still not enough
two cold cups of coffee later,
once the morning show has ended
and Boss quits yelling through walls.

jingle bells leap through the door,
an alert to be alert.
yeah times are tough,
but we're tougher.

keep on smiling,
another threat will leave
and you’ll still have a job
and you’ll still have a bed.
so they’re not satisfied
with the color palette,
big deal.

escape route would be nice,
but then it’d be You vs World
and there’s just too many of Them.

well,
at least soon there will be
one more of Us.

Every time I answer I give away a little more of myself
The list of things I need to be grows every day
Another gap to plug with lines.

It’s hard to take sometimes.

I have begun to suspect that the old adage
“It's not you, it's me,” is not really about broken love but about ******* job applications.
You breathe a say of relief, I can hear it, “thank god not another lonely-hearts column”
Only a poem, insipid and sighing.

But I’m fresh onto the stage treading the boards for the very first time.
Swollen by years of septic success
Swimming in a pool on the Strand I was a happy middleweight
In this ocean, I am a particle of micro-plastic, unwanted but bobbing along nonetheless.

Another email, better than no email at all, regretting, informing and wishing me the best.
I draw myself together pulling at the loose strings at my seams, greeting, informing and thanking them for consideration, again.
This time though, the holes seem stretched, the string frayed
I’m a little worried that it will give, tired of straining it will collapse under the weight of my doused desire.

But there’s not much to be done.
So, I fill myself up with some watered-down ire, three coffees, a nibble of cake and a croc of horseshit with which to sell my fire.

fell to earth a day ago
bounced back up on purpose
no job is to bad
i am retired

education
The High School for Crying
The College for Artists
who fear much more than dying

special skills
I can see things that are not there
I can take more than anyone can bear
I can work without lunch or dinner
I can let myself get thinner and thinner
I can suffer and still sing
I can be silent through almost everything

goals
I will write until I ache
I will sing until I break
I will give more than I take
I will make a mistake


wait


hold on

no, wait

please don't go

don't reject my resume

please no

I'm telling you that's it, I quit!
A year on now I weigh a ton,
drinking my way out of this pit.

Hotel meals with a book I sit,
a woman on her own must be fun...
I'm telling you that's it, I quit.

Day after day sleeping a whit,
puff in the lungs and pulse on the run,
drinking my way out of this pit.

Monday drive bawl or afternoon fit,
abusing I yell before the sun,
I'm telling you that's it, I quit.

A ring and a promise, we almost split,
I never home or seeking to stun,
drinking my way out of this pit.

I will admit I learned a bit.
Of colleagues and business I knew none.
I'm telling you that's it, I quit
drinking my way out of this pit.

Once he met a *******
She seemed happy
and little pride on her face.
He asked her
"Why did you choose this? "
She replied with a mocking smile on corner of her face.

"Because I'm good at it............................."

Someone send me fifty cigarettes.
Keep me awake far past sunset.
Get the football on immediately
And make it a fiery affair.
Drown out this mop and bucket mouth.
Find me a guitar string to silence a theatre.
Strum all the chords in unison.
Whisper powerfully into the crowd's ear
About the journey to solar eclipse bliss.
Ignore the scattered failures,
Stamps on lamp-posts,
Brash stickers of the past,
Cornered in all that success.
Distraction from the looming task ahead.
Let the teaming rain return to my brain,
Where pie survives in cement,
Jackdaws squawk and talk of walks
Across the kissing couple hills
Instead of pizza orders set for ten.
Counting stock with matching socks.
Clocks are the enemy these days.
But they may be my best friend.

and that's perfectly accurate
as its not yours

and your only job is to get you