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Contoured Jun 2019
I hope to never grow old.
Of course not in a literal sense,
That's inclusive in the natural progression of time.
No, I mean in every other sense.
Passion.
That's what I fear to lose.
I fear to forget.
I struggle, conceptually, with its disengagement.
How can such an emotion wither?

The nights when I lay by your side,
Only to glance into the limitless bounds of your eyes.
That smile, oh that smile.
To not witness that smile would be a tragedy.
The feeling that I provoke that smile,
Engulfs me in affection,
And I fall more in love with you than any can believe to be possible.

Too see the sunrise,
And stand motionless, awestruck.
Its vibrant colors,
Grazing the memories of childhood wonder.
Reliving moments,
Once believed to be lost.
Holding on to a moment mercilessly,
Attempting to extend it to many,
To never wander from it.

To pursue limitless enjoyment,
Never forcing a smile because you don't have to.
To laugh at everything,
With everyone.
The recognition of simple pleasures,
All compiled in a scrapbook of memories.
One to be created at a later time,
Because you're consumed in remembering now.

But eventually,
You'll lose the memories you wish to document.
Because the sand of time slipped through your unforgiving hands,
And you forgot
The once vibrant skies,
Will fade to dull variations of the same tone.
As nature must be re-painted from time to time,
Which you forgot.
The laughs,
They'll fade to echos of your own,
With no one left to reciprocate such an intense expression of joy,
Because you forgot.

Unforgiving forget will consume that which you should've never forgotten.
Because as time grows old,
The body does too.
And as the past begins to wither,
The brain disengages.

As time progresses,
Passion does not have to be lost.
You do not have to forget.
The things forgotten are what you wish to forget.
Contoured Apr 2019
And in the smallest matter of time,
My hair went numb.
My eyes no longer heard the crude respiratory patterns of the fellow cynic.
My fingers saw the over-appreciated path away from the now.
The mind I'd so delicately restrained surcharged your hurtful chatter for the worthlessness it possessed.
For I had found not what I thought to be the whole of myself,
But what actually was.
Among the wilted carnations,
The shrunken produce,
The wasted inquisition,
All the places in which you dwell,
I will no longer.
Contoured Apr 2019
I realize I'm not something to everyone but it hurts not to be everything to someone.
Contoured Dec 2018
I want to be wanted, not used.
But I won't be and that's all I'll ever be.
  Nov 2018 Contoured
MawaLin
And when you left
I overwatered all your flowers
  Oct 2018 Contoured
Ariana Bagley
I love him
I tell myself
I know that
We will be together forever
I don’t believe that
We could be separated
My thoughts tell me that
He’s the love of my life
Sometimes my heart lies and says
I could live an eternity
Without him
Like my friends say
“We’re perfect for each other”
And you can’t tell me
He’s not the one.

Now read from bottom to top.
Contoured Oct 2018
"When was the last time you felt happy?"
Well that's an unfairly complex question.
You see, happiness comes in two phases:
There's certain happiness and there's deceptive happiness.
I only know one, and that's where the problem lies.
Deceptive happiness is when you try with your utmost ability to smile, to laugh, to be happy because you genuinely want to, but the issue?
You've forgotten how.
You're forging complex scenarios, creating ideal circumstances, but you still feel sad.
So you smile, you laugh anyways because people do not understand what it feels like to never feel that way.
Do not tell me I'm depressed.
I'm lonely and heartbroken, and that is far worse.
So, do you see why I cannot answer that?
I can't because I haven't felt that way in a long time.
But you don't understand, you can't understand.
"I'm happy now."
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