Forgiveness,
I killed a planet today
Not really
Pinky
Promise

Little, persistent reminders of self-doubt
Red lines across the inside of the cheek,
a reminder of every time I haven’t known the right answer

your tongue is acidic

you enjoy the slow burn

and suddenly i don’t know if I’m going to the right college
/bite/
and suddenly i don’t know who i’m *******
/bite/
and suddenly i don’t know what I am anymore
/bite/

your teeth, my cheek

Am I not good enough?
No, Darling, You’re too much.
Oregon skies, Light of my life,
I’ll be a good baby.
I swear this time.
Don’t hate me, Alright?
I do enough for both us two.

Lately I've felt held back by a lot of constraints.
Burdens on my mind that I can't contain.
I want to express myself through words but it's getting difficult.
Because, frankly, **** rhyming, and **** watching my language.
**** all this depression and being hypocritical.
**** those lines I just wrote and **** how I feel about this poem.
**** how I came into this wanting to be reflective and negative.
**** it, in the words of my mother, "**** it all".
Just try to have a good time with your life before it's all gone.
It can be pretty ******* hard, but it's worth it.
Whenever life confronts you with obstructions, get the **** over it.
It's YOUR life, YOUR decisions, and YOUR results.
When you waste time on the things that don't matter, you've wasted too much.
So the next time something is irking you that doesn't really matter,
or you're not feeling well enough to  be positive,
do me a favor and think to yourself "**** it".
This is all we've got.
Don't waste it.
**** the small things, be happy.

If
One
More
Person
Tells
Me
To
"Stay Strong"

*I'MGONNAFUCKINGTHROWSOMETHINGLARGEANDHEAVY

I am just so ******* tired
to finally be awake

© Matthew Harlovic

I will never write about you again,
I swear to myself...


F.Z.N