Sometimes I wish I could disappear
They never guessed this would rip me in half,
This is ripping me in half.
But it’s fine,
It’s just fine.
I can’t get high anymore,
I can’t get high because I need more and more and more and it’s never enough. It’s never enough to forget.
It’s never enough to forgive.
I can taste metal in my dreams—
this is all the life I’ll ever need.

I just want you to know
That if someone asked if you were a good person
I would vouch for you
I’d even make out on the couch with you
Like in high school
And I know you’ll do stupid **** sometimes
But just promise you’ll be my fool

I'm so confused
I crave my own demise
But believe I have a purpose
I know I'm loved,
But I don't want it
I chase after highs
To capture escape
Then savor the crash
The pain, my justice
And honestly,
I'll do anything
If it makes my mind
Float away
From the tempest
Within my flesh

You got me high
Then let me fall
I hit the ground
And now
I don't know
If I want
To get back up
Out of my hell

one day
you're outside riding your bike
getting scrapes on your knees
that your mother kisses
after she's bandaged

one day you're running outside with your friends
throwing water balloons
without a care in the world

one day you're sitting in class
praying to go home
and for time to move faster

one day you'll hear your name called out
loud and clear
a stage awaiting your footsteps toward your future

one day it will all be over
appreciate it now
you don't have
as much time
as you think

im a
rowdy
unforgiving
loud
angst filled teen

i'm going to do whatever i want
sounds awful
but

sorry dad
love you mom

you love me less and less each day
hopefully
once i've come home from a party
smelling like *****
and a boys cologne
it will be enough for you to give up on me

Share nearly enough
Something he longed for
Chocolate high,
creamy and pure,
special and great,
Nibble the lovely sweet taste.