Patience leads & boredom breads into the waiting game
My mind it ponders, lightly wonders out of view from the
Ineffectual teachings, impotent reaching trying to move toward me
I'm faking writing, simply minding words that have no meaning

Patiently, violently, waiting here silently
watching the clock tick slower than ever
Patiently, violently, waiting here silently
watching the clock tick slower than ever

Lights exceed, these words they breath but I couldn't care less if they're dead
Time it slows, colliding with the, the words that jump over my head
I'm gradually sleeping, unconsciously leaping away from the struggles that be
My mind is in clarity, dreaming my heresy, hoping to leave & to leave

Patiently, violently, waiting here silently
watching the clock tick slower than ever
Patiently, violently, waiting here silently
watching the clock tick slower than ever

If I had to compare you to anything at all,
Really, Oxygen would be my first call.
They say it makes us sure and carefree,
Yet it heats the body and calms it too.
So if I had to pick a thing for you to be,
I imagine you are my own O two.

Here’s how my mind fathoms you in its roll,
Here’s how I think you take your toll.
I need you and You need me,
I use you to hear, understand, see.
When you are near I concur to happiness,
When too close I edge towards madness,
More often than not it comes to the latter,
But in short, to me, you matter.

So you see,  I need you in any possible way,
Like O two, you captivate me every second of the day,
When you are gone I shake with yearning,
When you are near my heart is burning.
Therefore, should you ever have a doubt,
Know that without you,
                               I would not hold out.

You medicate my mind, but inside I know I'm dying by your hand alone; yet, my body cries out for more. The high is unlike anything the world could otherwise have shown me, lifting the world off my shoulders. Alas, Atlas, at least you got to breathe the breathe of a Goddess. Green dress, and red hair, so ******* gorgeous, her essence seeping into my stream of Being. My hearts racing, my thoughts, tracing the outline of space and time, encasing Your face in form, accepting my fate and yearning for more... As you gently lay me down, back to dirt, my mind is clouded and my eyes are purple, and I recall a journey, but my memory is hazy, and I'm so tired... To sleep now, and dream of your touch, is all I desire, for tomorrow comes with no mercy, and I must continue on my own... until you call my name, again.

From the depths of my pain,
you have shown me that beautiful flowers
grow in the midst
of the cosmic chaos I was in.

You were the twinkling spark,
the light in the shadows of my sadness,
the encouraging voice that metamorphose
my black and white world into something kaleidoscopic.

You sifted the specks of dust
that revealed the darkest secrets I hid.
You were the sun that illuminated
during the twilight of my incoherent thoughts.

I was composed of the ephemera of depression,
the hushed air between my teeth
when my lips were sealed.
I remember the time you told me,

things will get better.
I sighed and responded,
I don’t think so.
I thought you were going to give up

for I was stroppy, cumbersome teenager
but instead, you smiled;
you morphed my cynical perspective
into a superlative of optimism.

Every time my voice trembled
with the curse of anxiety,
your words nursed my soul
casting me with courage.

Your words I kept,
in hollow crystallised bottles,
like encapsulated messages of importance.
Spilled thoughts were the reminiscent

of my favourite brisk days with you,
filling the fragments of my loneliness.
I seem to be on the sentence
of the last paragraph where you wrote:

things will get better.
written in the crisps pages
of my sad blues chapter,
dipped in ink;

I believe and trust you wholly,
because things do become better, no matter what.
You were always there for me,
if only you knew how much that meant to me.

Two pills to greet the morning
To wake up from the night before
Before the morning's over
There'll be at least four pills more
Her children never see this
Mother keeps her secret well
But, just in case she slips up
Father makes sure he, too. doesn't tell
Yes, Mummy is a pill freak
A suburban ****** in our midst
It's more common than you realize
I've names here to make a list
By ten she's popped two more pills
The kids are safely off at school
What the parents do not notice
Is that the children are not fooled
More pills again at lunch time
Then it's off for tennis at the club
Two more pills when she is finished
Just before her tan and rub
You see, Mummy is an addict
She eats pills like most eat cake
She's a really super actress
Miss one pill and she might break
Two years ago she had a problem
She was drinking, never touched a pill
Then she went to "camp" to dry out
that's where she found her brand new thrill
Daddy, he keeps her secret
lets her fool the PTA
You see, Daddy is her doctor
He makes sure that she's ok
The kids are home before mum
She's popped two to mellow out
She's the only mum their friends say
No ones ever heard her shout
Once the pills wear off, what is next
What addiction shall she feed?
She's tried ***** and now narcotics
What will help her fuel her need?
Daddy's mummy's little helper
Keeps her secret and his too
You see daddy has his own diversion
And she's only twenty two!!!

Thomas, Tommy baby,
you are both hot,
and sweet.

Tom Cat you’re red hot--
when I catch you in your Tom Cat Strut,
sauntering across campus,
strolling like it ain’t no thing,

cuz it don’t meant a thing
if it ain’t got that swing baby.

So dig this, Tommy Gun,
you groove with the best of ‘em
when I spot you strollin’—

Your head, teetering left and right like a seesaw, boppin’ baby,
arms hangin’ loosely, swinging freely, wildly, go! go!
legs scooping forward in boisterous trombone slides--
Groooooove Tommy baby!

You’re Louis’s best blows--
ten feet from the mic and the Fives baby,
you’re hot, red hot,
any closer and I'll burn up!
Go!

But you’re cool, real cool,
and oh so sweet.
Super sweet--

in your beard like a pepper and salt shaker tossed across the table,
I look to see those rosy lips part,
and peep those pearly whites shinin' like the bell of Louis’s cornet
brandished in the air, under those ballroom lights--
you’re screamin’ Tommy!

Let me hear that laugh that shakes the room,
punches like Blakey’s bass drum,
thumps like Mingus--

T-Bird you’ve got that hard bop in your soul,
you’re gonna bop to the top TB,
into the third heaven where the angels fall in line to your swing,
that incessant strut that keeps the devil at bay,
Blow! Blow! Blow!

And I see you now Tom Cat,
up there in the clouds,
digging your way across eternity,
bopping and jiving, swinging and blowing,

in your faded khaki pants and worn tennis shoes,
loosely buttoned collared shirt,
tight rectangular glasses that glistened the bell of your eyes even more--
I gotta stand twenty feet away Tommy baby!

You glance down at me and wink,
rearing your head back to let loose that Mingus and Blakey
bottom-end laugh,
guffaw guffaw guffaw!!!

--so hearty and rich,
the backbone of every nervous first-year classroom,
and the sniggering seniors you continued to befuddle and dazzle
with your mysterious ways
and insatiable swing.

So blow, Tommy Gun, blow!
Go Tom Cat go!
Dig T-Bird dig!
Let loose Tommy boy!

Swing for us, swing swing swing--
Hot and Sweet, Tommy baby,
hot and sweet.