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Elaenor Aisling Aug 2021
This is a poem for the anger
I keep coiled around my ribs
Because I was taught that anger is an absinthian poison
That will rise like bile in the throat and must be swallowed.
And I realize you may read this
And you may be angry
But I realize with each crunch of bone
I must give myself the space
To uncoil in this way.

I am angry
That you made me a captive reservoir
for the bitter droughts you refused to drink yourself.
You were iron-stomached after years of punches,
that I understood.
Open handed, I wanted to be the exception
But holy palmer’s kiss
Was still not enough to let me cross the threshold.
You are the locked room in the house that the children are forbidden
Only small glimpses between hinges
Of your fear poisoned self
Huddled in a corner, vomiting apologies.

I am angry
for believing I could have lain beside you
every night for the rest of my life
And not starved to death from loneliness.

I am angry
for ignoring how I dimmed each time I waited for you
to want me, to miss me, to think of me,
to ask me to come into your arms,
to find me fascinating, enchanting
to tell me you needed me;
to betray anything that proved I was more than convenience,
A drink that served itself on a silver platter,
Asking to be drunk.
If you only knew how luminous I could be
when loved well.


I am angry
That I still hope you will be waiting by my door after work
because you realized how you starved me
And now you’ve set a banqueting table, a banner over me is love
But I know you will never do this.
I know you cannot do this.
I am angry
that I miss only the space you left,
That I have not yet been able to close the gap
And walk away from your memory.
Find someone who goes out of their way to make you smile, because seeing you happy, makes them happy too.

Someone who traces your scars as if they are a story, and they aren't afraid to stop reading it.

Someone who knows you're sad when you start posting quotes on your story again, and shows up at your door to give you a hug, because they know that's what you need.

Someone who listens to you like your words are their favourite song and they don't ever want stop listening.

Find someone,
Who treats your precious heart like their favourite treasure, because that's what it is.

Don't you ever settle, because I promise you, someone out there has been waiting to give you the world, don't settle until you find them.

-c.m.
zelda rangel Jul 2021
You have the most pleasant touch,
most pleasant eyes, most pleasant wrinkles.
Kotschka, you have turned me into a fire
without knowing it, without seeing it.
Now that you do, look at me and show
me remorse, and give me your condolences.
This is my very first time saying this:
I died when you looked at me
and I died when you said 'hi.'
I died when you smiled,
and I died again when you touched me.
This is how it's going to be, but know
that I can die again and again
as long as it's for you and because of you.
Simroze Mar 2021
I hate it when the rain stops;
When melancholy fades,
I hate it when the growing stops,
When clouds' whispers no longer fill the sky with wind shades.
I hate it when the day caused by thunder sets,
I hate it when quieter it gets.
When the flickering lights go out,
When my inner self can no longer shout.
I hate it when the leaves go still,
I hate it when the roads no longer squeal.
I hate it when the rain stops;
When melancholy fades,
I hate it when the sky leaves me alone in saudade.
~Simroze
12•3•21
03:11am
thana evreux Dec 2020
you painted red on my lips
wider than my mouth,
reeking with insecurities
you pulled my teeth out.

you wiped my gushing tears
put mascara on my eyes,
pouring envy you stapled them
and bleed my ears with lies.

you tied a blue ribbon on my dress,
swore darkness in between my hands.
scathing my heart with loneliness,
you clipped strings on my arms and legs.

when the spotlight unfolds the curtains
a wild puppet show, their clap and cheers—
burried the screams of my agony and pain.
all they see on me was a smile from afar,
blinding flashes of camera hides all my scars.

after my tickets got sold—i surrendered
writing death on my palms, and when
i kissed the tip of blade with my wrist
that’s when i finally found my peace.

for you are a foe disguised as my friend,
and the death of me will be your only end.

a friend or a foe, 𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧.
Shain Brown Nov 2020
I cross the ocean for you
only for my ship to sink
not by fire or cannon
but by the simple toll of waiting

decay

I feel the water squeezing my chest
replacing my air with your water
pushing into my system
that was never mine
A part of my skin burns,
the other patch numb with cold.
Torn between the extremes,
I crave water.
Hundreds of gallons of it.
Anticipating it to soothe,
to bless the charred insides.

There’s a puddle under the table
or under my hallucination.
I can’t tell.
I touch it with my face, dreamily.
Each gulp as confusing as the last.
I am not sure how to tell
if it can be a saviour or not.
Shain Brown Nov 2020
You and i were there
Watching as our worlds crash down
We repaired them
No, We repaired yours
And let mine burn down in the ashes
But that was enough for you

You let me freeze
Time stopped
Nothing moved

Until you pressed play
On my life
Then I lifted your world
And you left me in the cold, again

I tried to call out
I needed help
I needed you

But you didn't care as much you said you do
And went on with your new life
One of many

Next time your world will crash down
I'm not helping you lift it
You'll be alone
Frozen
Like me
Retro Oct 2020
It holds the energy forever.
been awhile. hard to believe it’s been 2 years.
Diksha Dhiman Oct 2020
and in the last sonnet
You will blame love because of your lover.
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