My mental health is not doing okay.
I’m not doing okay.
But i pretend I’m okay.
I’ll be okay.
Probably.
Hopefully.
Maybe.
I’m fine.
It’s fine.
Everything is fine.

I have kissed boys

Girls

People in between

But lately I have been kissing bottles

Their lips are colder than yours

But slowly I have realized that the pounding headache when I wake is less hurtful than the shattering in my chest

Yet as these toxins rush through my veins

I can't help but miss the tracing of your fingers along my skin

Miss the numbness of the world when you lie with me

But when I wake I remember that a headache is treated with an aspirin

While heartache

Well if you have a cure for Heartache let me know

your name is
forbidden in
my mouth
or in my heart
because when
i think about
you;

i'll cry a little more,
hurt a little stronger
love a little softer
because you no longer
make me feel sober

i'm drunk on the
memory of you

Don’t build me up
To break me down
Don’t make me smile
To make me frown
Don’t me make laugh
To make me cry
Don’t make want to live
To make me want die...

they say that if you drink
enough water you will be healthy
i say that if you shed enough tears
you ll be finally happy.

You were always loving me "despite"
I needed you to love me "because"

Dream...
Reality...
Does this universe exist...
Or is it our reflections...

I am just what you think you see
You are what I learned to perceive
Have we even met?
Or was it a shadow in my head...

Maybe I don't even know you
But then, how do I miss you...

One day you will
not remember my name

The touch of my hand
the rhytm of my heart

One day I disappear
from your life

From everybody's life
Even my own