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Apr 2017 · 784
Cleo
I wasn't there when you died.
Though its clear now that it was your time
You were 14 and had dementia, half deaf, and half blind.
Not to mention the arthritis.
Still doesn't hurt any less

I still feel your soft black and white fur
The feeling when you blessed us with a kiss
Your chocolate brown eyes

When you were a puppy
I remember you losing your teeth
Except you didn't have a tooth fairy

I remember you climbing onto the widow seat
I still have that picture.
No idea how you even got up there.

One week before Fudge died,
It was a normal friday for me
I went to work, had a great day.
I came home and wondered where you were.
My mom had put you down and taken Fudge to the vet hospital
December 9th, 2016
I didn't realize that morning was the last time I would see you.
F**k. I love you Cleo
Apr 2017 · 758
Fudge
December
2 pm
We drive up to the building
It seems solemn now
We came to see you for the final time

December 15th
2:05 pm
We gather our courage to get out of the car
I open the door
Its heavy

December 15th, 2016
2:10 pm
We're ushered into the room where you are
You try to get up to reassure us
We know you're in pain

Thursday, December 15th, 2016
2:11-2:16
I'm holding you now
I have your favorite stuffed animal

Thursday, December Fifteenth, 2016
At 2:20 pm
The vet tells us to tell him that you are a good boy
"You're the best dog I could have ever had, Fudge. I'll love you forever."

On Thursday, December Fifteenth, Twenty sixteen.
At 2:24 P.M.
You died in my arms.
The happiness and relief you had in your eyes.
You were in so much pain.
I love you. Forever
Fudge was 6 years old, he was going to be 7 years on March 8th of this year. He died December 15th of Peritonitis. Fudge was in training to be my service dog and help me out when that wire was in his intestines, he was the one who really needed help, but he didn't want me to worry. He was in pain for months and didn't try to tell us. He was the best dog I could have ever had. I love him.
Within the atmosphere there is a limit,
How high can you fly?
No amount of Magick can keep us apart.

A parting of ways,
Remembering our final days,
I'll find my way back to you.

I know you need to heal,
Discover your true self,
Then return back to me.

By my words of binding,
I promise this to you,
Heed my words,
They are true,
I'll find my way back to you.

We'll be different then,
Hopefully on a plane of Zen,
To you I Promise,
We'll meet each other then.

I can't say it will be easy.
But with time,
It wont be hard.

Heal,
Then come back to me,
A brand new you,
You will be.

I will wait,
However long it may be,
But we will be forever,

I promise our paths will meet again,
They say its a small world,
But we carry each other's heart,
How inevitable it will be.

Heed this promise,
A Binding by me,
We will be in each other's arms soon enough,
Forever we will be.
ugh, why did I write this? He was abusive.
May 2016 · 1.1k
Definition
Unfinished- Not completed
Something I wish I had not procrastinated
Procrastination- This project
Sorry, Something pushed off to be finished later
Distraction- Something that takes yo-
Oh wait, is that? No, nevermind.
there was more, just, the artist is the most critical of their work than any other
May 2016 · 2.3k
I'm Sorry I'm so Difficult
I'm sorry I'm so difficult,
I Don't mean to be...
Its just how I am,

I'm sorry I'm so difficult,
It's ok,
I hate it too,

I'm sorry I'm so difficult,
With everything I do
May 2016 · 397
Ode to Love
My love
An old friend
Our dance to the tune of
The happiness of year's end

Silvery pale hair
Haunting grin
Dark stare
Glowing ethereal skin

My gorgeous counterpart
You arrive, nocturnal
You stop the beating of my heart
Your stare is eternal

Gathered in your breath
Whisper to the sweet sounds of Death.
Shouldn't it be that a woman is death, a woman called you to life, its fair she should call you home into death's *****.
I love myself, but, I hate myself.
I am as beautiful as an abandoned building.
I am where the forgotten things lie.

I love myself but I hate myself.
I am the eternity that is the universe.
The thoughts inside will not let me die.

I love myself but I hate myself
My brain holds an entire universe
That I use to escape this one.

I love myself but I hate myself,
I had a universe in my hands.
I put mine away for a little while but I couldn't hold onto you.

I hate myself.
My universe that I had created as my salvation wanes.
Why I wish I knew...

The tears come to my eyes but they just won't fall...
But maybe they weren't made for you
Nov 2014 · 551
Should I Smile?
Somewhere I can write my thoughts,
Here is good I guess,
I talked to my boyfriend today,
Only over Skype though,

He was happy in the beginning of the call,
I was too,
But something changed,
It made Happy untrue,

Throughout the call,
We talked about various things,
Some of those things were quite amorous,
Which made him quite happy,

It was a joke that he had made,
A joke that made me unwell,
It was about a four year old kid,
Who had unknowingly sold their soul to Hell,

I had a father,
He was reminiscent of the Devil,
Who had divorced my mum,
And had cheated on her as well,

From my Four year old self,
To when I was twelve,
I had been groomed you see,

It was at the age of twelve,
When my life went from bad to worse,
Even after my grandfather went away in a hearse,

I had gotten a burn from the sun,
I had a lot of fun,
It was my school's field day you see,
I had forgotten my sunscreen,
I didn't care and I was happy,
All until I went to go stay with my daddy,

He had offered to put aloe on my back,
But it had gone further than that,
He had threatened me,
I knew he would hurt me if I didn't,

I had complied all those years you see,
From four to twelve,
And three weeks after my back had healed from the burn,
The pain never actually went away,

You can numb it,
And that's what I've done,
I've even tried to make myself gone,

But now you see,
Even the thought of an innocent four year old,
It can trigger the deepest of thoughts,
And pull you into a depressed stupor,

So when people tell me,
I have the world in front of me,
And that I should smile,
Should I?
we aren't dating anymore... i guess my depression was too much for him.....
Oct 2014 · 395
Love Is
Love is when you run to someone that you trust when you're in pieces and they put you back together again.
The one you confide in,
The one you trust with your life.
Not the one you lust for,
Nor the one you cry over.
They are there to wipe away your tears,
To hold you with all your fears.
They create butterflies in the pit of your stomach,
They know how to nurture them to life and create swarms of them.
They know your fears,
Your likes,
Your dislikes.
They know when you're mad or sad.
They know how to talk you down from the ledge.
They don't run in fear when you say something they don't like.
They form to you.
They take care of you in your worst.
Love is when you can't get enough of them.
Not just lust,
But their eyes,
Lips,
Their face.
You want to know every little detail so you can imagine yourself next to them when they are gone.
Love is when you both cuddle together at night and have sore throats from talking all night.
You want to hold their hand while walking alongside them.
You restrain yourself from screaming their name from the rooftops.
Love is when you can both be weird in public and not have a care in the world about who is watching.
Love is when you have no regrets with that person and everything seems to fall apart without them.
Oct 2014 · 1.3k
Pagan Rite
We must rise
To the occasion
While Angels are weak
And Daemons are strong

We are the Pagans
Don't be fooled
By the Christians
Standing tall

They call us evil
But don't believe
Because they have a grudge
Against the Magicks

Pagans are kind
We really are
But don't be fooled
By the Angel's Scar

We rise
To this occasion
To take back
What is really ours

The Pain we spent
Over the Grimoir deep
To seek the spell
To sing and speak

Our cauldron bubbles
But don't get confused
With those stereotypes

We are nice
We are kind
We worship the sky
With the earth,
The seas,
And the fire

We love
We laugh
We care
We die

We live like you do
Only we believe
In Mother Earth
And take care of her
Just the same

You must do the same
Only different all the ways

Why spread lies
And then you hide
To fear something you not know

Why think
That we are evil
Because you were told

Take your time learning
What you do not know
So you can say evil

But you will learn
We have nothing to hide
We do not take side
We love our god and goddess

We will teach you
In our ways
Then you can say
Who is wrong
Oct 2014 · 488
Fallen Angel
Bound into my flesh,

Bound and no way out,

In my flesh,

My soul stays,

Bound to an eternal Darkness,

That no one can save me from,

I open myself up,

To the Light,

I numbed myself more,

So much I can't feel Pain anymore,

In my core,

My mind,

Has lost thoughts,

My soul,

Has gone elsewhere,

Traveling the world,

I rise from the deep,

And take your soul,

Filling me with Darkness,

I open my eyes,

All there is is black,

Nothingness,

I steal your eyes,

My hair cascades,

Like the most beautiful,

****** waterfall,

Down my back,

I walk through the crowd,

My gothic clothing,

Matching other people,

I dance to the music,

Matching the beat,

Fallen Angel,

My soul flows back into me,

I'm alive once more,

My eyes return,

And I finally see,

My wings have grown,

I fly above the crowd,

My black feathered wings,

Taking me higher,

I am the unbroken fighter.
Oct 2014 · 423
Never Give In
Never give yourself up,

Or let yourself down,

Can't let yourself down,

Don't let yourself go,

We'll be around,

When we are not,

Just learn,

Make the most of today,

I will die without fear,

And with it,

Death of Darkness inside,

Fear is,

With my greatest respect,

A weapon,

A weapon of Mass Destruction,

One to control itheres,

But not itself,

One that Creates,

And Destroys,

We must not give in,

For if we do,

It will lead to our downfall,

Don't let people,

Tell you who you are,

Instead of marching to a different beat,

Dance,

Dance to the beat of a different drum,

It beats through your heart,

Pumping your blood,

Keeping you alive,

Flowing through your veins
Oct 2014 · 2.6k
Broken
Lying,

Dead,

Broken,

In the Darkness,



I cannot cry,

I always Fear,

Wretched,

Cursed,

Alive but not living,



Masked,

The fear,

The pain,

The sorrow,  



I don't belong here,

Not like this,

Within my pain,

I try to hide,



I am dead,

I am broken,

All in Darkness,

I can't hide,



The Darkness,

Hides most,

But reveals,

Just the same
Oct 2014 · 1.9k
Lies
The Lies of yesterday's past,

Suffer in the Victim's Sanity,

Cover up,

Smiles,

Rumors,

Lies,

Spread through the Castle of Light,

Turning it into Darkness,

You hide,

Inside,

But I know,

I know who you are,

What you are,

I don't care what people say,

I want you to be mine,

I need you to be mine,

But everything is a lie,

I am full of truth,

Covered in a blanket of lies,

Walls keep me in,

I can't get to you,

You can't get to me,

I am broken,

Flawed,

Disgraced,

I cannot move,

Forbidden to see,

A burning smell in my nose,

Bitter taste in my mouth,

Hands and legs bound,

Gag in my mouth,

Dipped in chlorophorm,

Over my mouth,

I feel myself fading,

Losing myself,

I then feel something,

Stabbed into my chest,

Then taken out,

Blood flows,

I start to cry,

Pain is flowing,

Through the blood,

I fade away,

And I slump over,

Dead
This was from a dream that I had.
Oct 2014 · 603
I Am
I am not what you think,

I am fear,

I am darkness,

I am scared,



I am the one people talking about,

The one who cries herself to sleep at night,

The one who cuts to release her pain,

The one who wants to end it all,



End her Pain,

Her Fear,

Her Darkness,



But in reality,

All she wants is to be someone else,

SomeTHING else,

Other than herself,



Whenever she tries to be different,

She gets thrown back,

Unaccepted from the world,



Become something more,

Something inhuman,

Something people will respect,

Something I will understand.
****
You

****
This

I hate
This ****

This is
******* stupid

Why am
I here?
Oct 2014 · 727
We Are Killers
Release the Daemon within,

Let those who are in failure of others,

prevail and ****,

We will not bow to arrogance and stupidity,

We are not what we say we are,

We are to be respected,

Not put down,

We are not to be blamed,

You are our failures,

You can't throw us away and lie to others,

We will **** through the ignorance,

You will not be able to hide,

Those who have been enlightened and believe,

Fear not,

We will spare you,

For you don't believe in their *******,

We will **** them all,

****** them,

Drain them of their blood,

Leave no trace of them,

We are the killers,

Of the ignorant,

Of the people who,

Cannot comprehend the truth,

Of what truly happened
Oct 2014 · 1.7k
Being Pagan
I light

The candles



Glowing bright

In the night



I get up

And dance

With beautiful plight



Nothing to worry

Nothing to fear



Being Pagan

Is wonderful



Full of joy

Full of wonder



It is perfect

Every year



With the snows

Through the rain



In the flowers

On the trees



In Mother Earth

We are free



We don’t need to flee

From harm to our family tree
Oct 2014 · 544
Let Them Die
Let the Water fill your lungs,

As it drains from your eyes.

Let the Air leave your blood,

As your Life seeps away.

Let the Fire melt your skin,

As it burns your bones.

Let the Earth dissolve your skin,

As it leaves no trace of you.

Let your Spirit wander,

As to never to be found.
Oct 2014 · 612
Unchained
I am Unchained,

Unhooked, Unraveled,

I am free,

Free what I want to be,

Free as bird,

But though i am not heard,

Not seen nor felt,

Only felt through pain,

I make people forget,

I was ever here,

I never remember,

If I was human,

I believe I once was,
I believe I had a soul,
I believe I had a heart
Oct 2014 · 7.0k
Doors
As we open up our doors,

Light shines across the floors,

Opening our minds,

Not turning our hinds,



No need to pick a side,

We don't have to hide,

Closeted minds,

Hates what fear finds,



Listen to us,

Without any fuss,

You will learn,

For what you yearn,

Is not behind a closed door,



See with your own eyes,

She does not sigh,

Nor run and hide,

She doesn't pick a side,



We yearn to be free,

Not held in some prison,

To be tortured,

To die unknown,



So be free,

In this Sea,

Free of Greed,

To plant the seed,



Grow the trees,

That frees,

Our souls that hide,

From you, inside.
Oct 2014 · 338
I am She
She forced a smile,

Maybe he'll notice,

She whispers to herself,

Its better than nothing,



Here she screams,

Lost within her dreams,

Her fantasy is her lie,

It makes them want to cry,



She's losing touch with reality,

Stuck in her fantasy,

Lost faith in her humanity,

Giving in to gravity,



All she wants is to be free,

She needs to break away,

From all of the Daemons they slay,

In this unstable world,



Of course the design,

Of what goes on in her mind,

And the mask of disguise,

Gives her the right to hide.
Oct 2014 · 215
Why?
She looks at all the stuff I've done wrong,

Instead of all the stuff I'm trying to do,

Everything I say comes out wrong,

When its perfect in my head,

My mom sits there and yells at me, "Where did I go wrong?"

And most of the times I wish I ended up dead.
Oct 2014 · 264
Wytches Dance
Wytches dance,
Across the moon,
Starlight guiding their path,

Wytches dance,
Creating storms along the way,
Shadowing the fire in their hearts,

Wytches dance,
Children of the light,
Given the gift of sight,

Wytches dance,
Guided by the trees,
Animals watch instead of flee,

Wytches dance,
Many others join with me,
Children of shadows and light,
Come with me and we'll take flight

— The End —