i find it stupid that we were taught
two negatives cancel out to be a positive
do two wrongs ever cancel out to be a right?

ages ago, i made two stupid mistakes
hooking up with you in the gallery and losing your number
but i bet you're doing just fine

it's been three years, counting the first
and it's depressing to think about but
my memories have started to fade with time

i can't remember the tilt of your smile
the curves of your dimples or the lilt of your accent
if your hometown was cambridge, quincy, or boston

i can't recall the feeling of your fingers woven through mine
or the warmth of your body pressed against mine
or the way my heart raced from your words

so i'll tuck away whatever's left of the good times
into a little chamber in my heart
let it simmer and boil and wait

until the day we find each other again
i'll keeping looking back and thinking
i'll keep looking back until i realize again

english is a strange language
red is a mesmerizing color
my guitar sounded better when you were playing it

two past events cancel out to form the present
only one of the two mistakes previously mentioned was stupid
and when i said i loved you, i meant it

God Brought A Beach Towel

  Written By: Breanna Womble



...

I’m starting to understand
The slight of hand
That it takes to see this world as an ocean
                                                So vast and deep
                                  With secrets to keep-
I spread love on like tanning lotion
                                        
(..) I forgot how the sun feels from this perspective
As my heart beats quick with/          
                             as if it’s,
                                                                         /To keep up with lost time.
I know now I hold the full Collective
all the while I stay and destroy the retina’s in my eyes.
                               This time around,
                                    Loving me is the new objective-
gazing at new found patience with what follows sunrise
                                                                      And left these sands of time-
                                                                      One grain left to fall amongst the Hour,
All this chaos I hold inside of me-
                                           In-spite of trees that Fear let tower

Ahead of me is too far gone
twin flames too, burned away...
Lake Eerie drowned our fire quickly/
                                                           a parted heart of two;
half-hearted sunsets shadowed days,
To the boy I thought I knew.



Do you suffocate with silence?
Do the sun-rays burn your eyes?

All this technicolor vision Love,
Colorblind through cobalt eyes’


(..) I know now of not tomorrow,
                                                          But sea, to my dismay;


                                                        
Salt lake kisses from Oklahoma/


                                                      ...Taste like soulmates in PA.




~Breanna Womble

you learnt I was scared of thunder
and mesmerised by lightning
your freckles had doubled in number
and in the morning we are fighting
the hottest day for months
as the earth tries to sweat us out
I lay naked and sweating also
trying not to shout
leave in ten
no leave in five
or never leave you're always right
so I trundle on a bus
now clothed after my own morning of no fuss
I wonder what the ****
why early morning buck
why calamities and sweaty dagger eyes
cause in your dream
I had been mean
well
I don't know her
and she's not me.

Journal entry
May 7, xxxx

She knows I love her, my creature. Of course she does.
There are still secrets between us; there might always be. We haven't decided.
You see, some lovers- they reach a point- where they dance that silent dance, and wordlessly through looks and smiles, will decide that some secrets will always be secrets. Others say everything, and find strength in doing so. We're not there yet. And so, some things remain unspoken.

A secret I keep from her now is- I know what she is, yes, but I can't help but think of her as the opposite sometimes. A thing not with dove wings and a halo, like the paintings, but a creature with thick, rubbery wings. Heavy horns sitting on her head. There is something uniquely dark about her.

There is so much I still don't know. There is a heaven, is what she's told me. It isn't as beautiful as you think, she says. When I ask her if there is a God, she looks away. And I know there is something in my question that brings her pain. She has never answered the question.

She still walks to her lake. (Yes- it's hers now.) She visits it often.
She does it at night, when I'm asleep. But I wake easily in her presence. I've caught her walking towards the wood. I know it's the lake she goes to. It must be. I've never followed her.

She thinks she hides it well. But I can tell there is a rage. You visit your lake in secret, and what would you have to hide, if not the fact that over there you must be inflicting yourself with some violent ritual. Something I should not see. You must have some kind of terrible thing inside of you. Divine grief, or envy, something that must be gnawing at your heart. I can see it in your eyes.

Why won't she tell me? I worry sometimes that I'll never be allowed to help her. I suffer with these thoughts, and she doesn't say a thing.

There are silences like arrows, aimed at you, meant to **** you. Meant to maim the heart. But not hers.
Her silence is the kind that hurts to look at, because you know it isn't a choice. The more I **** the more her throat seems to tighten. It's as if she wants to tell you everything, but physically can't. As if telling you was an arrow. As if telling you her truths and her fears would

  **** her


I want to know why she goes to the lake, I do. I want to know what happened before. What is God to you, what has he done? Tell me please, even if I am not enough, even if I am just the rabbit you tell your sorrows to. I may be from another world, I may be the animal unable to ever understand your pain, but my ears are long and my eyes are big and I will listen and watch you intently. I love you.

Sometimes I think I'm too small. How could a thing like you choose a thing like me? The thought used to **** me. I'm learning not to spiral. Even if you won't help me. I have to stay strong. I have to show patience.
Yes, if she wants to keep her secrets, then keep her secrets she must. I worry about her, but what can I do. I can only be patient. I can only do what I can. I can only love her until she decides to bloom before me.

My angel who howls by the moonlit lake.
I will wait for you.

in the few moments
before dreamland crashed into reality
the skies glittered like cities of light

there was the sight of your bright eyes
admiring in the soft candlelight
the silhouette of your finger

tracing the constellations as
you shared a story of dusk and dawn
leading to the promises of a forever

which rolled from your tongue and became
the only words that ever mattered as much as the
"of course, i care," which you melded into lullabies

that repelled the terrors of loneliness
of wars in the heavens and monsters in the dark
your smile radiated light and

in the way your warmth surrounded me
you became young apollo
and i, your uncursed, loving daphne

a day on the beach
empty sands stretch with lovers
and the heartships sail