Every thought I have is fuelled by you.
You're my sun during the day.
My moon at night.
And neither could exist without the other.
Just like us.
And I love you.
I hate to admit it and so I don't.
But I need you.
And you are the night sky and I am the stars.
And I can't shine without you.
You complete me.
You are me.
And I am you.
We are one.
If I could steal a star from the sky for you I would.
And you make me feel so high I can almost reach.
But I'd rather be back down on earth with you.
The beat of my heart intensified by my feelings of love for you.
So much love for you.
Adoration.
I'm in awe every time I see you.
And this love will never fade.
Because when a writer falls in love, that story never dies.
I skipped so many parts of your story and I missed you.
I missed us.
I can read you like a book that I want to rewrite with me on every page.
And I know I make you feel like the villain sometimes.
I expect the worst.
I'm afraid to lose you again.
I hope for the best.
But life has a habit of getting worse before it gets better.
Getting harder.
Hold on for me.
We can write our happy ending together.
And you can fall asleep in my arms each night to the sound of the poetry that my love for you has created.
I was made for you.
And you fit me better than anything that was made to measure.
Your hand fits in mine like the piece of my heart that I gave to you used to fit inside my body.
The part I watched you walk away with.
But you came right back.
And you can keep it.
Take it all.
For as long as I can keep you and beyond. My heart is yours.

It's a feeling of...of respect.
I don't think of them as friends.
I can't think of them as conquests.
They're above that, above me, above you.

In fact; it's more like awe.
It's more like being struck stupid
In the face of a star.
Except that's not quite right....

Imagine you meet your favorite idol
But you don't know it's them
But something about them calls your soul
And your body, until you become friends.

And it turns out they're absolutely unreal
It turns out they're...they're amazing
That's how they make me feel
That's how I see them

I can't just hug them like I do my other friends
And I can't just talk to them like they aren't beyond human
I can't just smile at them, can't pretend
Because they're everything I've never knew I wanted for me.

I always wonder why it is
That seeing someone else's tears
Creates such awe in me.
I want to ease your pain
But I am also
Transfixed by it.

The mask slips
When people cry.
The seams rip
And all of a sudden parts of them
That are never meant to be seen
Writhe in the light,
Raw and agonized and
Beautiful
As hell.
I do mean that- hell.
It is both
Divine and perverse
To witness someone else's pain.
I always hold my breath
As if I could shatter their soul
Just with the knife's edge of my gaze.

When you cry
Most people politely look away
For their own comfort
And tug their disguises closer,
Check their pinnings
Reminded of their fragility
By the gauche display
Of yours.

When you cry
I
Freeze like a photograph
And I see you as a child
I see you as a god
I see you
As a rainstorm reaching its fingers across
All the ugly concrete and glass we build
And getting inside
Underneath
To make the trees bloom.
When you cry
I see you like I see a painting
Hung in a museum so quiet you want to hush your heartbeat
Just to keep the stillness electric.
When you cry
You are so bright that when I glance at you
And look away
I am blind for a moment.

There is something about seeing that loss of control in another person
That one second of utter truth
The brutal, consuming honesty that comes with tears
That reaches inside, for those who dare let it,
And wounds exquisitely.
There is a bare second
When the part of them that recoils from the light
Clasps shriveled hands with the answering piece of you
And both hurt-
To see and to be seen
But that moment
Reminds you that you are alive
And
Why.

Beautiful

Darling you are beautiful.
Not just ordinary-sort-of-beautiful either.
It's not for everyone to enjoy,
Tis not to everyone's taste,
But it is there:
Ineffable beauty.
And it begs to be loved.
I would do so gladly,
Tracing your face's outline
Like it is a piece of art work,
Or the full moon in the sky.
It is so specific. So very you:
Beauty like no other.
You can't see it sometimes
Because it hides behind your smile
And sits above your raised brows.
It likes to daydream at times
In the crooks of your curls,
And takes a nap on your nose.
As a master of disguise,
It plunges into your eyes,
And finds there warm sea water.
It is a little timid maybe,
But with a few kind thoughts
You could lure it out
Into your own
Observable universe.