Don't you think it's funny how,
My skin turns blue after the shock of your eye,
How my teeth crack forefeeling an explosion,
But my mouth stays shut,
Right after yours has opened for ever.

Dear mom,

You’re not perfect
I know you never will be
Maybe I hold you too high a standard
That your legs and arms can’t reach
Maybe I hold grudges I shouldn’t
And I know that makes you feel upset
I have a hard time forgetting
But I do forgive
I’m not perfect
And you know I never will be

You’re my mom
Sometimes I act like you’re not
I’m guilty of spilling words of regret
I’m guilty just as you are of mistakes
I’m your son
Sometimes you acted like I’m not
You’re guilty of intolerance
You’re guilty just as I am of mistakes

Words have escaped our lips
We both know shouldn’t have been said
They lay in the past
With pain and regret
They’ve sprouted into something better
A feeling and movement of love
To conquer those bad vibrancies

It doesn’t take 24 hours to restore a wound
Yet I see your love through your actions
Wrapping itself on my scars
Eagerly wanting them to heal
And I hope as time passes you see me Walk through the pathway you’ve started to build


Often, we take one step forward and Two steps back
But we are always improving from the person we were yesterday
Hence progress that wasn’t always there
And I’m appreciative of the energy you set forth into me

Thank you.

sometimes when you say things
I wonder if you know
just. how. much.
what you say matters to me

other people's words I can brush off
and forget
but your words cut deep
they sting and ache for a while
and maybe longer
until there is only a mark left
only the mirror knows how many wounds
you have inflicted

when you insult me
I will spend the next few days
looking at myself different.
did you know that?
no, you didn't.

you're inconsiderate, to put it nicely
but even our friends note
you're nicer to me.
I wonder why, honestly.

Me has podrido la carne,
ya fétida y flácida, atada
a esta infértil existencia.
Sin rebeldía alguna
me someto a tu yugo.
Derramemos mi sangre
y bailemos sobre mis
lágrimas en el fango.
Asqueados de este ente,
aniquilemos mi esencia.

We all need to learn
how to love on our own,
but *******
you made me hate being alone.

Please know , I didn’t leave because i wanted to. I let go because you left me no other choice. I’m never the type to give up so easily & drop you. I’m the type to give you chance after chance even if you’ve done me wrong. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you however toxic you may be, even if it’s hurting me, breaking me, only because I don’t want to be remembered as the person who hurt you. As the person who “left.” I’m not the type to give up on people or let them go, but if ever I decide to, please understand it took all the air in me, all the energy in me, all the strength & courage to do so. I don’t give up easily. I don’t let go easily, but if you give me a million small reasons to walk away, I’ll walk away after my cup of chances runs out, knowing i gave you my all & i tried my best. Not giving me a good reason to stay, is a good enough reason for me to leave. So i hope one day you realize how much i truly did care for you. I promise you’ll miss me being there, putting up with your **** & refusing to give up on you. You’ll regret everything you’ve ever done to hurt me. Including all the damage you’ve caused.   One thing will always remain true, i loved you , cared for you, respected you when all i got was pain. That’s a scar that will always stay.


-Nani

will the ache in my bones ever end ?