I thought the stars had aligned
I thought he was meant to be mine
I opened myself to him
Heart in hand
Offered him the best version
Of who I am
He was my only lover
But to him
I was only another

Does life have a meaning?
Are we souls, bound in mortal shells?
Could we ever know the way-
To heaven, away from hell?

Hell, what if this is it?
No ascension, one life, one day?
And with a single mistake-
Does it all go away?

I'm scared, shaking in fear,
Could we comprehend a purpose?
Or once the candle is snuffed-
Is the melted wax worthless?

I’ve never received a flower
Or even a rose
But I’m a guy
So it’s acceptable I suppose
No kisses
Or sweets
No treats
That signifies ones feelings for me
No token of ones love
But I have gotten
Disappointment
Watered with hate
Planted in betrayal
Fertilized with lies
And maintained by fakes
Roses are Red
But my roses are dead
And crumble beneath my feet

When I was younger, I used to think I was going to be a Star.
Under a spotlight where everyone knew my name...
I was five.

Now, I want shadows and to be as far away as possible.
Hidden and far from consequence,
And even further from myself.
Where my name is not a name,
But just another word without any true meaning.

When I was younger, I used to think I was going to be a Star.
Now, I want to disappear.

I should have jumped overboard when I had the chance.

The suffocating feeling when you lose your purpose
It’s so uncomfortable, I suppose
To lose that light on the horizon
It’s very arduous thinking for a reason

A reason to live
A purpose that I believe
That I can traverse blade and fire
Just for that reason, my desire

When problems fade, when reasons wane
We seek for burdens to weigh us in the world of the mundane
The feeling of weightlessness we don’t much entertain
We seek, have seen, and then seek another once again

It’s very ironic the purpose of the past
We hope to be relieved from our crosses
But when we do relieve it, our minds become lost
No driving force left, we then hope it never ceases

Problems are a proof of life
For problems is life’s unending strife
Solve it then seek anew
Let’s solve them without further ado

My problems, my blessings
Thanks be to god for these things
Without stress, there’s no joy in relaxation
If there’s only rest, we’ll be full of vexation

There is a six sided utopia’s that exist within everyone
You may not know it but it has been with you since the beginning
Such a wonderful place free of worry and conflict is gone
In there, no one is above you, only you are reigning

What is wrong and right is dictated by the person residing
Your consciousness is the only thing that exist, the proof that you are living
Not even your shadow found, the place is full of nothing
The loneliness you feel in here isn’t a curse but a blessing

A place without a trace of happiness there will never be a trace of misery
A place without anyone to love is a place without a vestige of fury
Here there is no companionship but solitude it is graciously giving
Without anyone to leave there is no sadness in parting

Within yourself you can learn to find joy and happiness
But you shall never find it when loved ones leave, only bitterness
The world within the six walls is a much better place
For in here there is no one to judge you no matter the ability, personality, face and race

Reality is full of cruelty, sin, deceit, death, pain and strife
This is an unbeatable game, the game we call life
No one can be blamed when people give up playing
This is such a harsh reality, I’m just saying

In this three dimensional utopia solace is what people seek
All types of people from fierce, cold, serious and meek
They come to ease the pain, cease the grieving and put sorrow to an end
They come to forget regrets and think that their mistakes never happened

This six sided heaven is found within our minds
In here only freedom reigns, no laws that binds
When all is ruined and gone, when the battle has been lost
We retreat to our boxes, our fates to destiny we entrust

I am a dreamer of wonderful worlds
Where stories of sorrows remain untold
Where joy and happiness are found on every chapter
And my life is a book that brings you laughter

I woke up, and now it’s time to live my life
It is a journey filled with cruelty and strife
And here, I am a coward who hides in his shell
My dream is heaven while my life is hell

To change my road is what I require
But the current have forced me the way
To bare my heart is what I desire
But I fear what others will say

How can I face this treacherous current
If all I have is weakness
Where can I find this worldly strength
If I’m blinded by my own meekness

Woe is me for I have forsaken living
To forget my pain, sorrow and misgiving
To escape this torturous reality
I yearn for my fantasy

She used to be human.
She use to have fun.
She used to be talkative
She used to be alive.

Her emotions run her life into the ground.
Her fun turned into pain.
Her voice doesn't have strength to talk.
She's alive, but only her body is here.