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 Nov 2019 Gracie Anne
Syomone
What made
us so beautiful
Is that we
were never
likely to happen,
And here we are;
Pretending
to be oblivious
To the obvious
love waves
Bouncing back
and forth
Between
our hearts
This thing
Is a never
ending start...
Where the moments
we are meant to share,
Are carelessly
forced apart.
 Oct 2019 Gracie Anne
Ashari Ty
Hello, Anxiety!
How's Depression going?
Have you met my old friend Insecurity?
I would like to talk more about Self Doubt but

I really have no time to stop by
I have to get moving
Can't stop, won't stop
Rush rush rush

I have a date with Destiny, sweetheart.
My name is Taylor and I have a tooth that tucks behind one of my front teeth.

I say this as my first sentence because when I look at myself in the mirror and smile, that is the first thing I notice.

But a compliment I've heard more times than once, "You have a beautiful smile."

I  wonder how many things in life are like that...

Qualities or characteristics that people agonize over are the very things that others appreciate and admire.
 Oct 2019 Gracie Anne
Belle
I'm desperately searching
For an ounce of permanence
In a world in which
Everything fades to nothingness
 Sep 2019 Gracie Anne
Remi Leroy
“I know what you’re thinking.”

Do you?
You can’t read me like an open book.
You have no idea what I truly think.
What makes you so sure I even see you as a friend like the way you see me?

You see me
as a studious girl, diligently finishing my work
as an intelligent girl, acing the tests in the subjects I’m good at
as a responsible girl, always carrying out my duties with zeal and efficiency
as a kind hearted girl, courteous and honest
You also see me
as a mean girl who gossips about others
as a conceited girl who brags on and on about herself
as a selfish girl who does things only if it is to her benefit
as a coward who is afraid of so many things
as a lazy *** who does nothing in weekends
The list goes on.

Just because you see the good and the bad of me, you think
you know me.
Do you?
Don’t be too quick to answer that question.

You will never know the nights I spend going insane
thinking about myself
thinking about you
thinking about others
You will never know about the times when I breakdown into a useless emotional wreck
with the tiniest action from someone
You will never know about the certain few nights and what I did to myself
and how I cry
on and on, nails digging deep into my palms, on and on, uncontrollably hyperventilating, on and on… even when I don’t want to.
You will never know about the content in my diary
what these words really mean
what my purposes are

You will never know about the way my brain is wired
about the way I see the world
about the way my mind is poisoned, tainted, corrupted, trained to manipulate, functioned to lie.

You don’t know me even if you think you do.

You don’t know about how much I fear myself while I type these words
while I’m thinking about the pain in my heart and how it is therapeutic.

My lips are parched, my throat is dry, my breath is coming out in slow deliberate long breaths.
My mind stays warped, damaged and tainted.
The edges of my eyes hurt from too much rubbing.
My heart is still hurting, as it does every day and night.
My eyes stay shut as I think about how I am going to survive tomorrow.

You ask me why I hate everyone. You ask me why I am so pessimistic. You ask me why I am so irritable. You ask me so many questions and you say
“I know what you’re thinking.”*
Do you
when I don’t even know myself anymore?
14.07.20
Welcome to our society.
Where the teens are depressed,
And the students are stressed..
Where people will hate you,
For what you wear and your weight..
Where there's only *** no hugs,
And there is no candy just drugs..
Where we cut form an escape,
And the parents beat and ****...
Where laws forbid people of  being gay,
And everything is weary and grey...
So I hope you enjoy your visit with society,
Just try not to get depressed and anxiety..........
whats going through my mind at the momment
hope you guys like it
second poem
 Sep 2019 Gracie Anne
CP
Vulnerability is scary
I guess that's why I'm always wary
In the palm of another's hand
I solemnly stand

Vulnerability is scary
Someone I know barely
They could *bury
me
In debris

I'm flesh and bones
Their words could be stones
The way you shake when you're crying
Or when you blink when you're lying
Because inside you know you're dying

When I tell you how I feel
I may begin to heal
This is so unreal-
Yet I still fear that you will squeal
What I tried so hard to conceal

Vulnerability is scary
I would like to say contrary,
I feel like a freed canary
How very wrong
I've made another prison
With bars made of vulnerability

My secrets have become a liability
For I foolishly trust
You will not run
When we are done

Vulnerability is so scary
 Sep 2019 Gracie Anne
yúyīn
Escape
 Sep 2019 Gracie Anne
yúyīn
And for that second,
The blade ripped across the surface,
tearing the flesh apart,
letting the blood run free.
I've forgotten every problem I have and had.
The pain was my escape,
and it will always be..
Sighhh
@.**
 Aug 2019 Gracie Anne
Undone
Knowing
 Aug 2019 Gracie Anne
Undone
I walked to school today

Knowing I cried myself to sleep last night

Knowing no one knew

Knowing that was my power that I owned over everyone else
My father walked me down the aisle,
But my mother held my arm.
He went with me,
But we went not towards the altar,
But towards the door.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And the ***** rang through the church,
Humming through the elaborate crown molding,
Carved by my ancestors.

He went,
Not beside me,
But before me,
And I watched,
As he was illuminated by the bright,
Overbearing,
Texas sun.

My father walked me down the aisle,
But I did not wear white.
My father walked me in silence,
And I shed tears not for a man standing at the altar,
But for the one I would never see again.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And no veil obscured my face.
All eyes were upon me, but not for my pristine beauty,
Instead for my clenched jaw and furrowed brow,
Severe and fierce to distract from my glassy eyes.

My father did not leave me at the end of our walk to sit beside my mother.
She clung to me for support and sobbed breathlessly,
Loudly,
Unavoidably,
And I carried her with one hand,
My sister the other,
And walked towards my future.
A future family,
Not one person more,
But one person less.
I walked,
One final time,
With him.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And I will never forget it.
Hundreds of eyes isolating my family from the crowd,
Slow and muffled sounds drowning in the deafening beat of my heart,
Blurred faces staring,
Black heels clacking against the cobbled path from the church,
The anguished wails of my mother,
The whimpering of my sister,
And the wooden box that glided before us,
Pulling,
A string tied to our patriarch,
The pin key of our family,
Pulled taut and then snipped with the slam of the hearse doors.

My father walked me down the aisle,
Before I had a chance to grow up.
He walked me,
Out of the church,
Away from the altar,
Never to be walked again.
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