some days i worry
that the person i said i won’t be
will eventually end up to be the future me
in ways that i never could dream

what if i never get out of this mess
worse, what if this is my best
what if i fail all of life’s tests
& what if the problems never get less

If only, I can fly again
If only, I can fall again
If only, I can love again
If only, I can break again

If only, I can accept
I'll never see you again.

you know
these matchstick men
inked on wrecked angle blank page
you know these
women con trap
that act on command
because  match stick men
light their fires
more lovingly
if they pick up  that log
bound in the fog and burned
shore lights were on
sea  not at home
see **** thought less
about the other
or the fact shes a mother
of four peeping eyes
with heart shaped by minds
helped less when shes blind
not of your kind
from the other side of the tracks
where we don't got the backs
havenots
got a chance
when we sabotage
her glance
at any semblance of romance
cos we can
I guess thats why they call
you the man
in the know
of how does the garden grow
that they sow

Maybe if you knew
How this mind works
Like I do

Maybe you'd run for the hills
and maybe you'd engage for the thrills
Maybe.... Only if you knew

"If all men count with you but none too much"
If you're open to all
but not too blind to identify those who would watch you fall

If you can give without expecting
If you can leave without holding grudges but hold precious memories dearly;
If you can say SORRY and mean it
If a pal's apology doesn't inflate your pride...

If you can see BEAUTY and adore her
If you can see her in the mud and recognize her
If she is out of sight but you can see her within
If she is nearby and attended to
If she is around and honored...

If there is love in your heart
If you say it and do it
If you can lose to win and tell the story not for men's praise or the glory
If you can bend a knee for a greater victory!
If you can insist on the right thing and refuse to bow to pressure...

THEN,

You're a good man deserving Heaven's bliss, the Earth's fullness and all things good and fulfilling!

We keep dreaming of Ifs and what ifs, Maybe if all ifs and what ifs happen we might still end in the same way and nothing might change and Yet everything lies in the wake of not understanding that no ifs or what ifs can be festerd into your present for its decided in your past.