Love Your Father & Forgive His Mistakes [1]

Had to become a man,
before I learned to become a Good Son,
for your father is your father so show him some love,
& like it or not in this live you usually only get one,

I mean without your father you wouldn't even be here,
I mean without your father you wouldn't even be you,
so what part of “Love your father.” don't you understand,
& how can I get that part through to you?

See you are the fruit of His labors,
you are His seed that was sown,
& the fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree,
so learn from His mistakes & you won’t have to learn from your own,

see your Father is not perfect,
none of us ever were are or will be,
but He is indeed your Father,
so please treat him with some dignity,
please show Him some respect,
& unconditional love,
& the next time you see him,
please from me give him a hug,
because your father is your father,
& you usually only get one,
& I know he made some mistakes but he’s only human,
& the best thing you can do is love Him & forgive them,

for forgiveness heals,
& holding a grudge is carcinogenic,
so liberate yourself through forgiveness of self,
& forgiveness of all others as well for forgiveness is collective repentance,

no need to hold all that resentment in,
we’re all only imperfect humans but there's beauty in our imperfections,
& sure the Road to Hell is paved with good intentions,
but only through cardinal sin do we find true redemption,

& it’s the smudges in the paint,
that creates the masterpiece,
it’s the past & all it’s pain,
that makes us to evolve & finally attain peace,

our art is our art,
let’s not let our mistakes make us,
most of all of this is uncertain anyways & full of mistakes,
but make no mistake you & I are destined for greatness,

& always remember that the masterpiece has a life of it’s own,
it's not owned by anyone not even the one who paints it,
just like a father does not own his son,
even if He's the one that made him,

& you are a masterpiece so give a thanks & an amen,

& then,
be here as we are as human beings,
collectively having a human experience,
moving seeing hearing breathing,

see if you're always dwelling on the past,
or looking ahead to the future,
you won't find me either then or there,
because I'm right here now for sure,

& when you finally find a way to find your self presently,
it will be as amazing as awaking in a dream,

I mean it’s 2018,
what the heck do you mean,
it seems we’ve become the whole scene,
or so it would seem since wherever we're seen becomes the whole scene,

so paint me a picture of what your Soul sees,
express it in any form you choose to work with,
sure the Saints are great but Love is our Savior solely,
& our only true Father is the one that gave us Life’s gift,

use His gift wisely,
use it through music dance laughter & words,
remember random acts of kindness are to be seen,
& unconditional beauty is to be heard,

with your ears you can see,
with your eyes you can hear everything,

everywhere,

where are we let’s take some time to be,
let’s check in with each other let’s forgive past regrets,

forgive & live live & let live,
be in peace & please let us be,
see we are poets we are painters that don't wish to be disturbed,
writing words that paint pictures of what all our Souls see,

see you have to become a man,
before you can learn to become a Good Son,
for your father is your father so show him some love,
& like it or not in this live you usually only get one,

& yes I know He is scarred,
& yes I know you see your future mistakes in his past,
& yes I know sometimes when you see him,
you just wish he’d hurry up & pass,
but when he’s gone you will miss him,
this much I can promise you,
because when he’s gone you’ll have a hole in your heart,
because in some ways your Father is you,
& you can always tell someone’s character,
by the way they treat their parents,
so be as thankful to them as you are to Life itself & respect them,
because without them you wouldn’t have been born,

so please show Him some respect,
& give him unconditional love,
& the next time you see him,
please from me give him a hug...

∆ Aaron LaLux ∆

from The Holy Trilogy Vol. 2: Mandalas
available worldwide here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1721134158

Did you know that if you leave your car in your driveway,
With the keys in the ignition,
And someone sits down in the front seat like they own it, and drives away,
You are the one who is liable for theft?
They can drive that sucker to the coast.
They can burn the upholstery with their cigarettes. They can bring their friends into the back seat, and fill the compartments with their refuse, and ****, and they can leave it ruined in front of your house, or crushed into the median on the highway, or left in disconnected pieces under an overpass.
It will be called, “unauthorized use of a vehicle.”
It will be called a “misdemeanor.”
But you left the car running.
Weren't you kind of asking for it to happen?

They said,
This,
(Gesturing to the skirt which fell to two inches
above my kneecap),
Is like that.

If I walk outside of my house in jeans and a t-shirt, or a long dress with thin straps,
Or with my chin tilted out,
Or with long eyelashes,
Or with full lips,
Or with my hips swaying when I walk,

It's like I left the car running.

It's like I invited them to force their bodies into the front seat.
In their minds, or with their hands, or with their lips to anyone who would listen to them.

Little girls in leotards become like unlocked car doors;
Where men can burn their cigarettes into their skin,
Or stick their fingers in
In plain view of their parents,
And told to let it happen,
Quietly.
It isn't theft,
It's “a medical examination.”

What did they expect?
It isn't a theft.
She was just as guilty of negligence.
It isn't really a felony.
It's not THAT BAD. (Stop being so dramatic.)
It's the unauthorized use of your body, for a time, or one night,
or every time you close your eyes for the rest of your life,

Sure-

But you left the car running.

I am afraid of speaking.
I am afraid of the texture of my voice, and the effect it will have on you.
I don't want to be pressed into the caricature of an angry woman; voice raised in what they call a hysterical display of emotion.
Calm down. Be rational.

Stop being
So
Dramatic.

Well let me tell you something:
I am an angry woman.

Because all I can see is my best friend’s blonde head, coming within an inch of becoming the crushed drywall beneath his fist.
All I can see is the false piety painted on his pastor’s face, asking, “well… did he hit you?”

I see her eyes closed in the darkness, fingers gripped in the sheets he tore off of her body to wake her. She has to hold on to something.
He says, “Show me you're enjoying it.”


Calm down. Be rational.

Like he wasn't gaining access INTO her BODY by FORCE. Like, of course it's her job to lay down and take it. Like it. Lick his lips for the taste of honey, because honey, he told you to.

but it's poison. It enters her bloodstream, weakening her will to resist it.

She looks at her phone, at a text she did not compose herself, or send,
“Hey hot stuff. When you see this, let's have ***.
“If I pretend I didn't write this I'm just playing hard to get.”

Do you get it?

Yeah. I am an angry woman.

Stay calm, dear sister. Be rational.
Rationalize the gaslighting, because the big picture doesn't look beautiful when you hang it above the sofa; and her home was staged to look like a family so that when you look in the window, you don't see that she was a hostage.
You don't see that her son was asleep in the bed when he grabbed her face between his hands and crushed it,
And called it “gently redirecting her gaze.”

From the window, you can't see his body blocking the exit.
You can't see her baby, with his little fingers curled around her *******, begging for comfort.

I will not calm down. And in case you are so damaged by devotion to comfort that you can't see it, it is right to be angry.

It is righteous.

I am angry, and more rational than I have ever been in my entire life- rationally, righteously begging for justice to flow down like rivers.

I am an angry woman.

In the past we were otherworldly

But when you get
Older
Bolder
Sainer
I remember everything you have done.

Burning like embers concentrated.
Falling tinder yelling frustrations.
I consume everything you are.

Smoke rising up like pillars in the sky
Thought you were sleeping
Safe and sound, burning in my arms.

Instead, you were gone.

When I gave you shelter with my fire
Ended up suffocating all of my love
Left me smoldering with a broken heart.

Tendrils of smoke slowly dancing.
Ashes floating from deception.
You were nothing after all.

Now we are
Plainer
Colder
Bitter
After you broke this spell with all of your doubt.

Guess we were human after all.



© Sofia Villagrana 2018