& There she was
the subtle reflection without a mirror
quiet
kept
reserved
strong
my soul sister
with words to offer me
that once choked my esteem
silencing the bull horn full of my insecurities
you are enough
you always have been
you always will be
& the second I tried to question the truth
it spilled out and over me like rushing water
cleansing me of the layers
piled up
from years of laying underneath potential
I can breathe here
above expectations
amongst my faith
I know that life is worth living here
I know because I've felt the air thin
Like rustling paper in a silent classroom
I've been too embarrassed to be seen
too unsure to be viewed
but you
my sister
you ignited the fight in me
stretched my smile  
like turtlenecks over the heads of school age children
more protection then fashion statement
I remember now
That my words pulled the same tears
from my face
from the eyes of strangers
trying not to be seen
in crowds across the world
sitting
while I stood on stage
& stripped myself of all the ill feelings
all the dark nights
and bright moments
short lived
I will never forget why I chose love
why I can't settle for less
than
more
then
a reason to live
I don't know you
yet I'm familiar with me
I, you, we... &
S.H.E

You're probably reading this from the same place I'm writing it
behind a desk
outside the box
trapped in a corporation
free in my thoughts

You're probably reading this for the same reason I'm writing it
because words matter
because it doesn't matter
the way everything matters

You're probably sick of reading
probably
yet we are hardly anything more than what can be proven
we're probably
the invention before probability

The loving  likelihoods of life
like crawling before walking
like falling when learning to walk
like walking into runs

The statistics of confusion
divided for the mystical equation
of adding all things make believe
subtracting all things real
and solving you for yourself

You've got to be a collection of seasons
Nothing else falls
Springs
or shines like summer

You have been cold
Not like winter
Cold like media reported deaths
without justice, just destruction

I have hung my head low for you
Like October branches
Given you the pleasure of seeing me fall
Like leaves

Where is the water hole
My tears won’t help Mays flowers grow
Their pedals will wilt
Under the pressure of my confident incapability

Mistake not my expression for hate
You have given me the gift of words
Everyday this month
Tomorrow I will give them back to you silently

It isn't wise to keep things that can't be kept
No one bottles the sun
or wraps the wind
or expects flowers to live after being plucked from the ground

You have made me press pen to paper
Keys to keyboard
To tell the story
Not of how we met but how we prolonged a very necessary  goodbye

How long does a baby wait
Until the Mothers water breaks
To pass thru the gates... of time

How quickly things change
the moment we have names
victims of the game... of time

Our bodies race our minds
Only one will truly find
Peace in the design... of time

There is never enough
yet always too much
the battle of it verses us
TIME

Do you know what its like
to have all these things
beauty
life
bursting at the seems
creativity is its mask
you hide it well
but soon enough the water rises
and the tide will swell
it will all spill over
out an onto them
people watching
family
friends
let it cover them like blankets as they sit
to be inspired by the giving in your gift

Like air to lungs
Like love to lovers
Like life to death
Till death do us part
Till God makes us see
In him we all need
One another
One after the other
Brotha & Brother
Sister 2 Sista
Like water to a well
Lets not wait until it runs dry
Eyes wont dry
Until another color cries
With us, not for us
There is only one race
the hueman race
translation
man of color
many colors of men
Color coated pain
Assorted flavors of oppression
All leave a bitter taste
In the mouth of a wordsmith
these words hit like bricks
against walls
in glass houses
with paper doll people
the revolution is being televised
because revolution cannot be heard
without being seen
focus your lense
See yourself

You should have told me this was coming
Not that I could have prepared but at least I would have been foolishly aware
You should have whispered while I loved you that you would leave me
That I'd lose so much of myself in you that in the end I'd need me
Like these shallow breaths I take
That make my Earth quake
Breaking fast at the sight of the Sun & the truth
It rises and falls and all I think of is you
I was a little bit naive by the time it was over
Was hoping to find the fourth leaf of my crazy clover
Before it took me over
I wish I could fight this feeling inside
This desire to need you to want to say goodbye