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Hello Daisies Nov 2024
Years of screaming
Years of tears
Death
Demons
And hell
I fell
But always always
Came back
Felt it all
Used my emotions
To never again crawl

Spite helped me through
Spite helped me see
Spite was honestly
The best thing
For me

Hell came back
Hell came harder
Fire turned to lava
Mountains spewing
Oh the drama

I lost my sense of emotion
My send of me
I lost any destiny
Crippled
Alone
Torn from a future thrown
I was to die
Bitter and cold
Shaking and alone
The silence in my heart
The wounds never to part
I was alive
Yet buried six feet under
No wonder
No life
Just breathing in
Strife

Given up
No luck
No hope
No love
No stars
No God
I didn't give a ****
My heart turned black
The angels were only to attack
Angels of death
Demons of life
They filled me with hell
burned me til I couldn't
Yell

Years went by
Surely I was meant to die
Now and forever
Yet I didn't surrender
Never completely
Everyday dying
Still secretly trying
I would fight
While faces in the night
Taunt me
Telling me I'm not alright
Telling me I made my own plight
I'm crazy
Give up the fight

Never ever
Surrender your might
Never ever
Surrender your love
I can feel again
I can call my soul
A friend
In the end
My anger
My spite
Kept me through the night
Kept me giving all my might
*******
**** them all
I may fall
But I'll always stand tall
After it all
I am brave
I am strong
I belong
Life has it out for me
I will not beg or plead
For an eternity
I will win
I will grin
I will love with all my heart
I will see angels
And not death
I will see October
And nothing less
I cannot digress
Enough
How strong I was
How strong I am
Murdered
Broken
Beaten
Slammed
I was shamed
I was blamed
Stabbed through the heart
Told never to start

Here I am
Smiling again
The music is glistening
I am listening
With grace in my soul
I will always know
I'll be okay
It'll be okay
Feeling is beautiful
In every ******* way
Hi
Mercy Nov 2024
When I gaze into the mirror,
I see no reflection,
When they take my picture,
There is no image to capture,
It feels as though I do not exist,
No connection between my body and soul,
When silver strikes, I still feel it,
Yet I do not claim it as my own,
I yearn for a body that captures my essence,
One day,
I will confront the shadows that haunt my soul
Steve Page Nov 2024
I have several names.

My first was the name
my mother wielded,
but she later conceded
I had an earlier name,
a longer name
that my father gave me,
a name borrowed
from the long dead,
the name authorities
would know me by.

And later, you adorned me
with shorter, snappier names -
names loaded with love
names that could be sung
and in which I took comfort
and pride.

When as a student I arrived,
wheeling cases through customs,
I saw the linguistic gymnastics
reflected in their eyes
but I kept silent and smiled,
lest they felt they fell short
lest they sensed that I found fault
in their command
of each element of my name.

But the truth is I hold
my true names elsewhere,
in my place of song and friendships
far from these shores.

I have several names
and accumulate more each year
as I spare acquaintances
the shame of verbal stumbles.

I have several names,
but I know who I am
with you.
Many of my friends who have had the courage to migrate carry many names.
Cassandra Nov 2024
Am I the way I think, the way I dress,
Or the way I speak?
Or am I defined by the way
I broke my own heart through rotten adversities?

Am I kind, am I bitter, or am I stuck in between?
Does everyone remember the ways I hurt them
Or the ways I healed?
Am I shaped by my destiny
Or by the paths I carve myself?
Will I make a difference,
Or will my life just quietly pass?

Am I the things I hate, am I the things I love?
Am I the things I do, or the things I think of?
Am I the words I write or the scenes I paint?
What happens if I stay? What happens if I go?

When they look at me, do they see a face or a heart?
Am I the way I spurn or the way I laugh?

Am I this? Am I that?
I am a thousand things,
everything plays a part.
Dustin Dean Oct 2024
The fields of gold—
Looking grave
as past faces
caught up quickly,
smothering any presence
with smoldering reminders.

Alas, the echelons of memories
stood tall, like soldiers
steadfast, unwavering
to the imminent fall.

They remind him of his reflection,
belabored by reality’s labor.
Lines buried in sand,
etched onto his head—
burning coals of souls
that throttle his legs into motion.

He runs, and runs,
coerced to send the sun
his kinetic aspirations,
to deflect and reflect,
to dissolve prophecies beleaguered.

For it is he
who devises the Devil
of his own doing.
Wary Oct 2024
True depth of pain one cannot claim,
Until they’ve walked through sorrow’s flame.
To feel its weight, to understand,
One must be touched by life’s own hand.
You can’t feel or understand the pain unless you go through it.
Make my
Body holy so
I can offer my self
As living sacrifice oh Lord
Treat this
As notable service from me
Make my body holy
By forgiving
My sins
Romans 12:1
is Oct 2024
misspoke.
made a
mistake. am
too much space.
want to erase &
retrace my steps. can't
face myself in the mirror
every word, an error.
stumble like
a drunk
with shoulders shrunk
over what to say

should i
shut up? you've
had enough
Ruby Scar Oct 2024
Forever lost in gloom
Rising from the tomb
Where chaos rests and death resides
To offer up the obscene
To facilitate a dream
To fall away, to disconnect
To fall apart
To regret
Mercy alters
Paranoid
Broken, foul
Bitter and annoyed
Cold as ice
Hot as gold
Broken again
Into darkness
Into dream
As I fall
So extreme
To forsake this wretched pain
To Disappear into the Rain
What will follow
What will be
Leave you hanging
Leave you floating
Reconciled at my expense
Talk is cheap
Endlessly minding
I can't breathe anymore
I can't take anymore
Into the rain that I adore
From now on
Forevermore
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