goodnight dark world, filled with rejection and hate
only using my deep emotional turmoil as bait
falling asleep is giving in they say
but I can't stand another moment of this day
fueling the fire of thoughts that devour my mind
looking for answers that I will never find
I should just give up and let the world destroy my heart
take it's cold deceptive hands and rip me apart.

I have to try and keep my chin up and my head held high, among people that only want to rip me down.
I'm nothing but a side show in their pathetic lives
Please return to your seats the show is about to begin.
And they all lean forward with their eyes on the prize
Their deviance is no longer in disguise.
Looks like friendship, but is only lies to keep themselves entertained for awhile.
Pull at the dangling veins where my heart used to be,
Please stop pulling, I'm begging you, set me free.
For your own entertainment
For your own joy
I am not just some disposable toy.
I've never been more hurt than the pain I feel now
While you eat your own ****, I've taken my head out of the clouds.
You can **** with me all you want, but nothing is going to change.
I've got rage like a lion, and I'm looking for prey.
I won't even eat your body, I want to watch it decay.
My anger isn't centered, it's in different directions
**** all you mother ******* and your misconceptions.
I'm tired of this, you can go eat ****.
Because when I find you, next thing is your dead body in a ditch.
**** your rumors, **** your lies
You're all enemies in disguise.
Giving nothing, Wanting all
I can't wait to watch you fall
Into the darkness, just like me
Oh, wont you keep me company?
Your brown nose tells me yes
So you like when I'm a mess?
Sadistic mother *******, all of you are guilty.
Stop looking at my hands when yours are ******* filthy.
I'm done with these death games you play
You can have each other, I'm not going to stay.

Screaming at the top of my lungs,
Screaming for help but nobody comes.
Throwing up my insides, covered in blood
Drowning in my shame, consumed by the flood

Into the darkness, my soul is devoured
Taking my own life, some call me a coward
The pain is too great, the shame is too real
I’m tired of emotions, I don’t want to feel.

Destroyed are my walls of protection,
Vulnerable and open in all directions
Stab at me with your knives
Watch me suffer, scream in pain and die.

I’ll never be good enough, I’ll never be right,
I deserve to suffer every single night.
I can’t be strong anymore, I’ve lost the fight.
And tonight is the night when I take my life.

I’ll love you forever no matter the case
Your trust and forgiveness is what I chase.
Shame and disgust is all I feel
Without you around makes it all so real.
I know you’re not gone, at least not forever
But I can’t stand the reality that we aren’t together.

My tears and apologies make no difference
The only thing keeping me away from you is the distance.
I just want to see you
And hold you close to my heart
But I know that will never happen because we are apart.

I wish that I could comfort you like you did for me
Standing close to my side and refusing to leave.
I took this all for granted, I had what everyone wants
My shame and hatred for myself haunts,
Every crevice of my life, every moment of the day
I’m sorry I wrote this for you, I’ll go away.