I loved you a lot
I still do
But my words to you are cruel
You beg for me to stay
I'll try to ignore you at school
But my eyes can't drift away
I want to keep your heart
I want you to keep mine
This poison is tearing me apart
A gun shot to the spine
I won't leave
I promised forever and always
No more tricks up my sleeve
I'll love you for the rest of my days

There are times when writings is useless.
When the similes go on for too long like when the ocean merges with the sky and your eyes cannot the define the boundary between each crystalline blue and it is almost sublime because there is no end or no beginning and that is what I think of you. Infinite

There are times when art is not enough.
Like those times I cannot make the right mixture of the hue of that lovely tint in your eyes and, of course, not matter how many times I trace you in the canvas those lips like rose petals will never move and say "Me too."

There are times when music is lacking.
How you remind me of a melody each and every single time I see you and despite trying to trap the melody in these useless music sheets nothing comes but a few missing music notes that birds and composers have not and will not fathom.

But if I could write you down in paper,
I'd let the words scramble away once more because the free verse of your world intrigues me further more than finite verses on washed out paper.

If I could paint your essence,
Life would be a monochrome film,no more technicolour, no more blushing cheeks. I like you much more in this everlasting landscape where you can dye the world a million colours and still search forevermore

If I could play you in to melody,
The poor birds would be envious and the world would be a quiet place without composers able to eclipse that lovely song of yours. And yet, I love this cacophonous world in which everyone is deaf to you but I who can discern such a faint, dainty tune.

There are those times, you know?
When I know I'm not good enough but if I could, I still would not.

Do not make homes out of human beings
They will leave you feeling homesick and sad
Not because you deserve to feel that way
But because they can

Do not make homes out of human beings
You will lose yourself trying to find them

Do not make homes out of human beings
Because building homes means comfort
Comfort of which you do not have control over

Do not make homes out of human beings
Because building homes in people means that there is space for emptiness and mistakes

So please darling,

Do not make homes out of human beings
Because it will collapse
Every
Single
Time

I've been awaiting
your texts
Not because I want to respond
But I want to know your mind
Is some how still attached to mine

being separated from you
is suffocating
and i wonder
if you feel the same

I don't know what I'm doing
and I'm not sure if I ever did.
These worries wear me down
and sit heavy on my chest,
but I have no plan for my future
because I'm not sure
if I even want one.

There’s a devil in me trying to raise his face
there’s a god in me trying to put him in his place
a fight to fill the hole in my heart
but the battle is lost before they can start
soul electric, here to stay
pulls me apart need to make them pay
a million volts in a lightning kiss
re-align my core in symmetrical bliss.

I can't face you.
Not because I'm over you
Or because I hate you,
But because I'm afraid
That the next time you see me
You'll realize that I was never
Worth the world
Like you thought I was
When you would've given it all up
To keep my hand to hold.