Pull me to the cliff that overlooks all lands,
show me where I belong;

not the village no, it's cold and grim
I'd glue to a web of roaring gossip
like a fly was nestling on my wall.

The city? Ah! It's selfish and brandished
where status weasels-in seasonal friends,
sweet to the tongue but antigenic to the body.

The coast, malleable!
vast waters harbor stillth memories
soft waves pull me into sentiment
and the water surface echoes strength of earthly bonds.

You ask where I belong?

I belong on that cliff, looking at the world
knowing they won't look back.

(tw; abandonment)

I don't belong.

First thought:
This is sweeping generalization,
an overdramatization of the truth,
the truth that everyone belongs somewhere .
Everyone has a place, a purpose,
a reason for being here, and if you were put
on this godforsaken Earth in the first place,
you belong somewhere.

Second thought:
What even does belonging mean?
It's just a word, belonging,
a word we assign meaning to,
a word that really means nothing.

Third thought:
Here we go again.
Millennials and their **** whining,
always whining about nothing.
attention-seeking, that's what this is,
just attention-seeking, nothing more.
If you want a place to belong,
you can **** well find it on your own.
Take some **** initiative.

Fourth thought:
You're overreacting.
You're reading into things,
seeing things that aren't there
No one dislikes you, you're fine,
if they didn't want you around,
they wouldn't have invited you.

Fifth thought:
Oh god.
They hate me.
Oh god.
Just keep making weird noises,
keep getting them to laugh.
If they laugh, it's fine.
Everything's fine.

you held me close to you,
and I felt your heart beating
deep inside of your rib cage.

I closed my eyes and listened
to the rise and fall of your chest,
hearing the soft thump of
your heartbeat and imagining
that if I stayed still for long enough,
I could melt into you.

for the first time in my life,
I felt like I belonged.

you made me feel like
I belonged with you

like I belonged on this planet.

like I belonged here, right here,
secure in your arms.

I haven’t felt safe
since you let go of me.

you can't go back to dem buildings
let it be, hashtag smorky, snakes
from the face of the heavens it's
a quiet view, this place feels like home

you can't go back there, tribulations
you know the mentality of cockroaches
you know their game and you know mine
you're standing on your own, decide

who could they possibly ask to fight?
energy, loaded brain, muscle flex
bullet holes, wild roses and benzes  
a quiet view, this place feels like home

who could possibly burn the struggle down?
in the voice of the enemy, you hear yourself
too many will fall, too many will collapse
you're standing on your own, my friend

i met a girl and tried to kiss her
but at nighttime, we standing on our own
we be watching old jack, showing off
heavy necklaces, king of gold bracelets

old jack had approcached us like a wizard
and showed her and me his palm lines
she looked at them and guessed: a butcher
old jack smiled, a smile filled with home

Wind throws itself through my clothes,
tossing my hair and cooling the sweat of the climb
from my burning, beating body.
I am here. I am where I need to be -
high above the crowds and the clouds,
alone and utterly free.
There is much to see
but little to do,
and earthly troubles melt away
amidst these towering peaks.

It is mine, I declare.
But no, only in the mountains
do you finally realize
that nothing belongs to you.

I wonder where,
Where I call home.
I’m uncomfortable with others,
With their ersatz shallow ways,
Except those few sweet few.
I prefer most my own company
Away from the many,
The contradictions, the confusion, the overload of senses.
Its so much easier that way.
No worry.  
Be myself,
Without fear
Of treading on eggshells
Lest I put my foot in it,
once again,
Saying wrong things,
Being judged,
Being criticised.
Just for being.

But I’m lonely too,
That lack of connection,
To others
and myself.
I pretend.
I keep busy.
I have no time to feel.
I pass absently
And joylessly
through a life
Of empty
Disconnection,
Discombobulation,
With a heavy weight upon my back.
Tis sad.
Tis a waste.
Till a fall from sweet grace.
From what we are sent here to do.
Spread love.
Be love.
Love all.
Love you.
Love me.

I left home
Aged 10
Put on a bus and away I went
Gone to oblivion
Into the void
Mum standing on the platform
Growing smaller as the bus drove away
Already gone.
Now a man, I return to that bus
Where that boy should have never been.
I take him in my arms
And hold him,
I will not let him go!
He can come home to me,
Stay with me in my home-heart.
We can be together, friends, brothers, partners, companions at arms.
You are safe now with me my boy!
I will not let you go.