You get up every morning
Without any idea how things would go
You have thoughts that are conflicting
Asking for answers you still don't know

Then you slowly start your day
With a cup of coffee and some music to take the sleepiness away
You open your phone and scroll through the news feed
Seeing tons of things you don't actually need

You see how good the life of other people are
Then all of a sudden, you compare your life with theirs
You feel sad and think that you are not living a good life
Then little by little, tears form in your eyes

My friend, please don't get me wrong
But your life might be great already
You just can't see it
Because you're focused on someone else's

Everyone that has ever said that they love me
All those who've mentioned that I'm their one and only
That their desire is to be with me, hand in hand for our eternity
All those who've told me that they care about me deeply
But have otherwise only ever proven to be phony
Compassion is something never aloud to me
History is rewritten by present and past company
Because when it comes down to the nitty gritty
I'm just a stepping stone obviously
I mean hell, just look at my track record then back at me
Don't even need a degree in forensic diplomacy
Actions speak loudly
Leaving me stuck in an unwanted and completely unnecessary purgatory
But no one cares about a no guts, no glory type story
No one cares how their actions have affected my energy
Turning me, molding me into the evil reflection that won't stop staring back at me
All sides have proven extensively that I am unworthy of being wanted, forget loving unconditionally
All I've ever wanted was to be somebody's somebody
But everybody says the same thing to me openly
No friendly faces and behind their smiles is a judgement and verdict of guilty
So I struggle with the fact that somehow they all agree
If the problem isn't me it at least resides in me
I've got a penny, two maybe,
We'll find the appropriate line to walk eventually
I just hope there'll be someone left standing next to me
Because an eternity is a long time to spend lonely

©2024

I do this to myself
Accept fights I could never win

Search for ways to disprove
What I've sought all of my days

Hurl myself into the ring
A luchador with something to prove

The fight rages on
And I lose my will

In fear and self doubt
I sabotage my win

Allowing the opponent that is my mind
To deliver that last fateful blow