It almost wasen't reality when it happened.
It was like those Hollywood movies when everything happens exactly how you want it.
When i met her i knew then that anything pure i had left in me she could take and keep.
Most of the world was a reflection of itself but she walked by those mirrors without a reflection.
She changed the way the world spin's and what it means to me and how things were.
A world where no song,art, or poem can describe truly who a person is.
The real truth is behind the little time you can spend with them and realize that a cruel world deserves such a beautiful kind spirit to make up for the all the lost and misunderstood people it contains.
Then your back to the beginning with a broken heart. Left behind by the spirit you once knew and loved, But don't worry they say "All good things must come to an end".
So let your heartache for this brave new world until the time comes its your turn for your spirit to be free.

I felt him between my thighs and my heart sang songs my mind didn't even know it knew.
Warm and honeyed thoughts fill me until I am full and I am ready to concede defeat and open myself for his occupation.

But doesn't it always?
The body delights in new and welcome sensations and the head creates them.
I could easily dismiss it all as a ballet of chemical reactions and well placed hands, profoundly meaning

"Nothing".

Because everyone knows when the heat dies down, and the temperature drops, when the passion has waned like the moon, and the tide falls, only the bare bones of you are left and there are only calcium pillars to protect the flame.

Because everyone who has loved, even as a passing thought, has been left in the wake of warring bodies to observe the aftermath.
Was the tenderness making way for lust?
Did every kiss have a drop of hard truth imbued that I missed?
Were his hands caressing shallow intentions into my sensitive skin?
Did I miss the message?
Or were my eyes too open in awe, that they had closed on the casual way his hands and lips met my own?

"And what had all this been for?" Is the question that dances on the outskirts of my mind, while the meeting of my thighs still burned, and my heart had descended into free fall.

Satisfaction? Fear? Gratification? Doubt?

Love?

The worst feeling, of course, not being betrayal, confusion, shame, or loss, but plainly, uncertainty.

Nothing hurts the heart worse than not knowing.

We sat in your car that night
Til three in the morning
And I remember how soft your
Hair between my fingers was
And how your head in my lap
Felt so perfect as we gazed at the stars.

We spoke softly even though
No one was around to hear.
Your voice is always comforting.
And it's funny in a sad sort of way
How I know you don't want me
As badly as I want you

Please tell me,what is this wonderful thing they call love?
How does this feel like?
It is so distant the simple thought of it has vanished.
Tell me,do you see the fondness in their eyes when they look at you?
Do you fall in love with their smile and know that its true love?
Oh,please tell me,I'm just a broken toy with an idea of what love is.
-m.f.g.

The ice it clinks
the straw it stirs
you're making drinks
that won't drown her

She's up all night
you put her to bed
but she puts up a fight
falls asleep with the drink in her hand

Sneak out for a smoke
she's fast asleep anyway
when I came back, she awoke
baby why'd you go away?

But shh you're there now
she's already passed out again
with her little body curled around
yours, she's asleep with a grin.


*s.mndi