Remember
How you became
When you wanted
To hurt me
The souvenirs
On my skin
Red, purple
And black
The truth is
I would have
Worn the bruises
As a jewel
Gifted by you
But not anymore
As I pulled out
All the stuffing
From inside of you
Like a rag doll
And rested you
Deep…
Down…

She is a young girl
Who cry tears to sleep
In darkness her body curls
Falling apart as she weeps.

It is not the first time
The lullaby she heard
It has been quite a while
Since she last laughed.

Screaming of a woman
Beaten by her husband
In the night of suburban
Her body bleeding wound.

The girl musters up courage
Runs while he hits the wife
Break into neighbor’s place
Plea for dear mother’s life.

Police arrive in minutes
He is caught for violence
Finding mother’s heartbeats
Have gone in silence.

Oh no!
Here she comes again.
Mom please!
I don't want to fight.
Please stop yelling.
I didn't take your food.
I swear.

I'm not listening to this.
I walk away.
Mom!
What are you doing?
Why did you put my head through the wall.

I punch, I kick.
I fight back.
Why are you choking me?
I bite her arm.

My aunt calls the police.
Four officers break up the fight.
Why am i being cuffed.
Why isnt she going too?
I didn't do anything wrong.

The detective questions me.
I spend three days in county jail.
The district attorney finally drops the charges.
Now I have to go back to her.

Please Lord let me live.
I promise to do good.
I'll change I promise.
Please don't let me die.

You told me I was beautiful
Then you told me I was a *****
You told me you could change me
That you would leave me begging for more
You told me that you loved me
And left me lying on the floor

I told myself you were wrong
I told myself I was strong
It wasn’t me
It was you all along
But doubt is a heavy burden
You left me very uncertain
Behind closed curtains
I believed you when you said
No one else would want me

If you loved me
How could it hurt so much?
I told you to do it
You’d convinced me my life wasn’t worth enough
I was careless
So you hit me,
I was hopeless
So you broke me,
I won’t forgive you
But I choose to forgive myself

Lather, rinse, repeat.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Soak, wash, repeat.
Sweep, sweep, repeat.
Wipe, wipe, repeat.
Scrub, scrub, repeat.
Dice, dice, repeat.
Wipe, dry, repeat.
The tears that are good.
Pour, stir, repeat.
Open the door.
Serve the food.
Greet, greet the guests.
Smile, talk, repeat.
Say bye-bye, repeat.
Massage, press, repeat.
Yelp in pain.
Grab your abdomen.
Rub, press, repeat.
Let the sari unwrap.
Shake your head no.
Oh oh.
Run, hide, cry, plead.
Rub your stinging cheek.
Sob, sob, repeat.
Dab, dab, repeat.
The tears that are deserved.
Press your straining scalp.
Grab tight the bed sheet.
Groan, hiss , repeat.
Fake, fake, repeat.
Pain, pain.
Again!
Sore, sore, all over.
Go make a drink and then,
Massage, press, repeat.
Pick up the nephew.
Ignore the daughter’s lies.
Pat, pat repeat.
Put him down to sleep.
Sing the lullabies.
See your daughter writhe.
Writhe, writhe, repeat.
Kiss your daughter’s hand.
Feel her skin burning.
Watch your daughter weep,
Cry herself to sleep.
One drop down then two.
The tears that are meaningless.
Lie down as if asleep.
Twist, turn, repeat.
Wake up before dawn.
Now, you put on.
Red, green, black and gold.
Vermillion, bangles, beads.
Lather, rinse, repeat.

you tell me you yell
because you love me
you tell me you hit me
because you care,
you want the best for me

yet, you become so alarmed
when i tell you he hits me because he loves me
with each blow he loves me more
why are you so alarmed that he cares for
and he loves me the way you did, dad.

From the time I was a little girl,
I feared love.
I had seen my parents fight
and I thought to myself that
no man was worth it.
No man was worth being
slammed to the ground.

As I grew older,
boys tried to pursue me
and I put up my guard,
thinking that if love is
having bruises all over your body,
then I do not want it–
not even a little bit.

However, when you came around
you showed me something new.
Not every man is my daddy.
In fact, you are the man that my
daddy wishes he could be.
All my dad wanted was to show love,
but he never knew how.  

You radiate the sun
and make me feel loved.
You make me feel beautiful
and special and happy.
You are the reason I love
love and I do not fear it.
I crave it.

The true essence of a woman
has never truly been understood
From the Spanish demolishing our cultures
to the way that they are viewed and treated in the hood.

I don't like the use of the word *****
Whether you're rich or poor
upper or middle class
or a ******* lying in a ***** ditch

In our indigenous tribal times
women were respected, revered and held in a high regard
the damage from a European psychology
has pierced our mindsets and left men and society deeply scarred

Try to keep you dumb, barefoot, and pregnant in the kitchen wishing,
while he is out there acting a fool
trying to be a player straight fishing

I'm talking about a  species that not only can bear a life
but a being that can hold a job
help with homework, cook, and be a **** wife

Or maybe baby daddy was never really there
or maybe he's stuck in the judicial system
in a cell staring at the wall with a blank stare

Single strong mama doing it all by her self
playing the mother and father
being the comforter and still having to pull out the belt

Tu-pacs dear mama was real and said it the best
until you've grown up with a single mother
you're probably tripping like the rest

I love you, respect you
and truly understand your pain
don't trip mami, I see you and all that work
that you have put in is not in vain

Keep grinding and working hard
continue to do all that you can
I feel you're and got your back
I'm your number one fan

And if your man doesn't appreciate you
and treat you like the Queen that you are
My advice, ditch the punk, be on your own
or find a king that treats you like a true superstar.