Do you miss me like I do? Do you cry at the thought of those days? Do you regret having met me? Does it hurt when one mentions my name? I'm told you're not worth tears, But how do I stop them It's so strange how someone mends a shattered heart, Breaks it again, like its nothing, Someone you knew so much, Becomes a stranger to you, The most painful part is... How do I tell my friends that you left, Without reason, How do I stop missing my past, When trust was not an issue, Cause I'm scared of crashing again, I'm scared of meeting new people, I'm scared of moving on, The past feels better than my future, But I can't blame anyone When I gave the chance,
This stream of my consciousness Is brought to you by The polluted wounds of Unreconciled love for myself
I never rip Band-Aids off Because I never put them on I was too busy healing the scrapes And bumps and bruises On another person’s arm
When I stopped writing poetry I found all my cuts Buried deep under my skin Into a layer of unforgiveness
Sometimes my heart can beat so fast I begin to feel alive again But I’m scared of what else I could feel I had to accept the thought of feeling it all again
Rose water and palo santo can only go so far When the deepest scars Aren’t even visible
I’ve never been hurt more by Anyone besides myself And I’ve never been loved more by Anyone besides myself
And my hashtag self love routine Isn’t always bubble baths and body positivity It’s the analyzation of my human existence Including my flaws and my worst characteristic And sometimes I have to break my own heart In order to become more than a wound
My countenance made love with the harsh earth she left me bruised confused and bloodied with a couple days plucked out of my memory thank whoever is above for the few buddies that pulled me to the corner with a flashlight bag of cold ice shoulder rubs and words of advice I got back in the ring ready for to resume the fight I learned that night that you can't beat Gaia but that you could endure a few rounds.
Just kidding, I was knocked out during the first round.
My tiredness consumes me. Im tired of life, of waking up and only finding disappointment. Im not tired cause ima another lazy teen, Im not tired because i was on my phone, Im tired because my body is weak and broken from all the beatings its taken to this point. My tiredness consumes me.
To my family who thinks im just tired cause im another lazy teen rebelling.
Life is so brutal It mangles the heart Beaten and bruised From the very start In a world fallen From its original glory We need to bring Jesus Back to the story His voice will heal And mend your soul If you give him the time He can make you whole Each day is a chance To let him touch you If you open your heart His words will renew