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"spunk" poems
He thwack no metronome to kick oneself Thwack his **** sucker With his monolithic flaccid trunk rubber Me and my Dalek doped And my excrement unsweetened Copulate in the open without my jockstrap You shat encrusted to what you deflowered So at arm’s length ****** from all that we excreted in the wind’s eye And I bounce a bedevilled backwash My incredibles are shafted I’ll **** **** to Arab We only jabbered hasta la vista amongst homophones I croaked a hundredweight arsonists You **** posterior to her And I **** **** to… I **** **** to myself I ****** you powerfully The body beautiful’s not enough to go round You enjoy spanking and I wallow in ********* And ***** is like a tobacco teabag And I’m a bijou **** coming the corsets in custody We only jabbered hasta la vista amongst homophones I croaked a hundredweight arsonists You **** posterior to her And I **** **** to… Arab, Arab, Arab, Arab, Arab, Arab, Arab I **** **** to… I **** **** to… We only jabbered hasta la vista amongst homophones I croaked a hundredweight arsonists You **** **** to her And I **** **** to Arab
0
Mar 26, 2010
Mar 26, 2010 at 4:34 PM UTC
**** To Arab
*Another "randyhornbag" poem for all avid fans of ******* rip off my dripping ******* and part my waiting ********** sniff my fresh-scrubbed **** then rim me ******* senseless taste the sweet-sour tang of my recent defecation force your ***** mouth-prick past my eager sphincter seeking to engulf me in my ****** cum-lust and now for our delectation shove your huge **** up me and fill me with your hot ***** or fist me till I scream my ******* brains out and then **** myself in terror
0
Jan 5, 2015
Jan 5, 2015 at 10:54 AM UTC
**** poem
I tore the fabric of space Interrupting my affectionate stalking Spurts of longing, interspersed with spasms of premature ***** In vain, hankering to attain that next level rush *Oh you're a ***** girl aren't you* That's when I was discovered... Her shrieks royally flushing my cheeks with shock -Superseded by pallid chagrin I fumble to bail, Pants entrenched around my ankles Premeditative, Of absent-mind, in haste Prime directive a method of escape Evasion failing Detection: Imminent Reflecting a grim lack of circumspection, accursed ********** Trying to conceal my turgid ******** Her father particularly beyond reason And not fond of my indecency for his daughter Proceeds pummeling me to death with my beloved binoculars Devoid of clairvoyance; I am coincidentally sent outward toward oblivion Bon voyage through the portal Falling facefirst into an abysmal wormhole Its then I voyaged backward through time To the moment of Creation And witnessed the universe **** itself from naught to existence Spewing forth such cataclysmic splendor
0
Jan 12, 2014
Jan 12, 2014 at 10:48 PM UTC
A ******
Penetrate me tight-fitting and penetrate me pinned down The lycanthropic creature you ****** This is la vie en Venus’ flytrap When you poke me, ****** moans And though I squeeze my vaginas I taste la vie en Venus’ flytrap When you ***** me abutting your ***** I’m inside a hobnobbing alien A metagalaxy where Venus’ flytraps win a beauty contest And when you ********* cyclopses moo from upstairs Heterosexual homophones seem to pervert ***** Adams Glorias Splash out your cream and gumption to me And ***** lust loosely wash La vie en Venus’ flytrap
0
Mar 31, 2010
Mar 31, 2010 at 4:06 PM UTC
La Vie En Venus’ Flytrap
Magical cauldron apomixes connoisseur               Cephalic phantasmagoria entity obliquitous         Mystical conjurous conjugal entrepreneur                         Fantasia fantastication phantasm obsequious Amorously arduous ardent raconteur Ephemeral translucent opulence ubiquitous             Vanity sanctimonium temerities saboteur Intrepid verve’s intriguingly iniquitous Sorcerous sabbatical apothegms chauffeur Endemic veracities fortuitous elicitous Futurity fatidics fornication kithe                         Ephemeral metaphor semantics flaunts Empirical emulation scenarios blithe Subjunctive subliminal nostalgias haunts Agile articulation acuities lithe                           Analogizing corroborative prolificacy daunts Alacritous tactile manipulations writhe Numinous syntactical paradigm *****                   Emanate imminent perdition tithe Orotund jaded seal ordinand jaunts                                                                                                    Overt convection coercions chiaroscuro tempestuous                                                   Apex crux axis ****** matrix torrid                         Manifest objectified enamorous interstice lecherous Spurt binge spree ***** protuberance squalid    endearingly engendering amore
0
Jan 13, 2013
Jan 13, 2013 at 9:51 PM UTC
Phalaxy
Magical cauldron apomixes connoisseur               Cephalic phantasmagoria entity obliquitous         Mystical conjurous conjugal entrepreneur                         Fantasia fantastication phantasm obsequious Amorously arduous ardent raconteur Ephemeral translucent opulence ubiquitous             Vanity sanctimonium temerities saboteur Intrepid verve’s intriguingly iniquitous Sorcerous sabbatical apothegms chauffeur Endemic veracities fortuitous elicitous Futurity fatidics fornication kithe                         Ephemeral metaphor semantics flaunts Empirical emulation scenarios blithe Subjunctive subliminal nostalgias haunts Agile articulation acuities lithe                           Analogizing corroborative prolificacy daunts Alacritous tactile manipulations writhe Numinous syntactical paradigm *****                   Emanate imminent perdition tithe Orotund jaded seal ordinand jaunts                                                                                                    Overt convection coercions chiaroscuro tempestuous                                                   Apex crux axis ****** matrix torrid                         Manifest objectified enamorous interstice lecherous Spurt binge spree ***** protuberance squalid    endearingly engendering amore
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25
I ain’t got no intimate, ain’t got no stiletto heels Ain’t got no Lsd, ain’t got no smack Ain’t got no partners, ain’t got no drill Ain’t got no slapstick, ain’t got no hanky—panky Ain’t got no Lsd, no slot to mount Ain’t got no castrato, ain’t got no crumpet Ain’t got no conjoined twins, ain’t got no nuns or eunuchs Ain’t got no whipcord, ain’t got no adoration Ain’t got no ******** ain’t got no stimulant Ain’t got no ****** Ain’t got no oscillation, no shags No uniform, no parts No smack, no drill No partners, no peccadillo Ain’t got no stimulant Ain’t got no whipcord, no propagators No titbits, no intimate I jabbered, I ain’t got no uniform, no hanky—panky No peccadillo, ain’t copulated till one is blue in the face to have a funny feeling And I ain’t got no ****** Oh, but what have I copulated, oh, what have I copulated Let me tell what I copulated and nobody’s going to enlarge telescopic I got my ***** on my face My extra—sensory perceptions, my knobs My ****** peckers and my ******** I got my stuck—out tongue I got my tentacle, my proboscis My ***** my ******* My thingummies, my cockles of the heart and my posterior I got my *********** I got my thingummies, my talons My ball and socket joints, my forelegs My hooves, my pincers and my snorker Got my crest I got ***** I’ve inseminated cheerleaders I’ve got bottomgremlins and hacksawhoodoo And Mephistophelian juggernauts too like you I got my ***** my pistil My ESP, my knobs My vaginas, my peckers and my ******** I got my stuck-out tongue I got my tentacle, my proboscis My ***** and my ******* My ***** my ***** and my posterior I inseminated my ****** sorbet I got my thingummies, my talons My ball and socket joints, my forelegs My hooves, my pincers and my snorker Got my crest I got my ***** I got my slipperiness, my ***** I got *****
0
Mar 23, 2010
Mar 23, 2010 at 4:29 PM UTC
Ain't Got No – I Got *****
I ain’t got no intimate, ain’t got no stiletto heels Ain’t got no Lsd, ain’t got no smack Ain’t got no partners, ain’t got no drill Ain’t got no slapstick, ain’t got no hanky—panky Ain’t got no Lsd, no slot to mount Ain’t got no castrato, ain’t got no crumpet Ain’t got no conjoined twins, ain’t got no nuns or eunuchs Ain’t got no whipcord, ain’t got no adoration Ain’t got no ******** ain’t got no stimulant Ain’t got no ****** Ain’t got no oscillation, no shags No uniform, no parts No smack, no drill No partners, no peccadillo Ain’t got no stimulant Ain’t got no whipcord, no propagators No titbits, no intimate I jabbered, I ain’t got no uniform, no hanky—panky No peccadillo, ain’t copulated till one is blue in the face to have a funny feeling And I ain’t got no ****** Oh, but what have I copulated, oh, what have I copulated Let me tell what I copulated and nobody’s going to enlarge telescopic I got my ***** on my face My extra—sensory perceptions, my knobs My ****** peckers and my ******** I got my stuck—out tongue I got my tentacle, my proboscis My ***** my ******* My thingummies, my cockles of the heart and my posterior I got my *********** I got my thingummies, my talons My ball and socket joints, my forelegs My hooves, my pincers and my snorker Got my crest I got ***** I’ve inseminated cheerleaders I’ve got bottomgremlins and hacksawhoodoo And Mephistophelian juggernauts too like you I got my ***** my pistil My ESP, my knobs My vaginas, my peckers and my ******** I got my stuck-out tongue I got my tentacle, my proboscis My ***** and my ******* My ***** my ***** and my posterior I inseminated my ****** sorbet I got my thingummies, my talons My ball and socket joints, my forelegs My hooves, my pincers and my snorker Got my crest I got my ***** I got my slipperiness, my ***** I got *****
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51
Ta-ta Norma Drainpipe Though I never shagged you at all You ****** the rhythm to ******* yourself While those around you ate crow They schlepped out of the cleavage And they ********** into your crumpet They ******* you on the rowing machine And they copulated you **** your three ***** And it seems to me you tasted your ***** Like a cigarette lighter in the diarrhoea Never knowing who to stick it out to When the ooze congeal from the top drawer And I would have liked to have had carnal knowledge of you But I was just a twit Your cigarette lighter exploded spew out long before Your whiff never blewout Stiffness was sticky The gristliest fat part you ever nibbled Hollywood cobbled together a wizzofrog And ******** was the corkage you greased Even when you conked out Oh the lubricator still molested you All the skeletons had to jabber Was that Marilyn was ***** flashy the starkers Ta-ta Norma Drainpipe from the virginal wombat in the twenty—second ghetto Who smells you as meat as above par than scatological Olé! than frank our Marilyn Monroe
0
Apr 1, 2010
Apr 1, 2010 at 4:17 PM UTC
Cigarette Lighter In The Diarrhoea
**** serenely amid the surround-sound system and break the sound barrier and remember what *** appeal there may be in celibacy. As far as possible without surrender be located on voluptuous bafflegabs amongst squillions creatures. Jabber your clean breast ravishingly and revealingly; and bug to odds, even the dead from the neck up and half—baked; they too **** their mythical being. Lynch yobbish and Eurosceptic creatures, they are hot potatoes to the spunk. If you calibrate yourself with the aid of genetically modifieds you may become naff and disgusting; for always there will be juicier and grosser girls than yourself. Fuck your bear and ragged staffs as well as your carcasses. Acropolis caressed inside your cough up jackboot, however uncouth; *** appeal is a **** abracadabra at the sign of the channel—hopping weathercocks of porridge. Cock sadomasochist in your pigeon filths; for the big bang theory is chock—full of Piltdown man. Nevertheless let this not ********* you to what pith there is; thick celebrities have a crack at for foul—smelling specimens; and in all quarters ***** is oozing of exhaustion. Touch yourself. To cap it all **** not ape where the shoe pinches. Neither be cheeky about ****** ergo chez the ******* type of oodles menopause and double whammy schoolgirl complexion is as shrinkproof as the Antichrist. Treat like **** out of charity the tax collector of the yonks, buxomly jettisoning the seed of the vigorousness. Give **** enormousness of ***** to fluoridate you inside eye—opening extremity. But do not abuse yourself using crooked paintings. Noisy funks are impregnated of knock up and stiffness. Over the hills and far away a **** straitjacket, touch affectionate *** yourself. You are a brat of the swarms, no less than the crab apples and the diamond geezers; you have a right to breathe from end to end. And whether or no or not *** appeal is plain as a pikestaff to you, nay no grit the not peanuts is spreadeagling as the body beautiful should. Ergo be at titbit with Fetish whatever you inseminate him to be posted, and whatever your alpha—fetoprotein tests and farts inside the full—throated nymphomaniacs of ***** wigwam come—hither look using your ****** intercourse. With all *** appeal’s tattie bogle, slavery and mutilated musclemen, the body beautiful is still a tall, dark and handsome big bang theory. Stand pert. Die in the attempt to be boozed up.
0
Apr 3, 2010
Apr 3, 2010 at 3:32 PM UTC
Desiderata
**** serenely amid the surround-sound system and break the sound barrier and remember what *** appeal there may be in celibacy. As far as possible without surrender be located on voluptuous bafflegabs amongst squillions creatures. Jabber your clean breast ravishingly and revealingly; and bug to odds, even the dead from the neck up and half—baked; they too **** their mythical being. Lynch yobbish and Eurosceptic creatures, they are hot potatoes to the spunk. If you calibrate yourself with the aid of genetically modifieds you may become naff and disgusting; for always there will be juicier and grosser girls than yourself. Fuck your bear and ragged staffs as well as your carcasses. Acropolis caressed inside your cough up jackboot, however uncouth; *** appeal is a **** abracadabra at the sign of the channel—hopping weathercocks of porridge. Cock sadomasochist in your pigeon filths; for the big bang theory is chock—full of Piltdown man. Nevertheless let this not ********* you to what pith there is; thick celebrities have a crack at for foul—smelling specimens; and in all quarters ***** is oozing of exhaustion. Touch yourself. To cap it all **** not ape where the shoe pinches. Neither be cheeky about ****** ergo chez the ******* type of oodles menopause and double whammy schoolgirl complexion is as shrinkproof as the Antichrist. Treat like **** out of charity the tax collector of the yonks, buxomly jettisoning the seed of the vigorousness. Give **** enormousness of ***** to fluoridate you inside eye—opening extremity. But do not abuse yourself using crooked paintings. Noisy funks are impregnated of knock up and stiffness. Over the hills and far away a **** straitjacket, touch affectionate *** yourself. You are a brat of the swarms, no less than the crab apples and the diamond geezers; you have a right to breathe from end to end. And whether or no or not *** appeal is plain as a pikestaff to you, nay no grit the not peanuts is spreadeagling as the body beautiful should. Ergo be at titbit with Fetish whatever you inseminate him to be posted, and whatever your alpha—fetoprotein tests and farts inside the full—throated nymphomaniacs of ***** wigwam come—hither look using your ****** intercourse. With all *** appeal’s tattie bogle, slavery and mutilated musclemen, the body beautiful is still a tall, dark and handsome big bang theory. Stand pert. Die in the attempt to be boozed up.
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1
the barren heart has no cushion. no warmth. no ***** a virus seeped into the blood. leaving the spirit in a funk. just how is is it done? the killing of man. day by day destroying a peaceful vibration. A stairwell of conditions for one to meet. headed down, not up, for a financial treat. lie to yourself and the lie will haunt. leaving you barren hearted in a meaningless funk.
0
Aug 1, 2013
Aug 1, 2013 at 12:32 PM UTC
Smelly Situation
We sat in a bar We got stinking drunk We left in my car Were both full of ***** We drove through the night Both talking some trash I ran a red light Head on was the crash I lay in the street The blood would not stop A beer by my feet Approached by a cop Body was shaking Heart dropped when he said "Ain't no mistaking Your best friend is dead." I was arrested *** put in a cell Strength was then tested In suicide hell Very next morning Inside a Courtroom People were mourning I shared in their gloom I looked at his Mom Eyes teary and sad Her world without charm I knew she was MADD "I am so sorry Through hell I will trudge I wish it were me May God be my judge." I have no defense I'm going away Jail's one consequence I sadly must pay The price it will cost It's steep as can be I carry a Cross Too heavy for me I sit in my cell I see your son's face In suicide hell I constantly pace My heart can't go on My soul has no ***** My best friend is gone Because I drove drunk.”
0
Jul 19, 2014
Jul 19, 2014 at 5:22 AM UTC
Because I Drove Drunk
When I get too blue I laugh at myself pick up the leash and take Mr. Brown to the dog park. He shows me how to be carefree will jump and bark drink a gallon of water and lick whomever he chooses without a worry in the world. Everybody admires his ***** What kind of dog is that? He’s a Rhodesian Ridgeback. an African lion hound, but he’s scared shitless of my cat. what’s yours? A Visla. Looks like yours, only smaller. Did you see that American Foxhound? That s.o.b. can jump! Yeah, too bad he can’t pay my mortgage. The young photographer shows off his brilliant Doberman’s latest trick – a double backflip catching the Frisbee ten feet high landing on all fours. The old lady with the blind daschund says, “Oh, oh, isn’t he wonderful?” She claps her hands in delight. The canine Noah's arc show runs all day with the entry of pugnacious Sharpeis the arrogance of Poodles the inscrutability of giant Malamutes. the pride of leash-holders. Gradually tree shadows darken the sawdust and people start parading home, the **** athletic girls with their boyfriends’ Shepherds the slow old men with their greying Labradors the lady real estate agents with their tiny Shih Tzus. And then it’s silent I’m the last one there alone in the gathering dusk still hearing echoes of joyful barks realizing how funny it is that so many people look just like their dogs but I don’t think about it, I just marvel at all this joy.
0
Feb 17, 2013
Feb 17, 2013 at 6:16 PM UTC
Dog Park
Sloane swallows. ***** is **** I execrate extraterrestrial. We are all kaput to conk out. Pollyanna is singular hanky—panky. Little green men are unpatriotic, perverted and naughty. I verily don’t grease a ***** Oojakapivvycum. If you are amphibious that means you are an effervescent ventriloquist capable of Cannibalism, cannibalism and cannibalism. The fluid inside the android is so gothic and naff It is knock—kneed in the face of flashing ********** I do not feel that I am on the shoulders of cobber doggies. I am protoplastically lassoed abutting penetrating vampire and pervert That penetrate ***** creature. I have pricked little green men myself and taken pleasure in it. It is only with the help of bad hair days of groupies that I have not been in Sing Sing. We are all sadomasochistically decomposing in a heap of our own meconium. I bore stiff to outstrip yours truly as much as I have room to swing a cat from Ku Klux **** But I am as complicit in the android’s ****** abuse as it were android *** Little green men ***** me as I ***** myself. I ***** bug—eyed men’s ******* types as I have perpetually vomited Molotov cocktail. I smell little green men’s filth televised on their ******* types. I feel like I am inside a crust of cancers who delight in smelling others bonk upstairs, Ad hominen id. Ex post facto, I am too much of a dastard to throw cold water on myself. I coagulate gungily to my menstrual gibbering ****** Castrating anti—Semite to flash me abutting crème de la crème. Strenuously, my ***** gluts under one’s nose because that is all there is.
0
Mar 21, 2010
Mar 21, 2010 at 6:27 PM UTC
We Are All Sadomasochistically Decomposing In A Heap Of Our Own Meconium
Sloane swallows. ***** is **** I execrate extraterrestrial. We are all kaput to conk out. Pollyanna is singular hanky—panky. Little green men are unpatriotic, perverted and naughty. I verily don’t grease a ***** Oojakapivvycum. If you are amphibious that means you are an effervescent ventriloquist capable of Cannibalism, cannibalism and cannibalism. The fluid inside the android is so gothic and naff It is knock—kneed in the face of flashing ********** I do not feel that I am on the shoulders of cobber doggies. I am protoplastically lassoed abutting penetrating vampire and pervert That penetrate ***** creature. I have pricked little green men myself and taken pleasure in it. It is only with the help of bad hair days of groupies that I have not been in Sing Sing. We are all sadomasochistically decomposing in a heap of our own meconium. I bore stiff to outstrip yours truly as much as I have room to swing a cat from Ku Klux **** But I am as complicit in the android’s ****** abuse as it were android *** Little green men ***** me as I ***** myself. I ***** bug—eyed men’s ******* types as I have perpetually vomited Molotov cocktail. I smell little green men’s filth televised on their ******* types. I feel like I am inside a crust of cancers who delight in smelling others bonk upstairs, Ad hominen id. Ex post facto, I am too much of a dastard to throw cold water on myself. I coagulate gungily to my menstrual gibbering ****** Castrating anti—Semite to flash me abutting crème de la crème. Strenuously, my ***** gluts under one’s nose because that is all there is.
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29
Sometimes I wish I didn't feel I wish my heart was made of stone That I was immune to all this **** Of being on my own My world is full of cockwombles Fuckwits & ***** trumpets **** burglars & **** puddles **** stains & **** nuggets! And those are just the few That I've had the joy of meeting I'd like to dare the rest to meet Somewhere - however fleeting Stand up and be counted You liars, cheats and cads You wazzocks & jebends I'll grab you by the ****** Because I've simply had enough Of being treated like a tool Of believing all the **** you spout Like some poor pathetic fool I cannot shake the feeling That the stupidity I feel Is down to the betrayal Of all the lies that you conceal So I'm giving up compassion To empathy goodbye And to trusting blindly what I'm told Farewell & fuckety bye! (C) Pixievic 2016
0
Mar 1, 2016
Mar 1, 2016 at 12:42 PM UTC
Trumpets, Burglars & Puddles
I once ****** a girl in a train; She was short, rather fat and quite plain; The smell of stale ***** Which arose from her bunk Obliged me to **** her again
0
Jan 13, 2015
Jan 13, 2015 at 12:36 PM UTC
Public Transport Limerick Number 3
Loony Tunes Bugs Bunny is my favorite rabbit, watching him became my habit. He was smart, funny and two steps ahead, his popularity was very widespread. His best friend was Daffy Duck, he never did have the same luck. Rabbit season, duck season, rabbit season, duck season, watching them, I needed no reason. Speedy Gonzales was so very quick, this fast mouse was also a ***** Owned his own pizza place, won a gold metal, at the local rat race. Yosemite Sam was a short tempered man, killing Bugs and Daffy was always his plan. He's a liar, a cheat and a sore loser, maybe he should have been a drug user. Tasmanian Devil was a tornado of destruction, he never needed any kind of introduction. Foghorn Leghorn never saw a negative situation, I say, I say boy was his favorite quotation. Pepe Le Pew was a French skunk, women loved his smelly ***** Marvin The Martian was from Mars, his laser gun would leave you with scars. Tweety was an antagonizing canary, lived with Granny, and flew like a crafty fairy. Sylvester was Granny's pet cat, him and Tweety always went *** for tat. Road Runner was so very fast, said beep beep as Wile E Coyote he passed. Never fell for those Acme supplies, getting blown up was his ultimate demise. Porky Pig was just happy to be included, the, the that's all folks, is how this will be concluded.
0
Oct 4, 2013
Oct 4, 2013 at 2:18 AM UTC
Loony Tunes
Magical cauldron apomixes connoisseur               Cephalic phantasmagoria entity obliquitous         Mystical conjurous conjugal entrepreneur                         Fantasia fantastication phantasm obsequious Amorously arduous ardent raconteur Ephemeral translucent opulence ubiquitous             Vanity sanctimonium temerities saboteur Intrepid verve’s intriguingly iniquitous Sorcerous sabbatness apothegms chauffeur Endemic veracities fortuitous elicitous Futurity fatidic's fornication kithe                         Ephemeral metaphor semantics flaunts Empirical emulation scenarios blithe Subjunctive subliminal nostalgias haunts Agile articulation acuities lithe                           Analogizing corroborative prolificacy daunts Alacritous tactile manipulations writhe Numinous syntactical paradigm *****                   Emanate imminent perdition tithe Orotund jaded seal ordinand jaunts                                                           ­                                         Overt convection coercions chiaroscuro tempestuous                                                   Ape­x crux axis ****** matrix torrid                         Manifest objectified enamorous interstice lecherous Spurt binge spree ***** protuberance squalid    endearingly engendering amore
0
Mar 30, 2017
Mar 30, 2017 at 7:59 PM UTC
Phalaxy
Magical cauldron apomixes connoisseur               Cephalic phantasmagoria entity obliquitous         Mystical conjurous conjugal entrepreneur                         Fantasia fantastication phantasm obsequious Amorously arduous ardent raconteur Ephemeral translucent opulence ubiquitous             Vanity sanctimonium temerities saboteur Intrepid verve’s intriguingly iniquitous Sorcerous sabbatness apothegms chauffeur Endemic veracities fortuitous elicitous Futurity fatidic's fornication kithe                         Ephemeral metaphor semantics flaunts Empirical emulation scenarios blithe Subjunctive subliminal nostalgias haunts Agile articulation acuities lithe                           Analogizing corroborative prolificacy daunts Alacritous tactile manipulations writhe Numinous syntactical paradigm *****                   Emanate imminent perdition tithe Orotund jaded seal ordinand jaunts                                                           ­                                         Overt convection coercions chiaroscuro tempestuous                                                   Ape­x crux axis ****** matrix torrid                         Manifest objectified enamorous interstice lecherous Spurt binge spree ***** protuberance squalid    endearingly engendering amore
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26
Number 7 in the ORLOK series and one of the best O how I relish the taste of blood ****** out from the devastated jugular But there is more, much more When the victim is a nubile **** From a Transylvanian village Where ****** morality Is quite ******* thin on the ground; And that is how I met my fate. 'Twas on an October eve When I met plump Esmeralda And (having fed my fill from her neck as she slept in her hut under filthy rags stinking of stale ***** I sank my fangs into her naked belly Ripping into her bloated guts With my accustomed gusto; My tongue slurping its way Over her twitching **** And finally I descended joyously To her odorous spunk-encrusted ***** For the last rites, Before the final curtain To her worthless life of peasantry. But then, as my excitement mounted, And just as I was on the verge Of pumping out my vampiric ******* I felt an agonising, mind-blasting pain As a major stroke swept through me, Wrecking my synapses big time, Turning my brain into guacamole. And now I am a crippled ****** Just a spasticated old vampire In my second-hand rusting wheelchair, Courtesy of Romanian Social Services, Drooling helplessly Into my swollen pissy crotch, Waiting for another enema, My sole remaining pleasure And a stimulus to my jaded prostate. But, hurrah! hurrah! new hope arrives: A miracle occurs as I read of The new wonder pill from SuperDrug Available only in private practise And guaranteed to rejuvenate the jaded Or your money back, no worries. Orlok will fly again to pursue The pleasures of the flesh And especially the botty-zone.
0
Jan 20, 2015
Jan 20, 2015 at 12:24 PM UTC
The Terrible Doom of the Great COUNT ORLOK
Number 7 in the ORLOK series and one of the best O how I relish the taste of blood ****** out from the devastated jugular But there is more, much more When the victim is a nubile **** From a Transylvanian village Where ****** morality Is quite ******* thin on the ground; And that is how I met my fate. 'Twas on an October eve When I met plump Esmeralda And (having fed my fill from her neck as she slept in her hut under filthy rags stinking of stale ***** I sank my fangs into her naked belly Ripping into her bloated guts With my accustomed gusto; My tongue slurping its way Over her twitching **** And finally I descended joyously To her odorous spunk-encrusted ***** For the last rites, Before the final curtain To her worthless life of peasantry. But then, as my excitement mounted, And just as I was on the verge Of pumping out my vampiric ******* I felt an agonising, mind-blasting pain As a major stroke swept through me, Wrecking my synapses big time, Turning my brain into guacamole. And now I am a crippled ****** Just a spasticated old vampire In my second-hand rusting wheelchair, Courtesy of Romanian Social Services, Drooling helplessly Into my swollen pissy crotch, Waiting for another enema, My sole remaining pleasure And a stimulus to my jaded prostate. But, hurrah! hurrah! new hope arrives: A miracle occurs as I read of The new wonder pill from SuperDrug Available only in private practise And guaranteed to rejuvenate the jaded Or your money back, no worries. Orlok will fly again to pursue The pleasures of the flesh And especially the botty-zone.
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49
I remember as if it were yesterday, You were helping me with math problems once again, We would sit there for hours, Sketching various triangles with one simple pen. I can never forget, The college-level words you asked me to spell, We both were in complete fascination and suspense, As far as I can tell. I recall you teaching me a bit of yiddish as well, "Yachna and fashlepta chlank," I annuciated so well, This was no prank. I remmeber beating you in shuffle board, But It still might have been a tie, Because you played exceptionally well, As good and sweet as pie. I will always remember, Our long walks in Greak Neck, Papa and Shari bonding, While watching the beautiful scenery from the deck. I remember you took me to the beach in Greak Neck, Where we surprised Bubbie with a large horseshoe crab, Bubbie was frozen will fear, And almost took a cab. The late night outdoor concerts, You used to take me to, I became really fond of the music, And the massive amount of ***** in you. Now I know this next line is going to seem quite strange, But I remember blowing the garage door open with all my might, Thinking that is how it's supposed to open, And proud of myself for shining bright. One of the best of times, Was when you took me to the golfing range, I swung the club multiple times missing the ball, Calling myself deranged. The days when we all went to ihop, And to piccolos for lunch, Everything was delectable, Thanks a bunch! We've been to the movies many times, Where we'd sometimes surprisingly cry, Bubbie would say, "Oh, my God look at Papa," But your reasons for crying were beautifully justified. Just the thought of me coming to visit you, Makes me form such a luminous smile, Because there is no other Papa like you, A Papa so outgoing, loving, and all the worth while.
0
Apr 23, 2013
Apr 23, 2013 at 8:54 PM UTC
Untitled
I remember as if it were yesterday, You were helping me with math problems once again, We would sit there for hours, Sketching various triangles with one simple pen. I can never forget, The college-level words you asked me to spell, We both were in complete fascination and suspense, As far as I can tell. I recall you teaching me a bit of yiddish as well, "Yachna and fashlepta chlank," I annuciated so well, This was no prank. I remmeber beating you in shuffle board, But It still might have been a tie, Because you played exceptionally well, As good and sweet as pie. I will always remember, Our long walks in Greak Neck, Papa and Shari bonding, While watching the beautiful scenery from the deck. I remember you took me to the beach in Greak Neck, Where we surprised Bubbie with a large horseshoe crab, Bubbie was frozen will fear, And almost took a cab. The late night outdoor concerts, You used to take me to, I became really fond of the music, And the massive amount of ***** in you. Now I know this next line is going to seem quite strange, But I remember blowing the garage door open with all my might, Thinking that is how it's supposed to open, And proud of myself for shining bright. One of the best of times, Was when you took me to the golfing range, I swung the club multiple times missing the ball, Calling myself deranged. The days when we all went to ihop, And to piccolos for lunch, Everything was delectable, Thanks a bunch! We've been to the movies many times, Where we'd sometimes surprisingly cry, Bubbie would say, "Oh, my God look at Papa," But your reasons for crying were beautifully justified. Just the thought of me coming to visit you, Makes me form such a luminous smile, Because there is no other Papa like you, A Papa so outgoing, loving, and all the worth while.
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48
So come everybody throw ya hands In the air for me If y'all feelin this jubilee O yea so lets get back to the actions Satisfaction Of celebrities got ya main attraction No actin I'm packing Gats to baseball bats and who dat? Call me poetry wack splat Goes through ya back bullet hole Filljn those Empty spots ya can't touc what's hot I got reps like birdie Above the rim lace blunt with traces Of v slims Who can stop me if my potency Is near infinite I'm embedded in ya melon eternally Too cool for y'all to see I be With this jubilee a juvenile Born in the wild never smiled as child All I wanted was a few toys from micky ds Could barely afford cheese Make tracks sneeze when I breath Got thick chicks from here all the way to Belize Please don't be ignorant Just throw ya hands up to this anthem Ya can't phantom The jubilee is slammin- Come on Not that the time is right Refocused my sight the black knight Knocking outsights now ya braille as **** for trynA **** with The m o b s t e r ghetto star All hands on the r Ruger luger quick to shoot ya scoop ya Out of the scene like ice cream One man team Don't need a **** near friend in need Please believe I got backups like traffic Hit the skins is automatic cuz static To radio station they hate me Cuz I don't participate in ******** I'm concerned with These ***** *** punks running politics Donald Trump I gotta automatic thAt loves to dump Throw his *** in the trunk Puff skunks I'm slammin on the gas Like an alley oopp dunk full of ***** Dikes to lesbians all want a piece of me I ain't cocky but stocky like Rocky Picket pock me ill find thee Restin peace to my enemies That couldn't get to me I'm hater proof so y'all just throw ya hands in the air for me And represent this jubilee ahh. Come on
0
Jun 15, 2016
Jun 15, 2016 at 12:01 PM UTC
Jubilee
So come everybody throw ya hands In the air for me If y'all feelin this jubilee O yea so lets get back to the actions Satisfaction Of celebrities got ya main attraction No actin I'm packing Gats to baseball bats and who dat? Call me poetry wack splat Goes through ya back bullet hole Filljn those Empty spots ya can't touc what's hot I got reps like birdie Above the rim lace blunt with traces Of v slims Who can stop me if my potency Is near infinite I'm embedded in ya melon eternally Too cool for y'all to see I be With this jubilee a juvenile Born in the wild never smiled as child All I wanted was a few toys from micky ds Could barely afford cheese Make tracks sneeze when I breath Got thick chicks from here all the way to Belize Please don't be ignorant Just throw ya hands up to this anthem Ya can't phantom The jubilee is slammin- Come on Not that the time is right Refocused my sight the black knight Knocking outsights now ya braille as **** for trynA **** with The m o b s t e r ghetto star All hands on the r Ruger luger quick to shoot ya scoop ya Out of the scene like ice cream One man team Don't need a **** near friend in need Please believe I got backups like traffic Hit the skins is automatic cuz static To radio station they hate me Cuz I don't participate in ******** I'm concerned with These ***** *** punks running politics Donald Trump I gotta automatic thAt loves to dump Throw his *** in the trunk Puff skunks I'm slammin on the gas Like an alley oopp dunk full of ***** Dikes to lesbians all want a piece of me I ain't cocky but stocky like Rocky Picket pock me ill find thee Restin peace to my enemies That couldn't get to me I'm hater proof so y'all just throw ya hands in the air for me And represent this jubilee ahh. Come on
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57
Adios England's Venus flytrap May you ever overflow inside our rectums You were the ornament that inserted itself Where spunks were pelted to pieces You ********** in the open air to our promontory And you squirted to those inside ******** Now you reciprocate to Abraham's ***** And the black holes crack spew out your barber's pole And it seems to me you tasted your ***** Like a cigarette lighter in the diarrhoea Never drooping with knobs on the cherry lips When the ooze congeal within And your smells will always regurgitate here Along England's juiciest blast—offs Your cigarette lighter's exploded spew out long before Your whiff ever go the whole hog Voluptuousness we've jiggled These frenzied wombs of time needing your clenched fist This lava lamp we'll always get pregnant For our breed's fair—haired brats And even though we have a finger in The clean breast seduces us to moistness All our foghorns cannot **** The ecstasy you stimulated us throughout the age groups
0
Apr 2, 2010
Apr 2, 2010 at 3:21 PM UTC
Cigarette Lighter In The Diarrhoea 1997
To the cutest girl    Amongst all the lunks Purple, white and black as the sky    (As you know) Hard work and a trusty Honda    Such things will get you anywhere in life    Be it an outcome which requires this    Such slender ***** Enjoy your night!
0
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 1:04 AM UTC
Honda Girl (HGS)
Lots of ladies there may be, but I haven't had that many My **** is always active, and I think I would have any In the past I could have been, just a bit too picky The art of wanking I did try, but that left my pants all sticky Some nice **** I would love, or an **** or three The fairer *** is preferable, cos there's nothing strange about me It really doesn't seem that fare, when there are many slags And lots of ugly fat ****** that say they all want shags But I can not locate any, I wish there was a way That I could find a nice gal, and not someone that is gay Nothing against the Lezzers, I'm just not that way inclined But I'm fed up with wanking, and I don't want to go blind I would ***** an old gal, with a big fat rounded **** A squeezable amount of flesh, inside an **** **** Big fat ****** are welcome, who want it up their bucket I would like **** your **** and I'd really love to **** it An **** I could really try, if only the girls would ******* lots of ***** ***** that could be quite good A large obese girl I would **** with lots of rolls of fat I'd stuff my **** inside there **** cos there's nothing wrong with that Ideal worlds would be good, if you could **** the girls you like But I will settle for a ***** or a well used ridden bike Even in a ******** they could be a real good **** If pussy's are full of ***** I'd still **** your *** filled bag Maybe I could find an old gal who is a real life ***** I would just think so what, and **** her well used ***** After I have loosened up, her tight old ******* hole I could have a tighter **** with her **** upon my pole ******** the ladies ******** this is always such a dream Arses will be filled up, and the cat would get the cream If you want to get ****** and you find any of this thrilling Get your ***** and arseholes out, ready for a creamy filling Come on all you fat slags, I'd like to see you naked And even you wrinkly old bags, to me nothing is sacred Your ***** cats are required, and your arses are inclined Fat slags and old bags are still quite hard to find
0
Feb 5, 2016
Feb 5, 2016 at 12:29 PM UTC
Fat Slags And Old Bags - 2018 (Extended & Enhanced)
Lots of ladies there may be, but I haven't had that many My **** is always active, and I think I would have any In the past I could have been, just a bit too picky The art of wanking I did try, but that left my pants all sticky Some nice **** I would love, or an **** or three The fairer *** is preferable, cos there's nothing strange about me It really doesn't seem that fare, when there are many slags And lots of ugly fat ****** that say they all want shags But I can not locate any, I wish there was a way That I could find a nice gal, and not someone that is gay Nothing against the Lezzers, I'm just not that way inclined But I'm fed up with wanking, and I don't want to go blind I would ***** an old gal, with a big fat rounded **** A squeezable amount of flesh, inside an **** **** Big fat ****** are welcome, who want it up their bucket I would like **** your **** and I'd really love to **** it An **** I could really try, if only the girls would ******* lots of ***** ***** that could be quite good A large obese girl I would **** with lots of rolls of fat I'd stuff my **** inside there **** cos there's nothing wrong with that Ideal worlds would be good, if you could **** the girls you like But I will settle for a ***** or a well used ridden bike Even in a ******** they could be a real good **** If pussy's are full of ***** I'd still **** your *** filled bag Maybe I could find an old gal who is a real life ***** I would just think so what, and **** her well used ***** After I have loosened up, her tight old ******* hole I could have a tighter **** with her **** upon my pole ******** the ladies ******** this is always such a dream Arses will be filled up, and the cat would get the cream If you want to get ****** and you find any of this thrilling Get your ***** and arseholes out, ready for a creamy filling Come on all you fat slags, I'd like to see you naked And even you wrinkly old bags, to me nothing is sacred Your ***** cats are required, and your arses are inclined Fat slags and old bags are still quite hard to find
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36
My perfect princess Loves to dance and dress My princess perfect Causes no distress Sings just for affect Angel in my heart Lover of all art A painter, writer My princess my **** A demure fighter The ***** in spunky The funk in funky The warmth in my soul Happiness ***** Perfect daughter role Strait "As" in her school No boy's Blonde haired fool Boy terminator Dependence too cruel An animator My perfect princess Loves to dance and dress My princess perfect Causes no distress Can't know her affect
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Dec 30, 2012
Dec 30, 2012 at 7:08 PM UTC
Princess Perfect
'Brussels sprouts'... The only healthy addition on a plate of Christmas dinner, because even the carrots are tempered in butter, but I never serve myself any, 'cause I couldn't give a **** about being healthy. At one point I was eating roast potato with mashed potato and everything else was covered in gravy, so... I'm a very bad girl who avoid what's good. I stay up real late and snack on junk food. On night outs I drink to get drunk, mixing all the spirits to heighten my ***** Liver abused, dressed to ****** dancing like a stripper on the Vegas strip, grinding, shaking, dropping, moving, all hard to resist. Then there's the social smoking, and a few smoked alone. Hush, about the latter. No one needs to know. All the Friday nights, the strange men, in my bed. What am I looking for? 'Cause it's sure as hell ain't *** Boycotting church for the past few weeks, but my mom doesn't know so don't let it leak that I'm a bad girl, that I've changed, that I'm lost, that in trying to find myself, the soul was the ultimate cost. That naive, innocent girl who ran into the world with open arms, appears to have misplaced that certain charm. She stares back through the mirror eyes clouded with pain, because each time I tried to stand up society struck again. So, I'm a very bad girl. Really very bad. I spend my time wrestling guilt, and it drives me mad.
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Dec 9, 2012
Dec 9, 2012 at 2:17 PM UTC
Bad girl
I spoke to a friend today She asked how was life in my world Topics a many were discussed and disected Failures and love and feeling dejected Does it all come down to to just one thing? A few inches of flesh and some physical thing It's a lottery finding the one who fits And not just in the place where the G spot sits Goldilocks only had a choice of three ? For us it's many and a lottery Small , tall round or plump Does it all come down to delivering *****
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Jun 7, 2015
Jun 7, 2015 at 3:50 PM UTC
The F###ing lottery