You broke me, but that is nothing new.... I knew you had the means to break me when we were almost something.... I had handed you my most prized possession.
I so effortlessly passed myself over, too naive to think about the consequences, or the fact that even though I love you, it didn't mean you loved me.....
I knew you broke me when I was sitting in a restaurant too exhausted to cook, breaking down at the table by myself while watching couples who could have been us laughing and eating.
I knew you broke me when I hated going to bed and staring up at that stupid dull white ceiling in silence, my mind going over everything I might have done wrong.
when sleep came I was finally at peace, but not for long....
I knew you broke me when every morning I dreaded getting up because it meant I had to do another day without you.
I knew you broke me when I hated myself, hated how I looked because maybe if I looked better you would have stayed and chosen me.
hated how I talked, maybe if i used a softer tone? or more stern? you wouldn't have chosen her?
maybe if my eyes were blue? or my hair blonde?
I knew you broke me when I was tearing myself apart because you left....
you broke me, but I already knew you would.

it’s fuzzling (fuzzy n’ puzzling)
this pizza emoji broad based, across
all ages, ubiquitous and beloved to
all, universality

it’s meaningful to the otherwise
meaningless noise that  emotional
connoisseur connotations that replace
what used to be called conversation

so this Valentine’s Day, my beloved
will receive her exyrs thin crust mozzarella
plain, (I pay more for less!) replacing her dalliance trials with various margarita pizzas

The kids, with greater appreciation for
the creative sudy of pizza design have
some crazy notions that are toothy shocking
to reveal herein publicly

the weighty concerns of the underlying
true meaning of this caricature is beyond
my ken, I’ll wiggle away gracefully and
please please an extra cheese variation
with barbecue sauce?

P. S. YES, yes, this indeed is an
only love poem of course

“Red skies in the morning, sailors heed warning”
Beautiful orange sunrise, from the top of this wayne mountain
Dress the new york city skyline in marmalade
Bring us the promise of a turbulent winters storm tonight
Save me from tomorrows trials and tribulations
Snow me in, cover me up
and I’ll find warmth in your frozen promise
            

                                                  ­     ---
                                      Marmalade dressed sky
                                Peaceful mountain top sunrise
                                            Chaos tomorrow
                                                       ---

As I ponder, sweetly mused,
your grace against the breeze,

I cower at the frightful task
of earning but a please.

Your humble smile, your giddy laugh,
of which I must appease,

I sink into my sullen soul,
unable to unfreeze.

For with this heart, I cannot pledge
to you your beauty’s ease.

I want to be held, just once, deeply. Wrapped tight in arms that feel careful and sure, holding me like something precious. I need the weight of someone’s warmth anchoring me, grounding my soul against the pull of empty rooms and silent nights. Shadows have learned my name; they call to me, and I need a voice to answer them, someone to whisper back to me, comforting me as I spill out my dreams, my lost hopes. To trace the lines left by my fears, to smooth the scars hidden under my skin. To be held by comfort itself, stitching up the wounds, letting healing come slow. Someone who’ll listen as I release the secrets buried so deep they’ve become part of me. I want to be held, just once, close enough to drown the silence in the sound of your heartbeat.

Time. Slow down just for a moment. I’m chasing after you, desperate not to be left behind. Every second slips through my fingers, no matter how hard I try to hold on. I beg for more, but you only drift further away, gripping my collar as if to drag me onward, ready to let go and leave me behind if I hesitate. Life rushes me through unfamiliar doors, past places I can’t recognize, shedding pieces of myself along the way. Each tick of the clock stirs my fears, a reminder of all that’s slipping away. Hours vanish in the span of a blink. I’m trying, pushing forward, stumbling blindly through the years, fighting to become someone better, grasping for strength. I’m finally seeing my faults, glimpsing my chance to grow, struggling to make up for the seconds wasted and the opportunities missed. But how am I supposed to heal when you haunt my every step? Just one moment, that’s all I need, to catch my breath, to mend the cracks, to become who I long to be. But my pleas go unanswered as you run faster, slipping out of reach. The nights echo with your ticking, a metronome of loss. Dreams once within reach now lie shattered. Can we pause, even briefly? Just let me stand still as you rush by. I need more of you, Time, to keep learning, to keep trying. But somehow, I know there’s not much left.

I'll drop to my knees for you;
You don't even have to ask.
Just let me do this simple task -
let me hear those shuddered gasps.