"facetiming" poems
i hate how we can’t ******* hang out without people looking at their **** phones
{except i check mine too}
i hate how technology has the audacity to imitate physical presence by this ******** FaceTiming
{except i wish i had an iPhone}
i hate how relationships take place on the ******* phone
{except if i had a relation, i would do the same}
i hate how we type how we feel instead of just saying it
{except i find it easier to see it in text than to say it in speech}
i hate how we spend time on the computer instead of taking a ******* walk
{except i spend all day on the computer}
i hate this new ******* technologically advanced generation
{except i'm a part of it}
May 3, 2014
May 3, 2014 at 9:35 PM UTC
So many things going on in one house.
On one side,
here I am crying over
an invisible broken heart.
On the other side,
there is my sister happily in love,
facetiming with her soon to be fiance.
Then on different floors,
there is my parents.
Once madly in love,
now they don't even sleep in the same bed.
My dad is downstairs because he snores.
My mom is upstairs with earplugs in.
Its crazy how many stories are under one roof.
Nov 22, 2014
Nov 22, 2014 at 5:56 AM UTC
I’m FaceTiming with my Grandmère, we touch-base once a week. I love that face, wrinkled, like wind-weathered driftwood, and she’s a wag.
“Are you familiar with the ECB?” She asks.
I wince at this odd turn in conversation, “Not REALLY,” I say, searching my mental index of useless facts and cross-matching those with her interests, “the European Central Bank?” I reply. “Oui.” she says.
“Let’s see,” I begin in a bored voice, “Inflation – transitory or persistent?” I say, in my best TV news-reader voice. “No,” I chuckle, “Not really, I have REAL, boring-things I’m learning about.”
“You’ll need to - one day,” she says, like a tarot reading oracle.
“I can’t imagine why.” I said.
“I’m writing a few sentences about you!” I interject, to both change the subject and see what she says. She’s the only one in the family who knows I write.
“Oh,” she sighs, “Am I young, immoral and reckless?”
“Yes, you ARE,” I assure her, “you’re the worst.”
“Good," she confides, “I miss those days.”
Jul 30, 2022
Jul 30, 2022 at 12:23 PM UTC
I never really knew you,
you were just another friend,
when I got to know you,
I let my heart unwind.
After all the time we spent to get to know each other,
the texting, the facetiming,
we finally joined one day,
now both, happier than before.
So I have fallen deeply in love with you,
I'll never let you go,
my feelings for you are will never change,
my feelings are the truest they've ever been,
just remember this I will always love you.
Jan 10, 2016
Jan 10, 2016 at 5:36 PM UTC
I'm still sitting here but this time I'm able to write I can say things that don't invoke emotion or lack of it. I can keep a decent convo and i am saying things that are well thought out and meaningful (I think), yet I can't get over the overwhelming cloud of depression hanging over my head. This is all I've wanted to happen for the past month+ yet I feel like it's wrong like it's some kind of weird taboo, we're FaceTiming now, I'm rambling this is bad. **** me. **** me to the lowest circle of hell. I think I'm going to write a lot tonight.
Jul 30, 2014
Jul 30, 2014 at 1:16 AM UTC
It's 2 in the morning.
You're lying in bed, on FaceTime with a man named John.
He was released from prison two weeks ago.
In a month, he'll be in rehab again.
But you don't know that yet.
The screen freezes as you get a call from me.
You ask him to wait as you let my call ring, ignored.
He knows I exist.
I have no clue he exists.
As far as I know, you're asleep.
Meanwhile, I'm sitting at the edge of my bed, 3,000 miles away.
I've just received the news that my cousin is dead.
I'm sobbing, trying to get a hold of you somehow.
Desperate to have someone I can talk to about this,
But you're the only one.
The call stops ringing, and you go back to FaceTiming him.
You prop your phone up on a pillow and let him watch you take your shirt off.
No bra underneath.
You show him how well you can ********** the toy I bought you.
You twist around and show him your naked *** the ********
The two of you ********** together.
I interrupt unknowingly every fifteen minutes, needing you.
You swipe my calls away and do what he asks you to do.
You both *** then talk for hours.
I sob at the edge of my bed, begging you to answer in another voicemail.
Jul 19, 2019
Jul 19, 2019 at 2:28 AM UTC
I met this girl.
She’s far from perfect but I love her.
I’m far from perfect but she loves me.
We’re really happy.
We never fought about a thing.
I'm really happy.
We’re planning for after college.
We spend our time apart FaceTiming.
I'm nervous.
September goes by.
October goes by.
November goes by.
January comes.
I lost my virginity.
We love each other more every day.
February goes by.
We fight about college.
We fight about loyalty.
We fight about faith.
We make up.
March comes.
We fight.
And fight.
And fight.
I start to doubt.
Why does this have to happen to me.
We're sad.
She won't text me.
She's mad.
I can't sleep.
April comes.
We fight.
April goes by.
Everyday feels like a lie.
I forget who she is.
I forget what we had.
I don’t know whats real from fiction anymore.
Everything is fiction.
I’m lost.
I miss January.
Found love at the end of senior year.
We planned a life together.
We're going to separate colleges.
Now I’m doubting everything.
I feel like she’s lying to me all the time.
Everyone is out to get me.
I don’t think she ever loved me.
But we were so perfect.
It doesn’t make any sense to me.
We were set.
Thoughts of college worries me.
Separation worries me.
Being alone again worries me.
Started worrying about her loyalty.
I just want to die.
I feel like everyone is out to get me.
Nothing is real anymore.
There is no god.
I’m scaring myself.
Yet I’m comfortable.
What was that scar about.
She looks at me different.
Who does she text.
Who does she love.
Who am I anymore.
I was never like this.
It was never about pity.
Everyone is out to get me.
I can’t hear anymore.
I can’t see.
I’m growing more blind and deaf everyday.
Mentally and literally.
Music blasts in my eardrums.
I need another surgery.
Who does she love.
Music makes me feel sane.
Who loves me?
I want to die.
My identity is compromised.
May 15, 2016
May 15, 2016 at 7:22 PM UTC
full stomach, aching chest
i try again to push my fingers through the screen of my phone
(i just want to brush my fingertips against yours while we call)
i am full of desire
for conflict = love vs. lust, joy vs. death
meaning
i'm not quite sure what i want some nights,
but i always want to be next to you
love poems make me nauseous sometimes, looking back at all the past ones i wrote thinking the feeling might last
but naively, perhaps, i'll say that you feel very different
i'm not afraid either way...
(okay. afraid of losing you, too)
Mar 21, 2018
Mar 21, 2018 at 2:41 AM UTC
A Note From Exile
I cannot go home.
Rather I cannot go where my family lives - that place ceased to be home some time ago.
I was a soldier during the Cold War and my neighbors there have become more like East German loyalists than American citizens.
They surrender their rights without question
They are eager to call out community members on social media for ‘social distancing violations’.
They use shame and ridicule to control others
They applaud the police for keeping children from playing in gigantic public parks
They trust politicians who ignore public defecation and drug use to look out for ’the public good'
They allow themselves to be labeled ‘essential’ and ’non-essential’
They carry ’traveling papers’ in the event that they are stopped by the police
They propagate the most inflammatory statistics without ever validating their veracity.
Because…
They heard it on CNN.
So I will remain 1098 miles away
Zooming
Skyping
Facetiming
Until the contagion subsides
And then I’ll return
To a completely different world.
Apr 14, 2020
Apr 14, 2020 at 12:21 AM UTC
Who knew
a little social-distancing hangout
low-battery-mode FaceTiming
Snickers on a fishing rod
purple-like-my-hair haiku
and some birthday s'mores
could make me feel
so loved?
Apr 17, 2020
Apr 17, 2020 at 7:03 PM UTC
he told me he loved me by accident, or so it seemed.
we were laughing together like any normal night
and we were facetiming to talk about his car and
how much we missed each other.
and as we were laughing, i realized he stopped.
i found him staring at me and him slowly forming the phrase,
"I love you, Rachel."
he didn't come out of his daze for awhile,
and he seemed quite surprised that he had said it.
he sort of nodded and smiled, as if he was assuring himself that
he meant what he said when he told me that he loved me.
i just remember looking at him,
looking at my glass screen wishing i could touch him on the cheek
or even hold his hand, just so he could know that
i feel the same too.
i'm sorry that words don't seem to be enough to show my love for you.
i just know that I've been told that phrase enough without actually feeling the love that is supposed to be radiated between two people when they say it.
i just know that i never want it happen again, and with you it hopefully never will.
so, when you said you loved me, you said you meant it.
you said that our silly banter and my laugh and the way i breathe while i read made you fall for me.
you said you didn't mean to, it just sort of....happened.
but more importantly, you said something that i had never told you that i feared.
*"I won't leave you. I can tell that you're scared, because they all leave you. Rachel...I don't want to be like them, I'm different. I love you, and I need you to know that you're loved. I swear I won't leave you, I swear it."*
my heart wants to believe him, and my body craves to tell him that I love him too...
but my mind? well,
it's having a hard time letting me believe that
someone can love someone as
heartless as me.
Jun 11, 2015
Jun 11, 2015 at 9:30 AM UTC
I cannot go home.
Rather I cannot go where my family lives - that place ceased to be home some time ago.
I was a soldier during the Cold War and my neighbors there have become more like East German loyalists than American citizens.
They surrender their rights without question
They are eager to call out community members on social media for ‘social distancing violations’.
They use shame and ridicule to control others
They applaud the police for keeping children from playing in gigantic public parks
They trust politicians who ignore public defecation and drug use to look out for ’the public good'
They allow themselves to be labeled ‘essential’ and ’non-essential’
They carry ’traveling papers’ in the event that they are stopped by the police
They propagate the most inflammatory statistics without ever validating their veracity.
Because…
They heard it on CNN.
So I will remain 1098 miles away
Zooming
Skyping
Facetiming
Until the contagion subsides
And then I’ll return
To a completely different world.
Dec 24, 2021
Dec 24, 2021 at 8:58 AM UTC