She left her beauty
in the shade
preserved for those
who dare
walk into her darkness

She left her other self
in the shade
covered by the innocence
whose scent seduces those
bewitched by
the beauty of a rose

I wrote you a poem on
our first date
                on tissue paper ..

I'd kept it all these years  
                                 framed
on our bedside table..

When I saw you with another,
               I knew we were over.
So I wiped my **** with it

Putting it on her pillow,
             with new words.
You treated my heart like excrement.

So I've wiped you from my
                                 thoughts.
             My old verse is no more.

All that is left are ******
                                       feelings,
That I wiped away with my first words.

Silly sullen sentences
strut in my brain
boiling baffling batches
of cluttered dust-bunnies
creating a babel tower of
lost love lullabies
slowly
decaying, dying, drifting
Wet your quill
with the ink of now
write new lulls
swaying your pendulum
between your now's
and what's yet to come

When I go back
and listen from beginning to end
every song I listened to back then,
I feel so sad.

Remembering all that I did,  
back when I was feeling hopeless.

never has death
seemed more
humble, or charming
sincere, engaging.
Extending a hand
to a friend
in need
it seems.
But we only
brush fingertips...
I am scared
that the land of the dead
will not accept me
if I
stumble in
uninvited.

something in me
stuck the day
you didn't come.
my eyes became machinery;
every sound caught
in my throat
and the silence
followed for weeks.
I smoked 14 cigarettes
in the car;
I burned at the thought
of stillness;
I was vulnerable to light;
I washed my body in the way
you said my name.

now I come
to the sound of leaving.
like the way a symphony sounds
to deaf ears,
I am unafraid of what
you will say to me.
we are different people now;
I am silent
and you are stillness;
we are tangled around
the sadness of each other.

I have been running
in between towns
waiting for your capture;
I am running
hoping to never be found.