she was dancing around like a wallflower
sipping on sweet poison
a little too open  
her lips and memories soaking in *****
alcohol numbs her heart but burns the throat
no concern for dignity she is eager to loose
she peers into the cup and takes the dive
until her mind becomes distrait
among all else nothing matters
she gazed at herself in the mirror
her eyes were green
the kind of green that pushes its way through the piles of gritty snow to remind you spring is coming
the churning passionate green that the ocean turns during a storm
she realized through being drunk
she loved herself sober

I am a master of goodbyes
Black and whites
Nobody is at fault
Alone
I draw my lines
Define my boundaries
Is this better?
Sober
I can feel it all now
It hurts and crashes into my soul
Empty
I am hollow
The past echoes inside me
A walking heartbreak

so many people
write about love with
*****
whiskey
a joint
a crutch

i don't have a crutch
and i don't have a crush
and two negatives equal a positive
so what does this poem even mean?

i was drowning
but then came the pouring rain
and for the first time i could breathe

the glass on the table no longer tempting,
the voices in my head no longer speaking,
and the smoke that suffocated me have left for the night.

sober nights like this are what make me glad i didn't call you in the dark of night,
asking for a place in your heart that was never mine.
sober nights like this are what make me realize i was right,
right not to ask favors you were sure to decline.

they say doing nothing is an impossible thing to do, but sober nights like this are when i do impossible things for you.

shattered glass on the floor
but they were not mine nor were they yours
because we kept ours and so we dont bleed

i know tomorrow the wolves will howl again,
i know tomorrow i will miss the silent,
but while i can say this to myself, i'll ever be grateful for

sober nights like this take up my regrets,
regrets that i could have had if i crept on your blankets in the moonlight.
sober nights like this give ease to things i fret,
because here i get acknowledge the cost of fleeting delights.

the ghouls in my head make it hard for me to see, but sober nights like this let me know what's good for me.

the glass on the table no longer tempting,
the voices in my head no longer speaking,
and the smoke that suffocated me have left for the night.

i know tomorrow the wolves will howl again,
i know tomorrow i will miss the silent,
but while i have control over myself, i want to burn this to my head:

sober nights like this come and go,
and i know tomorrow i'll be drunk in my thoughts.
sober nights like this are hard to let go,
and even harder to remember after the return of the demons i fought.

i'm a slave to the darkness that broods inside, but at least in sober nights like this, for a while, to myself, i can lie.

The clouds, the wind, the sky...
Everything is something you can never buy

The stars, the moon and the sea...
They await to hear your plea

The flowers, gold fish and music...
brings you smile when you're sick

The moments when you're sober...
Think of them
You'll be calm
Yet, sober again
Because Sobriety is an addiction.

I love seeing you seat comfortably in silence, with a cup of coffee in the sofa at days
and I love it more when you talk to me at our bed time, with whiskey and chivas, telling me a lot of stories that I don't even understand

I love seeing you wear a tidy suit and tie,
and I love it more when you made it a little messy to look **** in front of me

I love when you kiss me forehead gently
and I love it more when you crave for my lips like you can't breath and I'm the oxygen.

I love when you tell me that I look nice in a fancy dress,
and I love it more when you tell me that I'm the most beautiful girl in this whole world when I'm in a pajamas

I love hearing you saying that you still love me,
and I love it more when you look at me like you really did

I love you when you're sober
and I love you more when you're high



I love



           the way



                           it lies

Why can't my liver filter thoughts like it does with alcohol?

It would save me the trouble of all the money I've spent to free myself of bad decisions,

There is so much formality within a sober moment, while my drunkenness speaks freely,

My brain doesn't erase moments like alcohol does, yet my liver puts up a fight reminding me to think,

Fantasizing over an image created by theses slurred and blurred overzealous eyes,

I am attracted to bars like teachers are to mls style, and to this day I'm still not sure which one has been more beneficial.

Looking down the road of allowing glass, I measured my state of mind to pick my poison,

Tequila adds a flower to a withering soul, ***** snuffs out the light where it gets to bold, whiskey fakes the fight with its bros, while gin loosens the bones and wine your emotions, at last we have beer a truth serum more powerful than love,

What they all take is feeling, a small price to learning what we see in the refection is really something we refuse to collude with.

My liver is always amazed, the amount of control I give to it, whilst the hand with a drink in it stays steady,

The other acquires shame, controlled by a freedom of released inhibitions,

If I could escape the safety of the dinner lights for the missing love that I thought drive me here,

My liver is alone, in the battle, like one soldier who's realized that their command center threw them into a death trap and their enemies are mindless zombies of fallen memories,

My toast is not alone, followed by smiles and condolences, significant enough to convince everyone, maybe one more.