yúyīn 3h
~Letter to myself~
I want you to know how sorry I am. I am truly, truly sorry. I want you to know that you don’t deserve to be treated the way I treat you. I should show you how special you are. Treat you with respect, with kindness and with compassion. But I don’t. I take you for granted. I criticise you. I tell you you’re pathetic, and I tell you so many times you believe it. I judge you, harsher than anyone else ever can. I bully you. I tell you you aren’t good enough. I tell you not to try because you will fail. I abuse you. Mentally, emotionally, and even physically sometimes. I’m hurting you. I was meant to be your friend. But I’m despising you. I hate the sound of your voice and the beating in your chest. I wish I could tell you I love you. But I don’t. And I am truly sorry about it.
She can’t tell who will leave
and who will stay.
Instead she chooses
To push them all away.

Being vulnerable
Is her greatest fear.
Her heart is too guarded
To let someone near.

So scared to be loved
Afraid to trust.
If she is broken again
She may crumble to dust.
You broke her heart,
But she still loves you
With all the pieces.
  7d yúyīn
the moment a poet
falls in love with you

is the moment
you live

f o r e v e r
  7d yúyīn
i am locked within a cage
of my own making
my hands and feet are bloody
from trying to climb these walls
made of my own bones and hatred

i am screaming please don't leave
but by the time the words
make their way up to my mouth
from this prison
only the word
escapes my mouth
please don't leave, even when i am so difficult. I truly do not mean it and wish more than anything for you to stay. please stay
  7d yúyīn
i hope one day
if not soon
you see that
her and i
do not have the same
hair color
skin color
eye color

my name is mine
and hers is hers
we are different sizes
we have different voices
my history is more than a few
textbooks you receive throughout high school
where hers is just a chapter

she is easy you see
and me
well i am complicated
i am the destruction left in the wake
of when a hurricane and tsunami meet

please stay
even though i am rough
but know
i am not her
i am me
  7d yúyīn
in college i was asked
if i could compare myself to anything
but a human
what would i be

most of the class
said a tree
the ocean
a flower
the wind
but not me

i am an onion
hardened on the outside
but as you take your finger
and peel
and peel
and peel

you find that
the layers of my life
have left you in tears
or sad

that choice is up to you
Next page