"Are you Okay?"
I'm not even sad.
"So what are you?"
God, I make myself mad.

Yeah, that's what I am,
I'm angry, *"At what?"
Shut up! If I knew…
"Lots would change. Not."

Maybe that's what I need.
"A change, that'll work."
Exactly, and if I'm lucky,
It'll wipe off your smirk.

"I'm not laughing."
Not at me, with me, correct?
"Well not exactly."
You understand that you're in my head?

That's it. It's all in my head.
"Except the scars on each inch of your skin."
That's different, I had to feel…
"Feel what? To what end?"

Feel SOMETHING! Anything…
"Anything at all?"
Yes. "And what if you don't?"
Upon the floor I will crawl.

Crawl into a hole.
"A hole in the ground?"
And have it filled up with dirt,
Never to be found.

"You're giving up."
I'm living all wrong.
"You're pathetic."
**So they've been right all along.

I don't believe you.

I don't subscribe to your thoughts
and the words that trickle out
of your head, to fall ******
on the pavement and disappear
down the gutter when
the rain comes.

I hope the rain comes soon.

A raging, rampant monsoon
to flood me dry and clean away
the raw, red finger-prints your diction
imprinted, a blood-red necklace ringing my throat.

I don't care for your intonation.

You, heedless of the power
of speeches simple sounds that decimate
veins and rupture explosive, ebony vessels,
setting me adrift on Moses' sea.

But, despite all, I reply in kind.

And
careless words leave me;
cutting you open.

Fractured mind;
tattered soul;
a body in ruin —
that’s me.

Morbid thoughts;
frozen heart;
bloated fingers —
that’s me.

Despair and hope.
Love and hate.
Cruel tenderness —
that’s me.

A smoking gun,
a flawed someone
perfectly imperfect —
that’s what I want.

I guess you can call me ****** up
Because there is nothing in me
That is pure enough to touch
That is not broken
That is not tainted by the feeling of hurt
Confusement
Or angst
There is betrayal in me
Sadness
And anger
So leave the ****** up little being
In her cloud of broken dreams

but i know there's no ghost on this island
cause his hands would be all covered in bud
not much else but a sight for the red eyed
a reality that seems real enough

everything you could want you can find by the beach
but after the music stops it seems everything dies
I've had my fun but I know its so empty
think i’ll just lay here until the sunrise

the dark waves of the night try to calm me
a drunk drag, lungs swell with liquid black
drowning in these thoughts on this island
hoping the waves will carry me back

Drip, drop
Until my heart stops
Bleeding with a meaning
I know they've been deceiving me

Don't stop
Fueling my addiction
I feed on all the tension and pain that I've been given.

My life
Caught up in a daydream
Pretending that I'm mainstream
Until they found the blood stains.

That knife
I don't know how it got there
Its sharp; my feeling: unclear
I just know I can't stay here

Inside me
There's so much that I've hidden
Constantly stumbling on decisions
Regret knows something's missing

Tick tock**
Time is leaving me behind
The clock is laughing at me
Im stuck on pause and can't rewind