The first time you kissed me it was a surprise, I wasn’t ready.
It was a sneak attack, funny ‘cause they say the girl ‘always knows.’
I think we’re lucky we didn’t chip a tooth.

The unexpected slowed me - ‘ok, that happened,’ I thought.
Because I’d wondered, before - ‘does he like me like THAT?’
Then suddenly you came into sharp focus, your lips, your eyes,
your goofy smile. It changed things, for us - like Jesus’s birth
changed time - there was before kiss (bk) and after kiss (ak).

We somehow kludged our way into love - the old-fashioned way
without navigation software, dating sites, hookup apps or breadcrumbs.
Like our foremothers and fathers or Columbus - we bumbled into a New World.

A roommate shows me this hookup app - the consensus favorite.

“Call me crazy,” I say, “but if we’re reducing *** to something
cheap and cynical, wouldn’t **** be safer and easier?”

She frowns, as if I’ve espoused an unpopular political position
so I make a show of putting “join the app” on my to-do list
- which is like sending it into outer space.

Sleeping with someone you don’t like - or even know, seems impolite, even seedy but there’s a power to it as well - knowing I could if I wanted to - I quash that thought as it rises, like heat.

Besides, factoid: I have an imaginary boyfriend, And although my thoughts are free to roam far and wide, I’m nothing if not faithful.

On Facebook

for leaving a comment on a post about Orangutans. The article was about how they found that primates have an actual language. It's not like I said "duh". Another person said that they were probably talking **** about us. My comment said "**** them"!

Thanks Facebook for helping me realize that i'm not funny. And thanks for giving me a week to think about my actions(or what some lifeless ***** thinks is an action). A facebook ban is in the best interest of anyone who gets banned. Anyone who reported my comment as hate speech, has a lot more to face up to than me...and it's all saved on the master server.

A week of full on, beautiful reality.

Your profile doesn’t have a picture but you have been good conversation
Working retail has reinforced the mindset that people are snowflakes in all shapes and sizes
This doesn’t help me, I literally have no idea what you could look like
Or if you are even a person
What if I’m chatting with a scientifically enhanced hamster
If some Lovecraftian being is mingling with me through the cosmos
I asked for a pic 5 minutes ago and the outlandish ideas above have humored me until you replied
Do I read it and force the universe to give me an answer
Do I delete this whole app and live my life never knowing for certain
What if you say no
Then it must be some tentacled being wishing to unravel my very being
If only they knew that if left to my own devices I’ll do that on my own
I got the pic and now as predicted I unravel myself
Why would you like me
Why would you think I’m cute
How in the world would you find me worthwhile
You have a college hoodie on and it only serves to remind me that I am still in my rut no matter how good things have been going recently
You are the breath of spring and the other shoe at the same time
I guess I’ll keep typing, I’m glad at least the void has a face now

Respectful message.
I'm too nice.

Flirty message.
I'm too aggressive.

Long, descriptive message.
I'm too wordy.

Short, succinct message.
I'm too boring.

I hope you understand this message.

All Apps Un-installed
Hard disks wiped out
Operating System lost
System Shutdown
RAM cleared
BIOS destroyed
Object Id Retained
ROM info Retained

Hardware burnt to Ashes
Or left for Micro-organisms
Scriptures say, Sages re-iterate
Believers believe, others disagree
Object ID may be Reborn
With new OS and Apps
Or there is another possibility
Object ID gets destroyed
And witness Moksha
Free from further rebirth and deaths

Sorry this poem is not on Computers
But I am sure, it's about Humans
Smart Humans, Mortal Humans
Bound to follow the System of
LIFE, DEATH, RE-BIRTH
Until Moksha comes for Rescue

Tonight was a great night.
A warm fuzzy feel good smiles and sunlight
great night.

You wanna know how I can tell?
It's written in the stars and
the way the clouds move, like the statues
we talked about
bright stars and constellations mean
it was a great night.
Or at least a good something.
And we stood like those dark statues for hours.

good luck
good friends
good feelings
great night

You smell like musk and old cigars—
they smell like nothing because they're digital information.
I just downloaded Tinder, you see?
they smell like moonlight reflecting off your smile

Whether you or them,
I won't die alone. On this
great night at least, you're here,
they're there
and all three parties can hold a starlight conversation.