Actually that really ******
I read the message right when you sent it. And it took me three hours to respond because I didn't know what to do. I mean it's all whatever but the news you delivered has really put a **** damper on my thought process. Coming second best has been the issue in the past three semi sort of relationships I have had and every time the weight gets heavier and heavier and it just *****. I hate coming in second. More than anything. It spurs my jealous blood stream. So I guess In future reference..maybe no reason is better than a reason to not want to see someone. For me it's the less I know the better. Because I think too much.

If you feel like you can't survive
Simply ask yourself if you can survive the month
And if you can't do that ask yourself if you can survive the week
If you can't do that, the day
Or simply the second
And live in that second in tell the next one starts

When you told me you loved me again
you were wearing the same shirt as
when you told me you just wanted to be friends and
I had to stare at the same buttons through the same tears
because I knew it couldn’t be true.

This was after we sat at the same table
where we celebrated a year of memories
after we threw them out only to recreate them now.
And I’m unaware if you had more or less to drink now
than the night you first told me you loved me.
All I know for sure is that you had the same tears in your eyes
as the time you called me wonderful as you call me amazing now.

Wonderful was only enough for the 39 days after you first said you loved me
and amazing was only enough for a suspended five days and I was right.

You asked me to stay knowing you were going to leave
and I should have known because you’re always the one to leave and I’m always the one to stay but as we both drive away from the place that birthed us I can’t be mad at it or
sad for what we lost because there is nothing to return to.
We over stayed our welcome, we wore out what we built by going in circles,
dancing with the same issues,
and orbiting around the same moon and me and you and her.

There’s the expression of beating a dead horse with a stick and we are the horse and the stick,
we were waves that kept hitting the same shore and
we’ve hung ourselves out to dry and
we are now an aftertaste in the back of my mouth.

"I love you, I do, so much. but right now it scares me to settle down everything again and extend another opportunity for you to hurt me once more."

Christ does not save us because he is desperate or lonely.
For he does not need the human race for praise or anything.
But because he loves us each with an unconditional Love.
For he has thousand of Angels that Praise him always in heaven.
If he wanted an faithful group , he could raise the Rocks.
To worship him, to Praise him as well, he never did need us.
So realize before this before you pass onto the other side.
It is not Christ that needs us, but it is us that needs Christ.
For even though we are an evil lot, he still wants to be our God.

I was settled for in my relationship and he loves me, he loves me.
I can't shake the feeling that I'm second best, and he loves me, he loves me.
He looks at me but I'm not the prettiest, but he loves me, he loves me.
I know in my heart that he loves me, he loves me.
But I'll always know deep in my soul, I was settled for.

I met the devil the other day
you wouldn't believe
what he had to say.

Said I'm tired of always leaving
without a chance to believe
deceived by all my lying.

My fate is tied to my sin
death caused by a tree
to meet a fiery end.