I suppose
I don't write
As others do.

But you see,
My work is from within.
Real
Raw
Riddled with bits and pieces of
Myself.

Don’t plead like Biebs
Timbaland was right
Too late for "sorry"
Can’t erase the blight
Your apologies
Might seem polite
But all your white lies
Have been brought to light
Selfish transgressions
Brought this plight
Upon your own life
Despite the height
Of your own success
Now it seems so trite
As they kick you out
Into the cold, dark night

Mistakes explode
Like dynamite
As your life ignites
Failures burn so bright
Crashing down in fury
Dead meteorite
You feel the pain
Your enemies delight
Nowhere to hide
Your shame in plain sight

Adrenaline surging
Now it’s fight or flight
So just take a sec
Sit down, rewrite
Reset your future
Set yourself upright
Your values and actions
Gotta reunite
Redemption’s hard
No way to expedite
It’s gonna hurt
But hang in tight

I apologize
Baby I’ve been trying, nothing seems to cover up the pain
I’ve been trying, holding on, holding on
Baby I’ve been trying, nothing seems to cover up the pain
I’ve been trying, holding on, holding on
Holding on to your pain forever
I'm just holding on, holding on to your pain

I been holding on to this pain for such a long time, trying to outfight my demons put it to rest, had to get it off my chest ease this dreaded stress, first let me start off by stating I take full responsibility this is an apology, I know sorry can't fix everything but maybe it'll soothe your pain

Sitting here sniffing the pleasant stench of your favorite sweater, reminding me it makes no sense of how I treated you, your love was innocent so raw it's pure, I made you ashamed you got taken for granted caused you so much pain a strain on your heart, it's all my fault failed my part couldn't protect your heart it turned dark, decayed your love it's nonexistent for a new lover you spite men you hate me, sinister you plot vengeance a demon I created leaving you frustrated caused you to miscarriage you want me castrated cause of dying breed, you forgot how to love tormenting your heart to cover up the pain a demon I created attempted sucide your soul can't take it, Seems you survived respawned just to destroy to me trama that I created

I apologize for your pain these words are not confessed in vain, repeated karma my father did the same thing to mama warfare of generational curse trying to break the shackles can't drag this heavy chain no more my strength deteriorating,  emotional abuse I cause in the past is my irresonspility of love I rebuke it painful mistakes I made I apologize I am ashamed in due time I hope this poem ease your pain love is a learned lesson but still can't fix pain

I want you to forgive me for yourself
not for me, can't keep holding on
I want you to love again no suffering

I apologize
Baby I’ve been trying, nothing seems to cover up the pain
I’ve been trying, holding on, holding on
Baby I’ve been trying, nothing seems to cover up the pain
I’ve been trying, holding on, holding on
Holding on to your pain forever
I'm just holding on, holding on to your pain

How could I have been so close
Yet so far away
The gap in the distance is more intense than I'd actually like to say
It feels like almost yesterday, where the smiles or frowns that came around
Never settling in the crest we call a "face"
It wasn't as fake as it was now
The warmth of your smile turned the mood around
Even if it was disappointing I couldn't help but try a bit harder for the sake of being friends
Cause that's what they do, staying true,
yes true
Not saying I've caught them in a lie
It just feels a little blue, on the other side
I wish I could hold your hand, just to adore
This, space that we once had
It's not the same years later and I know things have changed
Again this isn't a plead for help
Just my old thoughts into an expression
Takes it like the old way of written out confessions
If I had to be convicted Id be in for a long sentence
Like the, I broke a promise and left without saying a word,
Sad how we make it seem like it was the another's fault that we're this way...
Though in the end, it was selfish actions... selfish actions...selfish actions...and self-indulgence
That pushed the gap and broke the space apart
Id like to say sorry as a start in the right way
Though I don't think that would mend the nasty tear that's been every slowly gashing
We've been on the rocks thrashing about in a glass cup smashing with fruit juice and *****
I remember the sweet cheers of that kiss and the hard rocks on the bed
I understand it, I do
I lived in the misery of your happiness that shined through
I wanted to use your opening and vent without considering what your feelings meant
That this was a special event, and I wasn't just getting experience but giving it too
Where sweet words never left the heart
Where promises were meant to last
I formally apologize,
I can't take it away for what has happened
But I'll keep moving forward regardless of forgiveness
I don't expect to walk back into a life that I created so many problems for
And I understand completely if these words cannot pierce through like a sword
It's no point that way