My argent queen, once I thought,
of pride and worth, and wrath
I looked upon your pale, fair face
And followed down your path
Once, I was torn and driven
between honor and disgrace
Until all hope and life and light
Dissolved beneath a haze

Oh Lady, all of my desire
I lost and earned again
Once in a day, once in a week
I whondered, here and then
How I got lost inside this mire
Of hopelessness and rage
I fled, I charged, I stashed
rushing to the deepest,
darkest stage

I called you lady, even then
Yet bitterness is gone
My fear and fume slowly recede
And every task is done
I still can hear your chant
When you are full and fair
But now, your voice is far and faint
My mind diverted and restrained
And I feel banned and bare
Under a new, seductive call
Ensnaring all my heart

Why does my heart go on beating
While my body and mind
Bleed no more
No thought no cry
And my body will die
When the world sings to my core

Why is my temper still rising
When my will and my wit
Lose their bite
No battle no brawl
Would bring me to fall
Yet silence
Will spread through my mind

Silence and chanting alternate
I got little space in between
And like a ban whispered to my mind
I’m slowly going insane

Call the shadows I’m sinking
I’m loosing my stand
With no cure or death
I’m reaching no end
Until hopelessness
Drives me to my demise
And I am falling
To a rotten paradise

This life that I am living,
I can’t take it anymore,
It’s to the point where even breathing,
Is too much of a chore,
The sadness overwhelms me,
When I’m laying in my bed,
And the only cure for it,
Is a bullet to my head,
People say that change will come,
But all I hear is lies,
Whats the point anyway,
When in the end everyone dies?
If I were to die now,
I’d be freed from my sadness,
So why should I go on,
When doing so feels like madness?

In terms of life, I sunk to lowest form,
and all about,  my glory came to naught,
for God had sure abandoned His creation,
and I was living in the death I'd wrought.

No life for me,  beyond this current hell.
No hope to ride,  no meandering retreat.
For sure as heaven spat upon my presence,
so too did Hades signal my defeat.

So where to go. I lingered within madness.
I wandered through a shame I'd bought with glee.
I thought if only I made my own choices,
then God would surely let me to be free.

But never in the history of heaven
has one like I been left to wander madly.
For just as that thought entered to my mind,
so too God cast aside my heart... and gladly.

Now I wander sadly through the darkness
wearing my shame like a hardened quilt.
But I know if I could redo my choices,
I'd do my best just to avoid this guilt.