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Broken Light,
  shattered nights,
My blight with which I dance and weave.

To and fro,
   my wonderlust flows.
My fascination with the fight.


The shortest distance between peace and I,

Is through Hell.

~Robert van Lingen
Over-Complicated Dec 2018
I sit
Stare
Wonder of the things that aren't here but are somewhere else.
Beige ceilings feel small when you stare at them all the time.
There's a sky beyond the plaster-
A dark sky that's full of animals and stars and clouds and noise.
Yet here I am
With nothing but the white noise of a heater and a faint ringing in my ears.
I think of all the time I waste thinking.

I could learn a different language.
Being able to speak to someone in many different cultures and continents would be interesting.

I could practice guitar or piano, learn a new instrument, create new music.
I love the way music twists and spills from my fingers like an ethereal waterfall.

I could draw and create a masterpiece.
Acrylic flows through my veins and keeps my heart pumping.
Watercolor dyes my body and my hair,
Washing me over in a wave of bright color.
Chalk dusts my skin, leaving me with a blurred finish.

I could exercise.
It would surely boost my poor self image.
I constantly look in the mirror and see a hideous shell.

Mending relationships and talking would fantastic,
A splendid way to make good use of my time.
A way to use my present to correct my past and improve the future.

Studying would be a good thing to do, as well.
The great me knows that my grades sure do need it.
I cannot deliver disappointment to my parents.

Maybe I could work, earn some more money
More money makes mankind merrier;
So it appears, money makes man merry.
I'd be contributing to my society and be making use of my time.

OR...

or...

I could continue to stare at a blank canvas above me,
Smooth as silk,
And I can think of all the things I could be doing right now
Instead of actually doing them
Because America is a nation of dreamers,
Not doers.
Oh such a pompous ruckus
Would not silence be better?
Sour grapes you say; maybe so
But A little quiet is all I ask.
A little wine?  well maybe just
A little.    How was it?  Good.
Maybe just a little more.  Now?
Good .  So no sour grapes?  I
Say sour grapes be ******. This
Is wine.  Let me have some more.
Good stuff this.  I think now I can
Hear  His song...His  Truth is Marching
On and i hear my soul Going with Him
And I will listen until ... stillness speaks
His  name...for there is no other I hear
And I shall make a joyful noise unto Him
Wherefore Now I am singing His Song
Is it not for His Glory that I am strong
I can hear I will Hear  I can sing I will
Sing a song that has no end to my Love

For Old  41. and the People of Navisota
who saw him pass on the train 12.6.2018
ake
helios Dec 2018
MY (MILD TO MODERATE DEPRESSION IS ACTING UP AGAIN) PENCIL BROKE

AND MY (ANXIETY NEVER EVEN WENT AWAY) PENCIL WON'T SHARPEN

AND , BY GOD , ALL I ASK FOR IS (ANY IDEA OF WHAT MY FUTURE WOULD HOLD. FOR I CANNOT STAND THIS TEDIOUS WAIT BETWEEN GOOD AND BAD, JOY AND PAIN, I'LL YELL AND I'LL LAUGH AND THEY'LL FEEL THE SAME) A ******* PENCIL WITH LEAD THAT DOESN'T SMASH WHEN I PRESS HARDER THAN A ******* BABY WHEN IT GNAWS ON THE FINGERS OF ITS LARGE BREASTED MOTHER

anger , haha. anger who? my name is blueberry bubblegum and i exist only to chew. nom nom.

:-)
**** **** ****!

don't swear.....the children are listening

they'll hear it eventually

well....the children must grow up someday, i suppose

**** **** ****!

**** **** ****!
choco is late Dec 2018
Within the Crevices of Our Hearts
lies an Unheard Symphony
that's been Trapped, Chained and Locked
brought by Fears and Doubts
may it Break Free
and Tug People's Core
Be brave and let the music within be heard
Colm Nov 2018
Struck speechless
Stretched for words I am
As I have never been
This close to you
And all I can do I can do is grin
All I Can Do, Around You

HondaGirlSeries
There was a tiny tea light somewhat hid and tucked away
Was lost; To be forgotten in dark corners of my brain
The other day you called me breathing into it new life
A weak and dying flame now once again stood strong and bright

Tried quelling it with reason; Doused with plenty rationale
No matter what I threw at it would not leave or dispel
Use thoughts as tools or weapons; They are thrown out by the mind
Attempting to slice through the bonds to flame the heart did bind

But no where in my cognition is something quite that tough
In any way could **** that flame or from these bonds be cut
This statement even would be true the weakest of its days
But as I'm talking to you with each word you fan the flame

Was living out a lie and yet was unbeknownst to me
I thought my love for you could die if left and just let be
However, now I know too well this lasting present truth
My eyes saw you and ever since, I've been in love with you
Written: October 23, 2018

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[Iambic Heptameter format]
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