Scars, that I’ve been hiding all my life
With scarves
Bruises, witness of what the truth is
Red eyes, brimming pearls of lost truces
Yelling, Blaming and banners of ‘Deserved it’
Never saw the alarm signs
They were not bold enough, like me
Always told that I’m fine, when I couldn’t even breathe
Maybe it’s been hash on me lately and
I don’t wanna make you too feel low
Maybe just pull me closer and never let me go
Cause the scars are now aching
And the bruises, deep blue
The pearls are now sold for ground breaking news
The yelling has me shaken; I stand with heart that’s broken
Too many times like my body
But you’re innocent, oddly.
Scarves, that have been hiding scars for long
I put them free
Cause I again, wanna feel like me.

Every time I go under the covers,
My eyes long to find you.
Is it just a euphoric essence, or am I really falling?
Oh! I’m so afraid of telling.
Some days I wake up with your bold eyes staring at me, when I hallucinate.
Some nights you’re just a sweet swimmer swimming in my ocean, when I hallucinate.
When nights are so long,
And I can barely sleep,
I rest upon your figure, when I hallucinate.
You have no name, no face, no game, no race
Only a someone whom I rely on
My chance to escape, a feeling of being loved.
Oh darling, Let’s meet there again,
When I hallucinate.

It’s not what you think
It’s what I made you to believe in
I censor it
Paranoia pulling deep ends
My words are bruised
Coming straight from heart of warrior
Losing a truce
Counting days when we were merrier
I see them staring deep,
Fishing my answers and my secrets
It’s like I am, an open book easy to tear which
Can be thrown away whenever you would want to
Hold it sternly, it has stories of
scars with faint blues
I yell at my heart with all strength that I’ve left
To speak up against insecurities and deep anxiousness
Someone will hold your hand only if you put it forward
And leave you too,
If its fed with fake jolly smiles and pictures
I’ll tell you this truth,
If I’m ever being honest.
But that’s the thing....
I’m never being honest.

They say its all because I reflect the traits so true,
Little do they know.
It’s a fake picture long back which I drew.
They say I am the same,
I am the same badge holder,
Little do they know.
New expectations are like boulder.
They say I won’t change,
That they can still trust me,
Little do they know.
Its a fake picture, It’s a stuck mask.
Who am I under?
Is still unkown at last!
Little do they know,
Little do they know.

We were just like sailors in the pleasant ocean breeze
Sailed past each other
With heart beats that increased,
Don’t wanna keep you as a distant memory.
I've been staying up late thinking about you all night
Wondering if you too felt the soulmate connection
As we sailed past each other
In the pleasant ocean breeze.

A thud sound
Of me falling?
From the sky height
Into the deep sea.
This internal unfamiliar silence  of the waters below,
Is eating me up.
Can you hear me?
I scream with my throat dry,
I dream with my hopes high,
The shallow waters Don’t echo my voice,
So I'm letting go a deeper dive.
This external familiar voice of everything above the sea –
my success or failure?
Makes me bury myself into the truth more deep
Makes me worried of the soul which never came to me
So, I shut my eyes
See a bright yellow light
Run toward it to seize a whole new sight
Calmness of  the internals
Don't excite my bored old soul.
But I still am worried about my past above the sea.
A swish sound
Of me rising.
Back from the deep sea into the high sky
Never thought I will give up of being shy
With a motive to live,
With wings to fly,
With a hope to dream,
Which my failure had taught me.

I want to cry and weep,
Hate the world and streets.
Find the direction spread,
Filled with humorous cracks.
Tears provoke me again,
Becomes the second shelly.
Feed me in the blossom,
I request my lord.
Your creations mockut,
For thy loveliest child,
Metiril of pride and anger.
Make me colorful ashes,
Buried, no burn makes me immortal,
Under of horiziner of sky.

Lately I’ve been thinking ‘bout some boys
Cause of ‘em I’ve gained a little poise
But one of them really stands out, no lies
Got me infatuated with his eyes
And lately I’ve been painting his face,
Caught me staring many times, no disgrace
Friends all say he’s got me losing my mind
I tell ‘em that I’m really really fine
He’s got tagging along, a long line
Of girls and guys waiting to see him smile
I’m another adorer at his shrine
Devoting all my love, life, all my time
Lately I'm forgetting who I was
Orbiting him all day with no cause
And I know I won't be able to confess
Cause mouthing all those words
Gives me stress.
Lord save me from this adolescent mess!

Tell me if you do
Cause I'll tell you back
Take a friend's help or use a love hack
You've tortured me enough already, honey
Don't tell me the names of the girls you've been with all this while
It's time for you to come back to me.
Do you still have your part of the fate string? Cause I've kept mine safe with me.
Oh, my pretty soulmate, you’re bound with me, just like how I'm bound with you.
So, tell me when we're meeting to reunite the thread.
when you're going to tell me you love me.
Cause you know I'll say it back

When you look into my eyes
and say words I can’t hear
I want you besides me
When I shed my midnight tears
I tell myself that I love you, But do I?
I don’t even know the colour of your eyes
Is it because I don’t know you or
Because I have lost the courage to know
When you look into my eyes
And say words I can’t hear
I look away with crimson red
And shed my tear in a blink
I am building up the courage,
To look into your eyes so bright  
And tell you all my feelings that I’ve caged through the night
But Oh dear! When you look into my eyes
And say words I still can’t hear
Then I’ll be swimming in your heavenly orbs
Least would I care
I again lost the courage to know if they’re
Blue or black?
I’m preparing myself for your next handsome attack.