I awoke to a morning of such brief beauties,
How strange these new realities are,
I'm somewhat scared but would like to claim the euphoria,
On a daily basis I'm now leaving my own mind ajar.

It's a risk and I have been delving deeper by the day,
I never knew my own consciousness could be so foreign,
I've been introspecting since my youth but found new territory today,
There is a prospect that is positive or perhaps it is peril, when you cross the mind's old imperious margin.

Within nature's grand duality,
That living love does now reside,
Our vast landscape of frozen uncertainty,
Is no safe place for that love to hide.


So dimly now do its embers glow,
I must confess, I'm scared,
So beautiful though it is to know,
That troubled stream who keeps the source unshared.


Dearest of souls and darkest of depths,
A mind I'm afraid to know better,
But their absence deems my brain cells bereft,
If I were simple, I'd write them a letter.

Let us momentarily untangle these social knots,
Let us be the rain in this dangerous drought of dreams,
We are better than those garish gambling slots,
We cannot see life's light in their spurious sunbeams.

You sang for us all so sweetly, though many had blocked their ears,
Your song was enough to ease my mind of mundanity and steal away my eyes from tears,
You unburdened my heart of the day's ordinary harm and your melody made moribund my fears,
But passers by missed the music, how could they not hear the song I'll remember for years?

You selflessly sang your colours into the grey and toiling afternoon,
All day I heard the steady and beige tick-tock until you sang out your rainbow and joyous bloom,
So filled to the brim was my stomach with gratitude when my weary mind awoke to your vital tune,
You asked wonder to tear up my contract with banality, I hope I hear you again sometime soon.

The hours sprint by as though their only motive is to win cruelty's race,
I reside on my knees, in time's clutch of agony, always despairing at its pernicious pace,
Too fast, too soon does pain come to call at my ever-polite brain,
And my mind, once again, is the awkward host to the unwelcome guest, the uninvited disdain.

Here it is again, the frustrating refrain that permeates my days like the waves upon sand,
As fluid as those waves is my tired brain, yet parched remains my lonely hand,
With all I can muster, I shout at that shadow and beg that it would dissolve into the common darkness,
But despite all my efforts, that shadow returns to stifle my catharsis.

I don't pretend that better days won't come to visit me sometimes,
But I can't deny that without that shadow I would struggle to know life's rhymes,
And perhaps this is the price for a living soul to indulge in that which is real and true,
I won't run, I won't cower, and even if it means hurt, I will look you in the eye and I will see your value.

Sporadically, I miss you,
Always, I need you,
My great comfort of the past, destroyed,
A snow soul turned to coal, no longer a soul, just a void.

Awake and therefore hating,
Everything but creating,
Made in the image and likeness,
Of this great chaos and detritus.

Your religion did debase my very nature,
It made moribund my might and lukewarm my temperature,
The thief in the night robbed me of hope by adumbrating that eschatological night,
And fate struck a deal with tyrannical tedium to dilute my delight.

Secret and senile condition,
It obeys that old self-righteous act of contrition,
Tentative and taciturn me,
Longing only for my fleeting thoughts to be free.

Obscure and opulent friend,
You remind me of life and a journey's end,
Wonderful and whimsical you,
You're the best I have known, the best shade of blue.

Unknown and unarmed us,
How could it be that we are walking thus?
Crippled and unstable we,
Blessed be the path that did heed our pace's plea.

Loneliness, you, the great misunderstood privilege,
You, oh terrible and gut-wrenching luxury,
To face that expansive, internal abyss,
And to know myself, wholly,
In deepest despair and boldest bliss.

Slow motion memory, you intricate skill,
Towering and dangerous like waves of wine's sea,
Decanting your motion and learning to savour,
Sweet moments of wonder, drunken and divine,
Show me myself in my buried behaviour.