You think you are the sun divine
I look at you and you multiply
I’m hungry but I can’t eat
Give me those eyes will you

My best friend, I was so afraid
Lay beside you, your body like a warm sandy beach
My body like washed up **** trying to get free

I was looking for salvation in the rock pools
Little snails and ***** would cling and pick at me
Til I finally gave in
You turned me evergreen

How long til the moon pulls you away
Leaves me to rest again, dehydrates me into a skeleton serene
How long til your silky arms stretch out again
And tickle me into an object of a lust, desires obscene

I feel you close
Like echoes in a tunnel seeming to whisper in your ear
But you’ve a long way yet to grow
And know just what this strange **** craves

It isn’t simple as giving orders, or showering me with delight
The heart of the matter lies in the murky deep,
The root causes the illness I wear from head to feet

Dissolve me in heavy salt and weightless oil
Purify me on mountaneous rock
Shake me in the willows endless, indifferent sorrow
Throw me away to make sure I’m for keeps

And maybe then after years of struggle
Summers burnt and winters melted,
I will still play my vengeful game and give you eyes that say
“I’m better, you will never win.”

It's easy to see why you fell in love with him,
It's easy to see why you hoped you found forever
But you didn't.
And that disappointment felt like a death
and you have been trapped between anger and denial
for four years.
You think you must bury him in order to bury your grief.
And convincing others of this too
has become a game
where you sleep and play
inside your litter box.
Now the feces of hatred and revenge
stick to your feet wherever you go.
You must turn him into a monster
by telling anyone who will listen
that he is haunting you—and you really want this to be true
because that would mean he was still interested in your life.
But when you are alone and still…you remember...
coffee and stories, genuine kindness
and you know, his only crime was breaking your heart.

I understand your heartbreak;
you saw your knight in shining armor,
The answer to your loneliness.
Your pathway out of poverty.
His demeanor is gentle,
his quiet, listening face
hears your words with truth and interest;
every sentence is allowed to live its full life
until you are validated and understood.
He is your biggest fan, a loving caregiver.
Children and animals are drawn to him
like a shepherd or a father or a friend.
We both know he gave 8 years to a child,
a paraplegic who wasn’t even his own.
Bathed him, carried him, wiped drool from his chin
and in between all the doctors, made him laugh.
He offers himself to everyone this way, so

I understand why losing him hurt you so wholly
I know this, because I love him too.
But I think you and I define love very differently;
I wouldn’t want someone whom I had to threaten to make him stay.
I wouldn’t derive my identity from an unspoken contract
or imaginary promises that I insisted he owed me.
I wouldn’t try to destroy another human being
for the sole purpose of hiding my own embarrassment.
You see, love would remember his beautiful soul
and love would sincerely want him to be happy

Even if that meant he found happiness without you.

Through barking dogs
?Hooting owls, hissing snakes
?And twilight ghosts,?
The night gets to the day.