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dylan Dec 2020
sitting here
it's 2AM
I'm staring at a wall
the only thoughts I have
are of the memories
we
never
got
to
make
KNS Sep 2020
I am not tethered
Not yet
Not ever
I exist exclusively outside your gaze
I belong to myself now
You will not keep me here,
In fear and in folly
And I, I will not stay
Though I am weary of what awaits me
No!
Let me rise, now
The strength of my atonement and courage
Will protect me
As I wonder into a page without your expectations of failure.
Yes!
I choose to be free.
I have chosen sobriety for nearly six weeks. This is an ode to myself and everything I am becoming.
Isabella Aug 2020
2am
My gaze tracing the lines on the ceiling
2am and I hope my heart’s healing
My body’s numb to any real feeling
As I hear my mind’s worries revealing

I hate that hardly anyone likes me
And the few who do still might leave
I hate that I’m laying here crying
Which will lead to puffy eyes in the morning

I wish I could just love myself first
Or at least go back to when I felt sure
I wish I could be my own shelter
Away from a world where I get hurt

My fingers tracing the tears staining my cheeks
My sobs dulling the ache inside me
2am and my skull is still spiraling
As the black abyss of the night tries to hide me
now i’ll try to sleep
Alina Aug 2020
Slowly suffocating in ink
Thinking this will somehow make
living life any easier

Thinking and thinking
And eating and eating
Cake at 2 o’clock in the morning
Trying to forget

Cloud over my head
Pouring out blood,
sweat and tears
from the days of
Helping you survive

Head held up high
in desperation
Praying and praying
that I don’t drown

Slowly suffocating
And restricting any other love
for my mind, body and soul
Putting you first was the
Utmost worse decision I have
ever made in my life.

Because years later
I’m still drowning in my own sorrows
from back in those days
When I loved you.
Soxna la Donna Jul 2020
I dreamed I lost my teeth last night.

Oh dear, I fear the loss.

Feeling of a void, I wish I could hold you tight.

I recorded 5 voice messages, please don't avoid me.

I told you I won't listen to what they say.

Critics always bite you even when you enjoy your day.

Our ego ruins everything, I overthink.

It is 2:03 am in the morning and I am struggling with this bad feeling.

Donna...
That Girl Jun 2020
It’s that time again.
It’s 2am again.
It’s time to look to the right side of my bed and feel sad.
It’s time to wonder why it’s still empty.
It’s time for me to make a list of why it is empty.
It’s time for me to be ******* myself.
It’s time for me to wonder where I went wrong.
It’s time for me to make a list of all my mistakes.
It’s time to feel sorry for myself.
It’s time for me to break my own heart.
Again.
It’s time for me to play over what men have said to me in the past.
It’s time for my old tinder messages to haunt me.
“Unless I can eat that *** and ***** from the back before marriage Christian girls aren’t as fun.”
“Would you be interested in a nice thick 8 inch ****?”
“I’m looking for a more physically intimate relationship.”
It’s time for me to remind myself the reason why my bed is empty.
Men want the one thing that I can’t give them,
And without my body I am nothing to them.
All I am is what’s between my legs and what’s under my shirt.
And with my legs crossed and my top on,
what could I possibly offer them?
It’s time for me remember that while my choice maybe the right choice,
It’s also the lonely choice.
It’s time for me to remember that even though it feels like it’s my fault,
It’s not.
It’s time for me to daydream until I fall asleep.
Again.
Karly Codr Jun 2020
You say you know who I am.
But you don't.
You only know the part of me that I show to you.
You only know the girl
     That loves music more than the ordinary person,
     That talks to herself,
     That doodles flowers on her arms during class,
     That buries her face in a book,
     That still has all her music downloaded on an Mp3 player,
     That sings Taylor Swift songs into her hairbrush.
You don't know the girl
     That stays up until 2am sobbing into her pillow,
     That feels like she's never enough,
     That masks her depression behind fakes smiles and laughter,
     That keeps her feelings hidden away,
                              until they blow up and she cries over a broken shoelace,
     That she hopes for the next day to be better than the previous day.
You say you know who I am.
At least you think you do.
I'm sorry. But you don't.
Everyone thinks that they know who I am but it is only me that know who I am.
Felicity Paris Apr 2020
This is all turning real
And our past is catching up to us
The talks we had at 12 AM
Are the talks we have at 2 PM
Not quite the strangers to reality
That we were so long ago
I am not sure if I can stand this
When all our worst-case scenarios
Are what we wake up to each day
KleeKlee Mar 2020
You don’t know true fear
Until you’re awake

At 2 am

Waiting for them to respond

Hoping they’re okay
Hoping they’re okay
Hoping they’re okay
Hoping they’re okay

Hoping they’re

Actually alive
I could pass out from exhaustion
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