But I remember how you held me
How you took care of me
And when you fell asleep, I stayed awake
Counted your freckles as if it would sober me
I could feel your breath on the back of my neck

All else is a mystery

I shouldn't be up this late
I have work in the morning
I hate my boss
I hate my job
I'd quit if I didn't need the money
But I can't stop the drinking
And I can't shake the feeling
Of you on my lips
I'm cursed forever
With the taste of your kiss
And your hands on my hips

I need someoone to help
Did I tell you I'm drinking
I hate this taste
I say hate too much
Is that why you left me lonely
But I can't stop the drinking
And I can't shake the feeling
Of being alone
I'll guess I'll get use to this
Or at least try
  
Everything feels so strange
And I know I am up too late
But
I'm smoking the buds of your cigarettes
Just to be where your lips have been
I'm only doing this all because I think that I need it
It's as close as I can get to you

Yeah as close as I can get
(As close as I'll ever be)
As close I can get to you

I'm smoking the buds of your cigarettes
The ones you left in the ash tray
During our last conversation
I'm wearing your t shirts
I'm listening to your favorite mix tape
I'm only doing this all because I think that I need it
It's as close as I can get to you

You need not visit right now.
For I wish to stay wide awake
In the arms of my loved one.
And if you were to exhaust me,
I would have to retreat to my own bed.
So please, let me enjoy this.

On my tongue rests a particular smog
One that scorches my throat
Pollutes my emotions.

I did not willingly inhale
This was forced upon me.

But I will not open my mouth
I will not let the clouds escape
I will let the smoke fall into my lungs
Keeping my from breathing properly.

I am reminded of you everywhere I go. I see the bustling people and I think of your busy hands. The color of the air perfectly matches your eyes. Even the sounds bring you to mind. I no longer am displeased by these resemblances; I find them oddly comforting. To see someone you love everywhere you go is a beautiful thing to shoulder.
But of this I am haunted: do you see me too? Or am I alone in my indulgence of another? Have you forgotten me?

I’m smoking the butts of your cigarettes;
The ones you left in the ash tray during our last conversation.

I’m smoking the butts of your cigarettes;
Just to be where your lips have been.

I’m only doing this all because I think that I need it;
It’s as close as I can get to you.