If i had the choice
I would un-know you
And get to know again
Like the last time
I would do the same
And feel the same
And get my heart broken
The same way
Just to know you
And feel that way
For a while  
For just a second
I would be heartbroken a lifetime

For all those moments, I tried so hard
You make me feel... bad
For all those lack of words,
oh! beauty, beauty...
How weak can you turn these words
What new words should I create
To pronounce your marvel inside out
You make me feel so new
yet I can't blossom nor bloom
How deeper intensity should it beget
The one word- that can recreate your grace
Of time- history to future
Where do you belong...
Oh darling, my darling
You are my mystery island
And for all these questions unanswered
Through words...mere words; so incomplete and fragile
For all these emotions unsettled
love and deeper, yours and mine
You make me feel so goodly bad
Yet in silence, you make me whole
Delightful with sweeping flashbacks
And still I feel so bad
For every thought, I lose words to poem you
For every second, I seem to miss you
For every moment, I miss to respire you
For every chance, I fail to whisper "I love you"

Raging Rapids,
Knocking you down.
Scream my name.
I love you!
You’re too much.
… Oh, Is that true?
Do I drown you?

The way you love to talk more than
****
makes me want to be the reason
you fall silent as
you hold me

flashing blue lights
stop lights
car lights
the light in your eyes
opening me to the night
a glowing spark sending
fear far from you and I
in a world where all we need is ourselves
we forget to live with each other
around the fears and doubts
that no doubt
are here
i hear you now
i look in your eyes
not letting myself fear the contact anymore
connection is intimidation
it has been for years
the closer you look at someone
the more flaws you see
so we live saying
look at me
but not closely
i cant let you see me for me
like keys on a keyboard
you press into me
embrace
my forehead pressed against your chest
feeling the pulse of your heart
like a tapping foot
restless heart syndrome
the words from your breast speak louder
than word of mouth
or words from mouth
and i love you
i love you i love you i love you
i really do
and i feel cheesy as all hell writing this down
but holy **** do i love you
and you are far away
and i cant handle that very well right now
i need you
i just need to be held
and hear your voice
and kiss your stupid face
because i ******* love you
and i cant think of any other way of putting that right now
im creatively drained

I wonder if u ever think of me in a nice way?
I wonder if I made a good impression on ur life?
I wonder if ur glad we hung out and that u got to know me like no other?
I wonder if u miss me af all like I miss you?!!??

of faking smiles,
pretending im okay

im very very tired
of breaking and beating myself
trying to fit into your cage

im very very tired
of hearing "how are you"s on campus
and knowing that a fleeting friendly second isn't enough to explain

im very very tired
of going out at night and drinking my problems away

im very very tired
of selling myself to feel like i have worth

im very very tired
and sleep just isn't helping

remember when i wrote poems about how much i love you,
i still do.