against my bones as they start to swell in panic. As I stare at the blankness of the ceiling I think of the vastness of the world, and the emptiness I feel in myself. I tell myself I can’t face the world… then a miracle occurs and I find something to whisper hope in my ear that I need to leave my bed and face the world.

After fighting with myself to stand and go outside. I move. I put on my mask to endure the world, and take what it throws in my face. I pretend it rolls right off of me as it leaves large ugly bruising diffusely spread across my body.
A quick stab in the side,
At least it will save him from
                                               "bEiNg BoReD"
Talking, snickering, whispering, talking, talking,
Just a quick stab in the back!
Maybe a hammer to the temple,
And a shot through the heart...

No?
Well, fine.
Ruin my fun.
I assure you he'll be back soon
If Satan couldn't listen to Jesus,
This ****** won't stay a day in hell.
The one friend I had has just been stabbed
Over something meaningless, petty and sad.
A life has just gone to waste
It has left the earth with all other than grace
What possesses one to commit such a heinous crime?
What choice, what idea, what thought will force this
man to do time?
I stare at the spot with a tear in my eye
Why is it you of all people that had to die?
My best friend, my brother, my partner in crime
I will always remember you, and I'll think about
you
all the time.
Silly, simplistic little poem based on a BBC Documentary about police officers. On this particular story, the police were responding to an incident where a 17 year old boy had just been stabbed 7 times. They resuscitated him but he later died.
I tried to put myself in the shoes of his friends who are screaming "I just want to see him".
P.s I've just stopped crying.
Falling words Jan 2015
Popping
Stabbing
Wounding my head

Why won't you leave me?
My old friend

You've been with me for so long a time
I've gotten quite used to you
Get out of my mind

stop clouding all my sunny thoughts
All you bring is darkness
I don't want to talk

I would love it if you would please go away
You aren't welcome here
I don't want you to stay

Stop telling me things I don't want to hear
I've heard it enough
I'm done with this fear

I know that I'm crap
You are too
So stop yelling at me friend
Cause I don't care about you

I'm allowed to be ****
I am trying for more
please just  
Let me shut the door.
PrttyBrd Jan 2015
Feeling every lie
******* a heart with daggers
Jagged rusty blades
1315
Dark metal grinding, stabbing static.
Aspiring chirps, and growing panic.
A glitch in the symphony,
a sudden epiphany.
The choir grows quiet, the church bells silent.
Absence of light, darkness takes flight.
Listened to a song by the M Machine and wrote down what I saw.
Riley Renee Jul 2014
Last night you handed me glass to swallow,
shards to choke on,                       and I did.
I choked.
Blood immersed my lungs.
It flooded around my kidneys, my bladder, my colon,
brimming the muscular tendrils near my nerves.
Slivers knife the tissue enclosing
a once-pounding-for-you heart.
The soul I sold to you, for
you, is polluted beyond preservation.
It’s the extinct ***** in my body,
a hearth of life no longer there.

You yell at me for something I cannot help;
force me to ignore beliefs when I must deny.
I understand you see no room to budge.
I accept that it’s hard to grasp.
But if you call for me, I’ll run         run         run             to you,
and I can’t help that I love you:
the way you coerce my body to throb
and pump blood               through and through
though sometimes you clot it.
Your lips, magnetic, lure me near,
forcing an opening to suffocate
me as spidery limbs finger my veins
leaving traces of your web to tangle
me whole.

You’re my stonefish gliding
towards exposed skin, preparing
to attack with neurotoxins.
As ashamed am I
that only you are the antidote, too
even in great blue waves swallowing me
like I once did glass
in the end
                                                            I­ still sleep in your sweatshirt.

— The End —