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Nobody Nov 2024
DISCLAIMER: in this poem, i do not intend to harm or offend any religious folks!

i was raised atheist
so i never believed in god
once
when i was in kindergarten
a kid asked me
do you believe in god?
he asked everyone.
i said no
i was the only one
and he hurt me
he punched me
pinched me
kicked me
and called me a sinner

i keep getting hate
for how i was raised
in the 5th grade
i tried to start believing
but i couldn't
i respect others views
but i don't share them
and i don't think i ever will
i know a little about discrimination,
as a trans
queer
mentally ill
annoying kid
but i think others know more

religion is a silly little thing
for some people
it's their whole personality
because they love it
and for others
it is a weight on their chest and leaves them with trauma

i respect your beliefs as long as you don't force them onto me
Nobody Dec 2024
running a mile
running out of ideas for poetry
running my mouth
running out of time
running out of excuses
running out of hope
running out of sanity
well. i got the writers block
yet again
sad
Nobody Nov 2024
sad
sad
sad
sad
sad
sad

why do i feel

sad
sad
sad
sad
sad

i always feel

sad
sad
sad
sad
sad

you never like me when i'm

sad
sad
sad
sad
sad

hope is lost when i'm

sad
sad
sad
sad
sad

i don't want to be

sad
sad
sad
sad
sad

anymore
Nobody Nov 2024
School
Is a paradise
Where im away from my family
School
Is a prison
Where they teach us useless info
School
Is an escape
Where we can be alone
School
Is a show and tell
Where you are displayed for everyone to see
School
Is a place of mixed emotions
Where there is chaos
Peace
Hate
Love
Bullying
Friendship

.. I dont know how i feel about school
Nobody Nov 2024
School musical
Pretending to be someone im not
School musical
Its all an act
School musical
She's not someone to trust
School musical
She broke the pact

School musical
I sing for entertainment
School musical
Everyone keep your eyes on me
School musical
Ill dance and speak
School musical
There's too much to see
sh
Nobody Dec 2024
sh
it keeps happening
i have no idea why
i look up at the clock
time is ticking by

i have been clean for 23 seconds.
****
that's... that's not a lot.
that's like a whole *** body slam.

i look in the mirror
and try to find a way to hide
the scars and fresh cuts
to keep them out of sight

i don't want them to see
i know they'll just judge me
just like everyone else
leave me alone, please

i don't want to be like this anymore
She
Nobody Nov 2024
She
My parents say theyre supportive
Call me he when im aroumd
But the second you think i cant hear
The second i leave the room
They say.
"SHE'S being weird today."
"I think SHE'S faking it."
"SHE isnt a boy."
"It's just a phase. SHE'LL grow out of it."
They go out of their way to call me she
Not he
Maybe
Just maybe
They might hate me
Nobody Nov 2024
She's tired of a man saying her idea and getting praise when she got ignored
She's tired of being underestimated
She's tired of toxic masculinity from the people she used to trust
She's tired of loving and getting nothing back
She's tired of people using her
She's tired of giving thousands of second chances, without getting any change
She's tired of being mistreated
She's tired of being tired
She's tired
She's tired
She's tired
But she doesnt deserve to be
Nobody Nov 2024
She told you you are ugly?
Sigh and roll your eyes.
She talked about you behind your back?
Sigh and roll your eyes.
She is being dramatic?
Sigh and roll your eyes.
She told you you are worthless?
Sigh and roll your eyes.
She didnt say goodnight?
Sigh and roll your eyes.
Nobody likes you?
Sigh and roll your eyes.
Anything happens?
Sigh.
And.
Roll.
Your.
Eyes.
Nobody Nov 2024
the funny thing about screaming
is that you can do it silently
you can cry for help
just by making eye contact in a certain way
not everybody will notice
but the people
screaming
crying
and clawing at the asylum walls
just like you
will understand
and feel
your pain
i know i do.
Nobody Nov 2024
Skipping school
Avoid the reminders
Say i feel sick
Say i feel tired
Friends worried
Keep missing
Skipping
Avoiding
Ignoring school.
Avoid these people
At all costs
A list of a sidewalk
To skip down on
When I want to feel pain
Because thats all you brought to me
Skipping school...
Avoid the reminders...
Say i feel sick...
Say i feel tired...
Nobody Dec 2024
i want to sleep
because it's the closest i can be
to being dead
without leaving
all of my friends
alone.
but i can't sleep
scary thoughts
keeping me awake
telling me
i'm being watched.
morning
*****.
eye bags
the size of oranges
fingers
sore and slow at typing
eyelids
heavy
like boulders
legs
weak
and useless
but here i am
at school
needing sleep
and dreading the next day
knowing full well
it will be the same as today.
slept for <2 hours last night :')
Nobody Dec 2024
i have to be smaller
i am too big
these people
their words keep repeating in my head
hahaha, she's so light!
ugh, why are you eating so much?
do you know how lucky you are to be light?

i
have
to
be
smaller
Nobody Nov 2024
Sometimes I wish I could have chosen to be someone else
To be someone that people understand
To be someone that people like

But I now know that The people who don't understand me
The people that don't like me
Don't deserve my love.
They don't deserve my attention.

By the time I acknowledge this and leave, they come crawling back.
Funny that they didn't need me before.

People who take your love and don't give any back, they simply don't deserve it.
They are not worth your time.
They don't deserve you.
Remember that.
Nobody Dec 2024
Okay,
But why do we exist?
What is the purpose of this game?
Are we being controlled
By some invisible being?
Like strings on a marionette?
Or are we all alone in this universe
Words lost in the wind?
What if we aren't even real
And this is all just a dream?
What if this whole life
We all built
Friends,
Family,
Home,
(Poetry accounts),
Is just fake
A little thing
That we made up
And one day,
We will just wake up?
And not know what to do?
We lived the while thing
And now we have to start over?

I stand up.
I was there for a long time
This fake world

What if I was right?
2 am thoughts ゜゜(´O`)°゜
Nobody Nov 2024
sometimes i wonder
if you even cared about me
i wonder if you there's anything about me you know
i wonder if you can see

sometimes i wonder
what goes on in your brain
maybe "i'll use him for a joke"
or maybe "i'll make him go through pain".

sometimes i wonder
if inside me, there's something wrong
if inside everyone who knows me
there's something about hate... a song

a song
a melody
saying something's wrong
something's wrong with me
i can't see
you treated me like ****
but i wanted to be your friend?

why
why did i want to be your friend
you were awful to me
was it my fault?
haha toxic friends are awful
Nobody Nov 2024
Hi, sorry this isn't exactly a poem. I'm sorry that I've been dumping all of my ****** poetry and emotions on you, but poetry is my outlet for emotions. With trump winning the elections, I've been left stressed, sad and downright scared. Sorry.
Nobody Dec 2024
i am
f a l l i n g
through
s p a c e
i don't
t r u s t
you enough to
t e l l  y o u
any of my
p r o b l e m s
well,
s o r r y
i hope you understand
Nobody Nov 2024
Icy stares open
Eyes that have been touched by pain
Yet freeze ones left warm~
Toxic friends **** 😅
Nobody Nov 2024
stop it
i want you to stop
you are treating me like ****
you need to stop
stop it
stop it
stop it

so many times i said that to you.
but every. single. *******. time.
you ignored.

STOP IT.
Nobody Dec 2024
"sei molto strano."
beh, grazie
Lo prendo come un complimento
io sono strano.

english:

"you are very strange."
well, thank you.
i take that as a compliment.
i am strange.
Nobody Nov 2024
Last years thanksgiving
Was very different than this one
Heres how it went last year

I ate
Without a second thought
I ate so much food
I talked with
my grandparents
No arguements to be had
And then
I went to bed
After 5 minutes
of shutting my eyes

Here's how It went this year

I ate
Two pieces of pasta
I got as drunk as one could
Off of carbonated apple juice
I flipped my grandparents off
After calling me miss
She
Her
deadname
And a transphobic slur
We got into an arguement
Mostly about trump
And then I went downstairs
To draw vent art
Text my friends
And write poetry
All while drowning in a panic attack
And feeling like nothing is real

Isn't it strange
how fast things can change
In just a year?
Nobody Jan 14
there was a boy
who was nothing but ink
he would speak
and words would

f
            a
l
            l

out from his mouth
words that nobody wanted to hear
because he said too much
people don't want to know him
anymore
Nobody Nov 2024
I miss the good old days
Where we would go to the mall
Read books
Write poetry
And laugh

I miss the good old days
Where we would sleep over at each others houses
Talking about boys
And girls
And music

I miss the good old days
Where we would fight
But the next day
We would hug and make up

I miss the good old days
Where we would watch sad movies
And cry our hearts out
While hugging each other

I miss the good old days
Where we could call each other
Best friends
But i guess
Friends grow apart
I wish we didnt
Because I miss the good old days
And I hope you do too...
Growing apart...
Nobody Nov 2024
ignore the hunger
keep the lion tame
you have joined
the hunger games

**** in your stomach
cover it up
with an oversized hoodie
this *****.

ignore the hunger
ignore the hunger
they'll start hurting you again
if you eat
if you eat
you'll go through the same pain
i want a new brain

ignore the hunger.
survive longer
lose weight
never take

welcome
to the hunger games
Nobody Dec 2024
i don't understand
i just don't understand
why every single time
i cover it with a sleeve or cargo pants
and tell myself
"that was the last time, i'm going to stop doing this."
but its happened so many times
i know it's a lie
Nobody Nov 2024
The showers after
Always hit different
The skin and cuts sting
Lose my soul
While blood falls down the drain
The next 15 minutes always hit different...
Red liquid flowing and gushing out of my cuts
Cuts

        Cut

                  Cu
                        
                                C

It almost stings
As much as your words
Soap
Wash my mouth with soap
Said too much
Told you too much
Said everything wrong
I can't do anything right
Rub salt to my wounds
Please
Nobody Dec 2024
My stomach rumbles
Yet I simply can't eat
People stare
Stop watching
Eyes are everywhere
I cut my wrists
I swallow pills
I slice my throat
I wrap rope around my neck
I've escaped death
So many times
But unlike other people
That makes me ashamed
Whenever im on a Rollercoaster
I want to jump off.
Whenever I see a rope
I want to hang off of it
Whenever I take my meds
I want to take them all
But for some ******* reason
It never works
Why am I even here?
I have no reason to live
I have nothing to live for
I am useless
What do I even bring to this world?
I'm sorry to the little people that will miss me.
Even they will probably get over it.
But I survived
I survived
I survived
I'm alive
I'm alive
I'm alive
I don't want to be.
Nobody Dec 2024
there once was a tailor
who lived in a place unknown
his place was small
but i guess, it was home

he sewed clothes
for people far and wide
with nothing but a thin needle
and fabric by his side.

his job wasn't easy
he worked and worked all day
and the money it made?
well, it barely paid.

but he loved what he did,
with his stitches and thread,
so every night he would lay down
and dream happily in his bed

one day
he got a strange request
he had to make a special robe-
a golden dress.

he tried to explain
this was more than he could do
that this is impossible
but she didn't believe him- so now, he's blue

he tried and tried
but it couldn't be done.
she wanted hundreds of stitches
but he could only do one.

he felt so awful
judging many times over three
so he hung himself
on a branch of the olive tree

the woman was mad
at the tailor
she called him lazy
called him as useless as a sailor

so in the end
nobody won
she didn't get her dress
and the tailor killed himself
because that task simply couldn't be done.

and now,
the olives that come from the tree
remind everyone of him-
and what couldn't be.
idk this is what happens when i have too much free time ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Nobody Nov 2024
the thing about self harm
is that a lot of the time
it isn't a choice
because it's an addiction
a habit
a coping strategy
so next time you see someone
with cuts on their arms
take it from someone who was (and still am) bullied.
ask them if they are okay
don't judge like the others did
be their friend
and help them
because
as an addict myself
i can confirm
we need help
but we don't want it
we want to get better
but we don't
and i don't speak for everyone
but this is how i see it
it's not always a choice
not a decision
but a habit
and trust me
old habits die hard
been clean for 3 days now. doesn't seem like much but this truly is progress for me. to be fair i haven't had access to privacy and a blade in *counts on fingers * 3 days BUT STILL
Nobody Dec 2024
I think I’m going crazy
The voices in my head are getting louder
Unable to think thoughts
Other than what will happen if i eat food
Because somewhere in my brain
Something is telling me
if you gain weight, you will just get bullied again.
You don’t want to go through that again, right?

Nothing but thoughts about food
Cutting
And pills.
To be frank,
The voices need to shut the **** up.
Nobody Nov 2024
they call me she
they call me a liar
they tell me that im not trans
they tell me that I should be set on fire
They call me a sin
They call me fake
They tell me that ill never win
They call me a ****
They call me a creep
I'm just expressing my gender identity.
I just want to *** in the right restroom.
What
The
****
Do
You
Mean
By
That?
Nobody Nov 2024
Think about it
You could easily ****** someone and get away with it
Think about it
You could watch every movie there is
Think about it
You could marry your one and only love
Think about it
You could learn ever gen alpha term, including skibidi ohio rizz

Think about it
You could slash your exes tires
Think about it
You could spend all your life on a couch
Think about it
You could break every law
Think about it
You could walk never in a slouch

Think about it
You could fall in love
Think about it
You could run away
Think about it
You could fight off a bear
Think about it
You could only do these things if you keep living.
Every day.
Please dont **** yourself.
To one of my best friends who struggles with these thoughts everyday.
Nobody May 18
thirty three days
since it last happened
since the blood oozed all over my skin
and i danced alone in my room
covered in red
a bitter, ****** up dancer
spinning, deeper
deeper
deeper
even deeper
into the dark
it hurt so much
but i loved it
the way it gushed out
when i leaped
i hate how warm it made me feel

so i keep twirling into this madness
and try to make it never happen again
33 days clean from self harm.
Nobody Nov 2024
My vision is fuzzy
I'm losing my balance
This isn't real

Peoples words are blended together
I can't read anymore
This isn't real

I tell my hand to do something
And it fails
I drop my cup
This isn't real

Feeling dizzy
I always have
This isn't real

This can't be real
This is just a dream
My whole life
Is a dream
This
Isn't
Real
I get this way a lot, does anyone else?
Nobody Nov 2024
i'm running out of time
i have so much to say
so much in my brain
so many people to betray

i'm running out of time
so much happening in this chaotic world
too many people to correct
too many people to tell "i'm a boy, not a girl."

i'm running out of time
so much to tell you
so much to give you
so many things that aren't true

time time time time time
i need more time
i'm running out of time
please give me more time
you won't regret it, i promise
Nobody Nov 2024
too tired to talk
too tired to get up
too tired to do school work
too tired to care
too tired to eat
too tired to do anything
but
s l o w l y
t y p e
t h i s
a w f u l
p o e t r y
(that took 8 minutes to type. i already had it written down somewhere.)
Nobody Nov 2024
TiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTired­TiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTired­TiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTired­TiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTiredTired­TiredTiredTired
Thats me
Nobody Nov 2024
I'm in the dark
With no light
You actions left a mark
And now im stuck in the endless night

You mocked me
With your torch
I touched the flame
So now my skin is scorched

Youve left me with scars
Beneath the surface
Physical and mental
Geez. Thanks so much for your service.
Nobody Nov 2024
i don't know what's wrong with me
but something was happening so long ago
and it still repeats in my head
makes me want to shut my eyes and go

i don't know what's wrong with me
but i can't talk about it
no matter how hard i try
i'm just to scared to admit that i've been through some ****...

i don't know what's wrong with me
every time i see those awful people
every time there's a loud noise or a crowded room
it just reminds me that the whole world is sheeple

i don't know what's wrong with me
their words repeat in my head in an infinite loop
their mocking keeps coming up
feels like i'm in a boiling *** of trauma soup...

haha i don't ******* know what's wrong with me!!!
Nobody Nov 2024
loud noises
crowded rooms
eating
talking
living
hoping
dreaming
wishing
can't do anything about it
can't do anything without being reminded
Nobody Nov 2024
I think I might not
Trust myself at all right now
Because why should i...
I'm too untrustworthy.
try
Nobody Dec 2024
try
You don’t know what it's like
To try
And try
And try
With no results

You don’t know what it's like
To cry
And cry
And cry
Tears full of salt

You don’t know what it's like
To die
And die
And die
Every second you're alive

You don’t know what it's like
To lie
And lie
And lie
But nothing
Will ever
Ever
Ever
Get better.
its... it has been a very long week
Nobody Nov 2024
i feel like i'm underwater
with nowhere to breathe
movements
s l o w
and
d e l a y e d .

i feel like i'm underwater
with nobody to trust
falling
d e e p e r
and
d e e p e r
into the ocean

i feel like i'm underwater
pressure increasing
lungs popping
no oxygen
no one to trust
going deeper
the hill is steeper
when you're around
you
c o v e r
my
m o u t h
i can't
b r e a t h e

you
w r a p
your
h a n d s
around my throat
and i gasp for air
when you
l e t   g o

but here i am
pretending to be happy as a clam
underwater
...
Nobody Nov 2024
you untie the tangle
the red string has went from loops
and twists
and bends
and now you can see it all...
i bet you regret it
because i wanted you to stop
now you know too much
and now
you'll probably leave me
just like everyone else did
i'm just too much
too much of a mess
a burden
for you to deal with
i'm sorry that what i went through
and what it left me with
hurts you
because i feel like actual worthless ****
but you treat me like a burden
so i must be wrong
because
every
single
*******
time.
i'll tell someone what i go through
and they'll say:
"it's ******* me that you go through that... i don't think we should be friends anymore.".
"friends" slowly (quickly) losing interest
i know they think i'm annoying
they don't have to pretend to like me anymore
i may be neurodivergent
but i'm not stupid
Nobody Nov 2024
Why
How
Could
I
Ever
Think
That
I
Would
Could
Be
Free
Be
Accepted
For who I am
Nobody Nov 2024
Why do I laugh
Why do I sing
Why do I cry
Why do I even try
Whenever I have faith
It always ends up as a lie

Why do I write
Why do I draw
Why do I smile
It's almost never worth while

Make it stop
...
Nobody Mar 3
Came back
Survived the ride
Plunged into dark
Saw the light

I'm back!!!
I will now be posting
Regularly
I missed you all
What doesn't **** me makes me stronger *******
Nobody Nov 2024
Morning of election results
Mourning of election results
A dream of freedom lost on the air.
A hope for a president who will actually care.

Danger is coming
Nobody Nov 2024
it's gotten to the point
where nothing matters
the only reason I keep going
is because I know
there are barely any
but at least some
people that would care
if I just disappeared
They might be the only people that would notice...
Haha
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