~Letter to myself~
I want you to know how sorry I am. I am truly, truly sorry. I want you to know that you don’t deserve to be treated the way I treat you. I should show you how special you are. Treat you with respect, with kindness and with compassion. But I don’t. I take you for granted. I criticise you. I tell you you’re pathetic, and I tell you so many times you believe it. I judge you, harsher than anyone else ever can. I bully you. I tell you you aren’t good enough. I tell you not to try because you will fail. I abuse you. Mentally, emotionally, and even physically sometimes. I’m hurting you. I was meant to be your friend. But I’m despising you. I hate the sound of your voice and the beating in your chest. I wish I could tell you I love you. But I don’t. And I am truly sorry about it.