row, row —row the rock, roll it up the hill
fall, fall —fall, fall —it tumble down on me
row, row —row it up, responsibility.
oh no, oh no —I failed at it again.
i try, i try —I always try my best
oh no, oh no — it is never enough

I held myself to you,  
Desperate to fit to your curves  
And push myself into your gaps.  
I hid at your center
When you were mostly edges,  
Still filling in the spaces around you.  
All your pieces jumbled and piled together  
Waiting for you to dive into them  
And fit each fragment along your lines
Piecing together your parts.  

Each piece betraying me more.  
Calling me out as an imposter  
As I tried to hide my edges from you,  
Carve off my corners and make me round.  
Fearing as your shape emerged
You would realize I didn’t fit  
Within your borders,
Discarding me for a piece that did.  
And I i would see your puzzle  
Complete    
Without me.

sub standard, expect
wrong eyes and damaged
no checks
judged and jealous
at being the difference
you couldn't fill us
without my sanctity
i'd swallow
and until it bends
im the pillow
it bites and i learn to cry
hunting my own mountains
she will have learned saying goodbye's

goodbye's the way i see
one day i can learn to breath
hates the day i ran my mouth down
down to the inner city

then he went an gave up
drinking all the garbage
sips out of his ***** gulp's
freelancing ain't what you hear from
it's earth, sun
remember she aint your mum

call me out, outside into the ***** fields to run

Her voice like a song
Running its fingertips through my hair
Ivory chords and wind blowing
Orange-coloured like that of dawn
Soft like a laugh and syrup

Her music isn’t just noises, and all along
It twists and dances like spells in the air
Emerald notes and feeling flowing
Blue-coloured like the sand and sea’s bond
Sweet like love as you try to keep up

She swings bright and long
Skipping in the sky with me, kind and fair
Quartz singing and so much heart showing
Violet-coloured like the rest of them, gone
Short like time we have, siphoned from our cup

But I’m a cacophony compared to her song
It’s all just noises and all along
I cry when I fall, harsh and long
I’m a cacophony when compared to her song

But I can’t hear the music playing in my hair
It’s angled and tripping over all of the air
I see what she sees, but it’s mean and not fair
I can’t hear the music that plays in my hair

But I fail and it’s dusk when she is the dawn
It’s low tide and the water breaks its bond
I run and I scream and my sound is gone
I fail and it’s dusk when she’d rather be dawn

But I prefer plain and not sticky sweet syrup
It’s hard to try but I must and I cannot give up
I wish for a drink, but from my still empty cup
I am quite plain and not sticky sweet syrup.

While I was trying to find
where love could be
Love had come
           A thousand times
and I failed to see

Miserable miserable
i was
I am
N
I would

The holding of tears
Eventually dropping like icebergs

Rocks rocks rocks
They sound like rocks
They feel like rocks
They hurt like rocks

How coldness n strength
Changed into warmth n weakness

I followed your light
Worshiped your bright
Through deep n pain
How can i stop the rain

I kept it inside
You threw it aside

We played hide and seek
But only i seek

They said for the sake of love
They said for the sake of redemption

I used to cross my battles
I used to sharpen my dagger  
Now I redeemed my soul
N covered my sword

Those were new
I barley knew

I thought i’m tough
But it was rough

Now we have no tears left
Will cry it blood
We won’t make it stop

This heart is rotten
Filled with brok’n
Kitting it string by string
Oh where did the melody of them go
Oh where did the red in them go