nails on your back
my head to the wall
i've written a happy ending after all
wishful thinking
becomes a thing of past
i am nothing without you
a toast with broken glass

turn the page if you will
here i'll be, standing still
whatever we erase
is always replaced
by something better
something real

i give you my life
i ask you to keep it
i gave you my heart
i'll admit it has weakened
but that's due to the fact
my love for you has deepened

hold me forever and beyond
i don't care who we hurt
i'll watch the world shatter to hell
before i let you bleed first
romance isn't it
it's a life; a chaos of our own
light the candle to our goblet of dreams
sit next to me on our throne
being apart i just can't condone

if not with you,
i'd rather die alone

you're the perfect novel;
a story on your own and then
i could write pages and pages about your smile
your voice in itself is the greatest poem;
your mind is the pen

not a fairytale, because those are fake
you are here in the now;
your skin i can taste

wrap me in your forever
your world is my home

for if not with you,
i'd much rather die alone.

Once an addict always an addict
And I'm back in the attic
Blowing dust off picture frames and knickknacks
Stirring up old feelings and panic attacks
These memories so fragile
These demons so quick and agile
None of it ever goes away
Just covered until a cloudy day
When my soul decides to do some housekeeping
But this is something no spring cleaning
Could ever completely sanitize
Until I come to realize
That this is no longer me
Just remnants of what I used to be

you run through my mind like water
cleansing any good left in this world
showers of emotions that cannot be restrained
down upon my heart do they rain
and in seeking shelter from the storm
i find myself in the trap you've created
left with no option but to strip myself down and now my soul is naked
though i stopped answering your calls
i remember how good you felt inside me
soon i am prisonor at war that's been taken
(and you always seem to find me)

what say you? you crazy man of a fool
i've sent you packing straight to hell
(though i've been there a few times too)
it's when the chill in the air becomes too cool
that i feel the need to be abused by you
and the pain in the pleasure is worth the ravishing beating
we say it's love, but what's the true meaning?
when two souls are colliding because they've come out of hiding just to give way to waters receding

you say i'm your revolution
that i am the sun to your earth
i say some lies are worth believing
(yet they always seem to work)
a round of applause to the love
that always makes it hurt
a standing ovation to the taste of your kiss
that always makes it worse
because you will always leave
and i will always turn away
but you will always be back
and i will always vow to stay

what's the meaning any way?
an addict never tells the truth they say
shoot me with your broken promises any day; right in the veins
the high is a euphoria i can't explain
we've everything to lose
we've nothing to gain
i am addicted to your madness
you are addicted to my pain

rebels in a world that isn't ours
we set the standards; there are no bars
there is no sun to set; there are no stars
there is just us

whoever we are

When life gets hard
and I need an escape,
I just go out and
find me a date.

To ease the pain
and run away
I get on my  back
and just lay.

Tall, short, heavy, thin
nothing matters when I'm
escaping what's within.

Too many things going on
in my head,
call me a THOT
but for the night
all I want is you
in my bed.

Or I can be in yours,
but don't call me your girl
just sssshhhh play in curls.

When I moan and shout
its me releasing all the
pain and doubt.
So the last thing I want
is for you to cover my mouth.

Don't muffle me
I do that enough to myself
all I wanna do is hear
the sound of your belt.

When your pants hit the ground
I know its going down.
But don't worry about that,
I'll go first.
Let me **** you like I love you,
let me **** you like I want you,
I'll **** you like I'll love
to never have you leave.

Bets believe its not you I want
but rather the thing
that pulsates and jumps
right between your legs.

Don't come yet
I'm not ready
don't make me beg.

As soon as you bust
then I know it's time
That I must get back
to my reality.

But I rather not be,
I like my sexcapes
they're how I keep my sanity.

I use
to have a solution to
any feeling I had

your love
acohol
blades

and everything's gone

and I sit here
thinking about my addictions

and oh how easy
it could be for me
to slip back
into old me

she's been gone
for almost a year

she's in my mind
yelling at me
saying
"dear god get me the hell out of here"
begging me
to let her be free