I am getting used to it
No message from you
No chat from me
Maybe i'm getting there

Day by day
I feel courage
Day by day
I feel strength

Everything is temporary
And this pain is no exception
This hurt will go away
Someday I'll be free

In time there'll be no more tears
Nor bitterness caged in my chest
No more racing thoughts in my head
Nor an image of a woman at night who weeps

Day by day
My heart will get used to it
Not being with you
And not kissing your lips.

Day by day
I'll get back to my feet
With my head up high
And a victorious smile on my face.

When that time comes
I'll know I have no regrets
Because in my heart I know
For what we had, I did my best.

You made a poet fall in love with you
And expected her not to write sonnets about your eyes
Haikus about the way you kissed her in the moonlight
Expected the fire in her heart not to inspire couplets
You made a poet fall in love with you, and when you left
Expected her not to write pages about the ache in her chest
Write a soliloquy dedicated to her tears
Expected her not to feel every gut wrenching moment of the pen hitting paper like your words hit her in the most vulnerable places of her mind.
You made a poet fall in love with you, and you expected her to be silent.
That is no fault of hers.

You know those moments
where you just feel so
worthless
for no reason.
Like out of the
blue
the entire world
comes crashing
d
o
w
n
even though you were
feeling perfectly fine
the minute before.

All of a sudden
someone calls you over
or asks for you
and you realize you're so
angry
and there's so much just
bubbling inside
and it comes out.

Except it's not what you expect.

All of a sudden
you find yourself feeling so
tired
and
weak
and all you want to do
is lay down and
dig yourself a hole.

All of a sudden
you want to be buried
but not die.

Every time you breathe,
you feel all of this
anguish
deep in the pit
of your stomach and
in the centre of your chest
and it makes you want to
claw your insides out.

But you don't want to die
because somewhere
deep
deep
inside your mind
you enjoy it.

You enjoy
this sadness
and this pain
and these tears
and all the hurt.
The hurt that makes you
want to disappear
and hide away
and run
and sleep
and fall
and curl up
all at once.

All of a sudden
you're so worthless
so meaningless
and you...
You're not even sure
how you feel
you're just angry
and annoyed
and sad
and everything.

It's so much,
and you can't even register
what's happening.

You just lie there
and enjoy the feeling
in the centre of your chest
and in the pit of your stomach.

You lie there
and do nothing.
Nothing
because that's all
you can do
and all you amount to.
Nothing.

If a tree falls
When no one's around
How do we know
If it still makes a sound?
If a star disappears
And no one sees it go
Then how, I ask you
Did we know it ever glowed?
If a girl hides her pain
And pretends that she's fine
How will anyone know
That she's dying inside?

I didn't take you back
just to be treated
the same
*******
way
AGAIN

I don't want to be second
I don't want to be taken for granted
I want you to put my love on top

You are everything to me
Why can't I be everything to you?