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Sally A Bayan Apr 2016
Remembering, when...
occasions, weekends were eagerly celebrated
even weekdays...any day was met with enthusiasm
but, how did all these special days become so ordinary?
how...why, did these red-marked dates become unimportant?

why are we here now, in this phase? at this point?
existing...standing on a plateau...where,
life offers no changes...no alternatives...
it's like...a storm decides to stop at midstream
chooses to stay...not just passing through
no swerving, no immediate changes in its direction.

the adventurous soul in us, hides...its spark, dies
sunlight looks dim...the moon is without a glow
clear sea water seems muddy...wading, becomes
so tiresome...legs and feet hurt so much,
from swimming...day by day
...away...from cacophony...

it gets to be weary,
to be reminded of a wrong choice,
or a wrong decision made,
to always rise...from a restless sea
most times, we taste impure water
contaminated...and adulterated
where acerbic, detrimental  words float,
further aggravating
existing emotional sores,
creating more lesions in the mind.
what's worse,
the ears that choose to be deaf, are further pierced
the already wounded heart and dashed ego, are further stabbed    
they all could one day, be numbed
.......by more of these ordinary days....

I wonder if it's better...to linger on a plateau
or to be on the cusp...of a fall...


Sally


Copyright April 17, 2016
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
Jack Ghaven Feb 2016
I genuinely hate this situation
I put myself in isolation
To honestly see what I am to everyone
As I thought before I am no one
Days of silence could turn to weeks
Yet no so called "friend" speaks
I am lost within my own contradictions
As were my initial predictions
So here I sit ****** up off something
Knowing all I'll ever be is nothing
I can barely see what I'm writing
With my blurry vision and this dim lighting
But it'll all be over soon I hope
I'm so far past trying to cope
The title is honestly inspired by A Day To Remember and the content is straight from the past few days of my refusal to reach out to anyone who doesn't reach out to me first.
Thomas Maltuin Oct 2015
A water drop fallen down
to vast dark pools to drown

A dead brown leaf staying put
crumpled smashed underfoot

No wind to carry you away
stagnant broken here you'll stay

Blending in your world surrounds
passing by in leaps and bounds

Quivering shaking trembling not
overlooking your trivial lot

Blues so vibrant reds so pure
crying bleeding heart so sore

soul refusing brittle tempering
broken omitted needs remembering

tiny teardrop fallen down
vast dark oceans made to drown
Nothing matters today
I keep breathing
The world keeps spinning
Someone somewhere is dying
Half a bottle in
With a stomach fulls of pills
Bleeding wrists
And tired eyes
Nothing matters today
Tomorrow nothing will change
Tears will be shed
Over the lives lost yesterday
Which seems to be today
Curious how that works
Nothing matters today
Nothing will matter tomorrow
Because in the end,
Nothing really matters

*The Suicide Diaries
Takhallus Sha'er May 2015
As if bound
and chained
to a rock
in the middle
of a vast, hot
desert,
I wait;
Praying for
a salvation
which might
come eventually...
*...Maybe.
Inspired...
PrttyBrd Mar 2015
Fear
Judged by irrationality
Hidden in accidental oversights
Feeding the dragon that leaks molten lava in salty streaks of regret
Fear
Empty wasted emotion
Saving ourselves from ourselves
Saving you from me
Worst case scenarios never included you punishing me at the sight of my weakness
Fear
You only love me beautiful
Love is a profound type of collective psychosis
Looks like strength but hides the truth
The truth that certainty is the truest delusion
Fear
On my best day, in the best possible scenario, I am still invisible
Open and still transparent
Full and still forgotten
Insightful and irrelevant my thoughts pour out unheard
Fear
In my demon's shadows lives the truth of my vulnerability
I am weak because I love you
I am a warrior because you love me
I am strong because I love you
I am a lamb because you love me
Fear
Spilling my unseen secrets
My evil self-talk, my mantra of honest lies
The purr of a kitten unsettles a soul beginning to believe it mattered
Pain dismissed in the peaceful snores of a tired moon
Fear
The sun shines in hope on the remnants of dream
On the nightmare of forgotten, overlooked, inconsequential truth
Empty apologies and the familiarity of beloved anguish
Herald the realization, that words don't matter
Truth or lies, faithless faithful, and a newfound silence
Fear
Invisible save for the ash lines that tell the tale
Of how I begged forgiveness for sharing my tormented and twisted mind
Only to be interrupted by the sounds of your peaceful slumber
Fear**
To be everything to your everything
and realize I am still........nothing at all
31115
To Him, poetic license, I know I am your sun.  I know who you are. But sometimes..."because we love, we hurt."
Andrea Jan 2015
nothing more, so much less.
the 18th year, to the date
is approaching.
I cannot bear the thought of myself
as anything more than a being.
I have accomplished nothing,
and lack the desire to do.
the 18th year and I am still
nothing.
svdgrl Jan 2015
Energy to try is depleted.
I wonder if you'd even see this.
Not that I have problem telling you
how I feel-
but if you were wondering what it's like
to feel like I do...
who am I kidding?
You'll never even look at this.
You're not a stranger, and I almost wish you were-
so the fact that you don't check this regularly
didn't make me feel so insignificant.
And if you did check,
you'd see I'm making you famous
but you never needed help,
so I guess it doesn't matter.
No wonder you never look.
You were
      One
I was
         two
Now I'm the
         *third
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