Mirrorball - “the fabrication of our performance”

a life long struggle to accept who I am,
of course, lose, and lose again, and
the fabrication of our performance now
inherent in every excuse and mirrorball
revolving asking, no, laughing, at our
vanity, as we endeavor, enabled by the
paucity of ego, the neediness of weakness’s
to catch, keep, hold each single flickering
light spot in our open, slick palms forever

we fabricate our performance of daily living,
modifying our measurements to match output,
only a human cannot wake only to fall within
each daily tabulation without thinking, once:

I am a hero, worthy of acknowledgement, just
look at my hands! see how many spots of
light I can claim as mine! the mirrorball turns
and turns paying no mind to the worshipers
below, until some sorrowful fool confesses,
fools fail, fools fail, turning the dervish off,
the white flag of ego darkened, once more...

we are all false poets, false prophets, occasionally confessing



7:34 AM
Sat Jul 18
The Year of the Virus, Corona

The meaning of growing up,
Perhaps lost in translation
I never realized what it meant,
To lose your innocence
And the feeling of playing catch up,
When the train had left the station.

When the heart move,
the world does too.
Closing my eyes,
Is the world still here?
Closing the world eyes,
Am I still there?
Open eyes is truth,
Closed eyes is false.
Is my eyes truth,
Or is the world's eyes false?

This is not just a tangible cold
But a chill in the heart
To say goodbye and love from afar
For the very one you held so dear
Became the root cause of many a fear
One never knows you're in the eye of the storm
Until you escape and look back
From the other side of the mirror
Things have now become clear
Uproot and cast away
The naysayers who sowed pitfalls in your way
Yet bid such not a bitter farewell
For hiding underneath that glossy shell
Unveiled a serpent you thought you knew so well

Sean Achilleos
April 4th, 2020

Sometimes the one closest to you is your biggest enemy...