Sometimes my mind flies away, leaving my body behind.
I look around the room, I’m so confused.
Who are these people? Why am I here?
It’s a bit too late, because they can’t relate.
What’s happening to me? Why do I want to flee?
Oh, this makes me hide, with no one by my side.
My mind is wondering so fast; here comes a flashback.

Why is he playing these games, and calling me names?
Though he’s not so bright, he surely can fight.
He knows my triggers, so go figure,
He manipulates me, and watches me freeze.
His hands are so smooth, as he makes his move.
Pins me down to the ground; I begin to frown.
He looks into my eyes, as I begin to cry.
I try to tell him to stop, but it was a huge flop.
He seemed so cool; God, I’m such a fool.

Sometimes my mind flies away, leaving my body behind.
I look around the room; I’m so confused.
Who are these people? Why am I here?
It’s a bit too late, because they can’t relate.
What’s going on with me? Why do I want to flee?
Oh, this makes me hide, with no one by my side.
My mind is wondering so fast; here comes a flashback.

I’m in a deep sleep; but I hear a peep.
He’s at it again; I already hate men.
I wish I can move; so that I can prove,
I don’t want to be touched; please, this is a bit too much.

Sometimes my mind flies away, leaving my body behind.
I look around the room, I’m so confused.
Who are these people? Why am I here?
It’s a bit too late, because they can’t relate.
What's going on with me? Why do I want to flee?
Oh, this makes me hide, with no one by my side.
My mind is wondering so fast; here comes a flashback.

We’re arguing again; it’s half past ten.
He comes up from behind, kinda like a grind.
Tightly grasping me, I fell to my knee.
Begging him to stop, treating me like a prop.
This is all my fault, for not putting this to a halt.
He’s still holding me, waiting for my mind to flee.
His hand is on my dress, trying to expose my chest.
My heart is pounding, it’s not astounding.
I want to die, even though he’s high.
But, just one more time, won’t be a crime.
It’ll be over soon, just stare at the moon.

Sometimes my mind flies away, leaving my body behind.
I look around the room, I’m so confused.
Who are these people? Why am I here?
It’s a bit too late, because they can’t relate.
What's going on with me? Why do I want to flee?
Oh, this makes me hide, with no one by my side.
My mind is wondering so fast; here comes a flashback.

I’m getting into my car, until I notice a star,
Shining so bright, can this be right?
The time is here, but I’m shaking in fear.
Just look into his eyes, but please don’t cry.
I know he’s cheating, and I’m not foreseeing,
Any future with him; my life is so dim.
So I tell him goodbye, as I fix his tie.
I climb into my car, viewing him from afar.
I’ll never see him again, that’s my big plan.

Sometimes my mind flies away, please not today.
I look around the room, and that’s my cue.
Think about these people, focus on why I’m here.
It’s not too late, maybe they can relate?
I know what’s happening to me, but why do I want to flee?
Still I want to hide, but with very few by my side.
My mind is wondering so fast; I’ll try to avoid the flashback.

What is wrong with you?
Are you a ******?
Have you ever made out with a guy before?
Who said this should mean anything?
Why do you idolise *** so much?
Maybe you never had one as good as me, why don't you let me?
Why are you saying no? I don't understand.
All I need is for you to say yes.

I have heard of your type,
The type that baits it's prey
The type that does not understand the meaning of no
The type that has no respect for the other
The type that has no respect for themselves
The type that no sense of shame or embarrassment
The cunning type, you just never see it coming

You made me feel less of a woman
You made me lose my self confidence
You made me conscious of my body
You gave me the ability to cringe at the sight of men
You taught me to fear
You broke my psyche

I must give it to you, you are good!
You managed to ******* me
NO drugs, NO sedatives, just your words
I felt the need to validate myself to you
The need to please you

I never thought I would meet you
I thought you lived on TV and Facebook posts
That you were not real
But you were around me all this time

How do you feel? Good?
Well, I feel like crap
I feel used

Was that your goal?
Well, you succeeded!

Congratulations Mr Predator!

Boy,
I don't mean to sound like a *****,
But take your arm off my shoulders.
This body is mine.

Don't slide your hand up my leg
Like your fingers are lost and looking for a home.
Don't assume that I want to touch you
This body is mine.

This body,
She has climbed mountains
And swam in the ocean,
Walked through forests and crowds and battles
Like you will never know.

If I am hesitant to be with you,
Know that it is not your right
To be offended.

I am striving to reach
Peace
With this vessel I call home,
I will put her first.

I'm not sorry to tell you:
This body is mine.

On my tongue rests a particular smog
One that scorches my throat
Pollutes my emotions.

I did not willingly inhale
This was forced upon me.

But I will not open my mouth
I will not let the clouds escape
I will let the smoke fall into my lungs
Keeping my from breathing properly.

it's sick, it's ******* sick as ******* plague to wish someone succeeded at suicide but if that's how i'm feeling i can't control it you ******* made me this way
you
i hate you
"you don't know how happy it's made me that we're friends again."
we aren't
we aren't
we aren't friends
you think i want to be friend with you
because i'm nice and if i didn't say yes you would probably threaten to **** yourself or some **** and say what you always say.
"but you've been my reason for living."
just like when i didn't say yes you stuck your fingers into me and breathed heavily and i sat there frozen and with no emotion but i wanted to yell for help.
you ruined my recovery and continue to.
people ask why don't i tell you to go away.
i try but you keep coming back.
like the devil.
do you hear the things you say?
"i tried to **** myself."
"i tried to **** myself and I just wanted someone to talk to."
i said I'm not in the place to hear that right now.
"******* Belle, all you ever do is rub it in my face."
You'll do it again.
i'm always the perpetrator.
i don't want to be friends.
stop talking to me.
i have nightmares of you strangling me and forcing me to do things with you, because this is what you once did.
asking someone to go away is never so simple when they're so obsessive.
i have had a ball and chain around both ankles for so long.

Not sure if you changed your number
Or ignored my texts
But you need to hear this
Remember that **** that happened my senior year?
When you decided that you'd stay alive if I stayed physically involved with you?
And continued to touch me even though I said no?
You better not have forgotten
Because I sure haven't
That is called coercion
Not only is it ****** assault
It is ****
Which makes you a ******
You made me feel so bad for stopping
For no longer letting you use me
That was victim blaming
You placed your supposed 'love' for me
Over my literal existence as a human being
You justified ****** me
By saying you loved me
And that doing it would keep you
From killing yourself
But you didn't realize how much
You were killing me
Just because you love someone
Does not mean they owe you anything
Whether they like you back
Or not
Whether they've hurt you
Or not
You do NOT get to assault people
Just because you think you deserve it
I'm not as mad as I used to be
And I'm only writing this
Because you need to hear it
You need to know you're a ******
So you don't do it ever again

I can't change what you did to me
But you can make sure it NEVER happens again

Voices echoed the room.
Are they mine or yours?
There's no way to know for sure.
I’m no longer in my own body
And completely shaken to my core
My worth brutally contaminated

My bleeding voice chokes on your ability to ignore
my tears which you've acquired a hungry taste for.
You forgot to hide your ugliness under that crooked mask of yours
As you take my innocence as one of your artifacts.
My strength is tangled within your degrading fingers.
It hurts to be strong and try to fight back.
Within an instant, you turned my meaning into nothing.

It hurts to swallow your poison.
I should have seen this coming.
You couldn’t keep your filthy hands to yourself.
My defenses were down, but now I see what you truly are.
I know what you are.